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AIBU?

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Original poster

New bf has pics of women on his social media

42 replies

Billypig · 05/03/2020 14:33

I met a man three months ago. He is very sweet and affectionate.

Things are going very well, except he posts pics of women on his Facebook profile. These pics aren't explicit in the slightest but include two of his favourite TV presenters and he also posts pics of 'memories' of him with (attractive) female friends. On his phone wallpaper is one of these presenters. He's 43. Is this normal? Should I be offended?

OP posts:
PurpleFlower1983 · 05/03/2020 14:34

If you’re 3 months in and this bothers you honestly I would cut your losses and move on.

Tunnocks34 · 05/03/2020 14:34

Is he in the picture? I posted a memory recently of me with the actor who played Neville Longbottom. I’m just a fan - doesn’t have any bearing on my marriage or how I perceive my husband

Nicknacky · 05/03/2020 14:35

The presenter thing is a bit immature but no big deal, but what’s the issue with his friends? He can’t erase the past or his friends because he has now met you.

Original poster
Billypig · 05/03/2020 14:38

He is in the pic with his friends. With the presenters he's never met them. Just finds them very attractive.

OP posts:
GiveHerHellFromUs · 05/03/2020 14:40

My DPs screensaver is Hayley Williams from Paramore and he has female friends that I've known before I met him. It's fine.

If you're this bothered 3 months in I'd just walk away.

Nicknacky · 05/03/2020 14:40

Why do you think you should be offended?

Newkitchen123 · 05/03/2020 14:40

You sound a bit needy and possessive.

nickname302 · 05/03/2020 14:41

I'd be annoyed if my boyfriend's phone background was another woman! Maybe jokingly suggest he changes it to a picture of you?

BumbleBeee69 · 05/03/2020 14:43

his FB page is his bedroom wall when he was 12 years old huh ... Find someone in tune with your needs OP.. not someone still chasing fantasy women...

nosleepp · 05/03/2020 14:43

I’d deffo be annoyed if he was just posting pictures of these presents because he finds them attractive, it’s just weird

Nicknacky · 05/03/2020 14:44

She only met him three months ago, it’s too full on to ask him to change his phone picture to one of the op!

I’ve never had my husbands photo on my phone.

DingleberryRose · 05/03/2020 14:54

If a man had written this about his new girlfriend I’d be very concerned that the relationship would turn abusive. Sounds controlling and possessive.

YakkityYakYakYak · 05/03/2020 15:15

Not necessarily out of order re the presenters but I’d find it a bit childish, unless he’s doing it tongue in cheek.

Don’t see anything wrong with him posting photos with female friends, unless he’s very blatantly just selecting the attractive ones to make himself look good.

Booboostwo · 05/03/2020 15:19

He should cut his losses and drop you. You sound completely unreasonable.

golferswife · 05/03/2020 15:20

I’d find it honestly a bit creepy and sad. Maybe iabu but that just reminds me of being a teen in school.

Canadianpancake · 05/03/2020 15:22

I used to have a picture of Rik Mayall on my FB.

I think you would benefit from doing a bit of work on yourself op because your self esteem seems quite low.

Everydaylife · 05/03/2020 15:22

I think that’s very childish for 43.

Everydaylife · 05/03/2020 15:22

Which presenters?

HaddawayAndShite · 05/03/2020 15:23

It’s sad that you think he shouldn’t be posting pictures of his friends. Would you be this upset if it were male friends? The presenter thing is a red herring, you’ve been together for 3 months presumably he had these screensavers before you were together, they’re just a celeb crush. Sounds like there could be some underlying issues with OPs trust / jealousy issues.

RhymingRabbit3 · 05/03/2020 15:29

Would you be upset if he was posting memories with unattractive female friends? Or with male friends? I dont see why this is an issue to you, but if it is you might as well break I with him now because 3 months in things should be easy.

PawPawNoodle · 05/03/2020 15:29

Not women! The horror.

DollyDaydream70 · 05/03/2020 15:39

I think men that behave like this are immature and perhaps trying to push buttons.. My partner is very good friends with an old ex girlfriend. They speak on the phone, live close to each other and have a lot of memories and friends in common. I'd be a liar if I said this didn't strike me as unusual and odd in the early days, but since getting to know him, I know she is not threat and I am secure in my relationship (I wouldn't be in it if I wasn't). My partner never posts pic's of this ex on his social media, neither does he post pic's of any other women, famous or non-famous, either. This man you mention sounds like the type who would go out of his way to try to make you jealous later on.. I mean, what grown man behaves like that? When you're a 16 yr old boy maybe, but a grown man? That'd be a big fat NOPE for me!

PeterPanGoesWrong · 05/03/2020 15:44

I think ybvu to expect him to forget his friends and stop liking the celebrity crushes he obviously has.
I’d be mightily offended if someone told me to stop posting pictures f me with my friends.

Aquamarine1029 · 05/03/2020 15:47

He sounds like a teenage boy, not a 43 year old man. Creepy, pathetic, and grossly immature. Run for the hills.

FlaskMaster · 05/03/2020 15:48

Yanbu about the celebs. Who the duck posts pics of random celebs they fancy unless they're about 12. I'd definitely lose respect for him and attraction to him for that.
Yabu and weird about sharing memory posts of himself with friends.