Suicide prevention.

[Funnyfarmer]

I work in a call centre. The company I work for help to arrange for customers to pre pay for their funerals.
I called a lady today, after she had requested a call on our website. After a bit chat she told me, she was trying to arrange things because she was got to kill herself. Theres no doubt in my mind this lady was serious. I asked her to phone samaritans. She replied "thankyou so much for your concern, but I wont be doing that" We're not allowed to sell to people who could possibly be vulnerable, so obviously I couldn't assist her, in that department and was encouraged to end the call by my manager. I'm absolutely not allowed to do this under any circumstances, but I made a note of her phone number. I want to contact her. If I do I could loose my job. But this is a woman's life! I've had a hell of a lot to deal with lately myself and not handling things too well. My freinds say it's not my place and its absolutely the last thing I should be trying to deal with. I know if I contact a third party, like the police or local authorities nothing will be done, especially as I only took a note of her phone number not her address. Even if did contact a third party, I'm still sharing a customers information without her consent. Not only is that against company policy, its actually also illegal.
I couldn't find the "what would you do page" I'm not a regular user, so I posted here. What would you do? AIBU to contact her, outside of work?

I'd email the police and tell them what you've told us.

I’m not sure what you could do in all honesty apart from ask her to seek help. But I wouldn’t risk your job by passing her info on, and I don’t think it would be appropriate to contact her outside of work hours about a non work matter - even with the best intentions.

So you thought you’d put it on AIBU?
Follow your company’s policy and give this woman the respect of anonymity ffs.

Surely it's legal to share her information with the police if there is a real concern for safety or welfare.

The sad fact of the matter is that if someone has made the decision to carry through with this, then there is only so much you can do to help them. You are not personally responsible for their actions. I say this as someone who has actually had people in the middle of the act on the end of the phone. You cannot save everyone unfortunately.

Its people like you, why I'm not a regular user of this page.

@Saucery. Its because of people like you why I don't regularly use the page. I just dont understand the bitterness

Contact the police.

Ask your work for suicide prevention training.

Contact the samaritans, give them her number? I don’t think the rules apply in situations like this.

Very difficult, I'm not sure what you should do.
On one hand a life is potentially at risk, on the other hand your job is definitely at risk.
Could you talk to your line manager about this for advice on what to do now this situation has arisen?

In my job (HCA in a hospital) if a patient expresses suicidal intent to you you have to document it & the psych team are usually called.

But your job obviously is very different.
The lady should not have put this burden on you by telling you but then she probably isn't thinking straight.

You sound like a nice caring person though.

I don't think you can do anything in this case.

I do think your company should take a more responsible and helpful policy towards you and the caller though.

Contact the police they might be able to trace an address.

Are calls recorded at your workplace and easy to access? If so, I'd call 111 and tell them that your manager told you not to pass details on but you have concerns.
They might want to listen to the call and get her details that way. And then maybe you 'found' your notes and oh look, you write her phone number down.

You can't help everyone but it's good of you to try to help her.

Phone the Police now and tell them what you told us.

You definitely shouldn’t contact her - that would be a huge violation of her privacy, and contravene all kinds of rules about personal data.

I’m so sorry you’ve been through this, it is very distressing for you. You haven’t failed to save her, and this isn’t on your shoulders.

I would ask your work to provide suicide prevention training for the future.

I hope you’re ok x

It's not illegal to break confidentiality if you are concerned about someone's safety, so no worries there.

I would call the police, then you know you have done what you can.

Find out policy at work and ring mental health

And yes, your company needs a much better policy around this.

I would not contact her yourself.

The only thing you can do is report it to the authorities, what they do with that information is then up to them. I can only imagine how difficult this may be when it goes against your companies policy, but it is legal to share information in this way.

And to echo the poster above, please remember that you are not responsible for this person's actions in any way

It's difficult because it might be a cry for help, if it was my family member I would hope you would alert someone but usually people who are intending to go through with something like this wouldn't tell anyone as they don't want to be helped.

I think I would email my manager and request they look into it as your worried, then you have done what you can but don't risk your own job.

I think there is probably an issue around imminence of any plan and breaching confidently, this lady is planning her funeral and wasn’t able to with your company and so isn’t likely to end her life right now, the lack of immediacy may be what lands you in trouble. You did the right thing by being kind and suggesting she gets help.

usually people who are intending to go through with something like this wouldn't tell anyone as they don't want to be helped.

Never assume that anyone who tells you they are intending to end their own life won't do it. That is a myth.

www.helpguide.org/articles/suicide-prevention/suicide-prevention.htm

Police, definitely asap. And thank you for caring.

Very true U2, and people with genuine intentions will often put their affairs in order first
I think you should contact the police and leave it with them, it's their job, not yours, to keep vulnerable people safe. Your company should have policies in place for this kind of situation which is very forseeable, and likely to cause avoidable stress to employees.

I think you've already done as much as you could have done.

Samaritans can't give you advice but if you're struggling with how you feel about this you could call them yourself to talk to someone confidentially.

Police. Right now. Then get rid of the phone number.

That sounds traumatic! Definitely phone the police- you can at first just discuss the issue in general and then on request provide them with her number.