To think that the workplace is generally shite?

[malificent7]

I mean the political side of things.

Colleagues may be pleasant enough but you cannot be proper friends with them if you are going for a promotion etc.
Also it seems to be one massive power struggle thag i cannot be arsed with( shame i need money).
Plus i seem to be shite at every job i do despite getting great grades i cannot seem to cut it in the workplace..

Why can’t you be friends with someone if you’re going for a promotion?

Well you can but if you are both going for the same promotion then you have to put yourself first.

Which creates weirdness.

What industries have you worked in?

Yanbu, I can’t stand office politics either. I like the people I work with but rarely cross over into genuine friends territory.

YANBU OP. I was bullied out of a workplace by so-called 'friends' after being recommended to apply, and subsequently offered a job half of them applied for (and obviously didn't get).

I've remained genuine friends with people who got promoted to jobs I went for. I've also supported people who got promoted and found their friends turned on them. Bottom line is if they can't be happy for your promotion (through disappointment of course, people are human) they weren't ever really friends. But friends can exist in the workplace for sure.

I think it's important to get along with colleagues. I admit I've worked with a lot of people who I've not particularly liked but overall I've got along with most . One of my oldest friends is a ex colleague but I don't expect everyone to be my friend.

Work is vile.

I mainly like my job but I only do it because they pay me. It's what we all have to do, or most of us, it keeps us in houses, rented or bought, keeps us fed and helps us buy nice things like holidays and pretty duvet covers. Focus on what work brings, try to get good relationships and friendships outside work and ignore the politics as far as possible.

I have made some good friends through work, btw, but that's not what I go to work for, it's a bonus.

Totally agree OP, couldn’t stand anymore politics/pettiness, etc, now work from home and am so grateful, you have my sympathies

Your workplace sounds nothing like mine.

I work for a huge company and luckily I don't see much of this at all. I assume it goes on at high levels, but the people I interact with day to day are generally helpful and genuinely friendly, across all areas. Thank god.

Nearly all my best friends have been made through my work. I’ve got 15 people coming to my birthday celebration in a couple of weeks and 10 of them are ex or current work colleagues. I don’t notice a lot of office politics either, most people focus on doing their job well and collaborate with each other in the offices I have worked in. I guess I have been lucky.

Agree the politics are unreal. My colleagues great but boss moody. That puts me on edge some times. Have found women more bitchy though over the years! Im late 40s

YANBU. I'm so grateful I've been able to be self-employed for most of the past 18 years. So many workplaces these days are like bear pits. The main thing I couldn't stand was all the compulsory jumping through hoops to demonstrate you're a 'team player' rather than your work being allowed to speak for itself.

I think you've been unfortunate in your workplaces. I've never suffered from petty office rivalries - perhaps it's because my work is highly specialist, and I'm always the only one of me in a team. And the team depend on me, which is a good position to be in.

But 99% of the people I've worked with have been lovely. I've made a lot of good friends - people I've remained in contact with even after we have both moved on to other roles. One is part of my escape room group.

I have worked in both types of workplace. Those that are like this, where politics and backstabbing and resentment override everything else, and friendships are superficial, and those where people encourage each other and genuinely enjoy seeing other people succeed. Until I worked in the latter, I had no idea that such a place existed. But they do. Finding a job in one is life changing.

Not just the politics. It’s all bollocks.
(From a public sector worker doing a worthwhile job)

I think you've been unfortunate.

I've worked in menial jobs (stacking shelves) and management jobs. All involve politics and nonsense. As PP said, try to keep your head down, if work was fun they wouldnt have to pay you 😁

There was a distinct change in atmosphere after the recession began (at least in my industry) and it's never recovered. We were all well-paid, good benefits, bonuses. Life was comfortable so stress levels were down. Now it feels like we're competing for every tiny scrap, despite business levels recovering.

Instead of the wealth being spread across the entire company, our SMT have drained the coffers to enrich themselves, while refusing pay raises for the ranks. We had an email reporting recording profits one day, and the very next day an email saying no pay raises due to budgetary cuts. You couldn't make it up.

@BorneoBabe that's true, top management always find the budget for their own pay rises, meanwhile middle management and below get rubbish. I agree with higher pay for bigger jobs, but pay rises should be everyone eligible or no one.

I'd love to be self employed but I suspect that's a different challenge

I think you've been unlucky in your work environments, OP. I've generally got along well with workmates, owe some of my closest friendships to work, and while there are inevitable disappointments with promotions, I can't say I've noticed rivalrous behaviour around them.

I think you must have some odd ideas about friendship -- do you think friendships are all 'You OK, hun!'? Of course you can be friends with people with whom you are competing for a promotion. What makes it 'weird'? You should 'put yourself first' anyway in any balanced friendship!

Plus i seem to be shite at every job i do despite getting great grades i cannot seem to cut it in the workplace.

But there is absolutely no correlation between your academic achievements at school or university, and your success in the workplace. You might as well complain that because you're not good at cooking, you'll never make senior management. (I mean, unless you are actually a chef ).

Can you get some honest feedback at your next appraisal, and focus on addressing anything that comes up as a concern or weakness?