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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

Slightly petty one, but who's BU?!

51 replies

notyourmummy · 05/03/2020 07:30

My husband went to a gig a few weeks ago (local singer he's seen quite a few times now) and his ticket has been on the table in the front room since he got back. Yesterday, DD (2) decided to put some stickers on it to make it pretty for daddy. When he got home from his late shift, he took all the stickers off and put them in the bin because he "wanted to keep the ticket to put in the CD case". I think he's being ridiculous because the ticket had been sitting around for a couple of weeks and it's just a piece of card with the name of the singer and the date of the gig on, he's angry with me because I let DD deface his ticket. AIBU to think he's a cock for being pissed off??

OP posts:

Damntheman · 05/03/2020 08:45

He's lucky the ticket didn't get binned considering he left it lying about and it had already been used. If he wants his ticket stubs pristine he needs to put them out of toddler reach. The argument is a bit petty to be honest, but he's the unreasonable one.

JRUIN · 05/03/2020 08:49

Maybe I'm reading this wrong but it sounds like he was pissed off with you ridiculing him for wanting to keep the ticket rather than with your DD for putting stickers on it. He should be more careful to put 'precious' things out of reach of a toddler, and you should learn to be a bit more understanding and a bit less controlling.

GiveHerHellFromUs · 05/03/2020 09:22

@JRUIN how did you possibly manage to decipher that the OP is controlling?

Thatsmyspot · 05/03/2020 09:33

He should have put it away, simples! YANBU

BlueVeins · 05/03/2020 09:36

How old is he? 14?

NomDeDieu · 05/03/2020 09:44

If something is so precious, you dint leave it where a 2yo can reach it. And even less so in an area where she knows she can play/put stickers on.

He is trying to make you responsible for his carelessness

eggontoast2 · 05/03/2020 10:11

I would have binned or shredded it if it had been left on the table for more than a week! He's lucky it was still there.

JustInCaseCakeHappens · 05/03/2020 10:19

He's unreasonable not to take care of his belongings. With toddlers or pets in the house, you put things away, or it's your own damn fault if they get played with.

JRUIN · 05/03/2020 10:26

@JRUIN how did you possibly manage to decipher that the OP is controlling?

Just the fact that she seems so bothered about him keeping the ticket.

AlCalavicci · 05/03/2020 22:17

@notyourmummy
You are right he probably can remember the gigs without the tickets but sometimes it is nice to have something a bit more tangible , When I was going to gigs a lot around 25yrs ago FB and camera phones were not a thing hence me keeping tickets and photos I took with my prized Cannon F1 camera .

@burritofan
What may be litter to you can be a wonderful keepsake for others .

But then OPs DH should of put it away

Cherrysoup · 05/03/2020 22:27

He should have put it somewhere safe. I pinned a ticket of my DH’s on the cork board, dumb of me, I should have asked. He was not happy, it was a significant event, I realise it was stupid of me.

FlamingoAndJohn · 05/03/2020 22:27

If he wanted to keep it then he should have put it away.

Symbollove · 05/03/2020 22:28

Tbh I hate stickers, i too would take it off and Throw in the bin.

Nomel · 06/03/2020 05:28

If something was on my table for two weeks it would have been put in the bin, he’s lucky the ticket only had stickers on it!

NatashaAlianovaRomanova · 06/03/2020 05:47

Who leaves shit on their kitchen table for a fortnight? If a used ticket had been dumped on my table it'd have been binned the next morning at breakfast time.

He's being an arse OP but I think you need to revise your attitude towards letting DD deface anything & everything with stickers especially if you leave things lying around for weeks - one day it will be something important & one of those stickers that are welded on unable to be peeled off without destroying the ticket/birthday card/work project/divorce papers.

NearlyGranny · 06/03/2020 06:10

He needs to up his tidiness game. My DH has a similar scatter approach with his wallet, phone, pocket items etc. He made himself a little shelf in the laundry by the back door, so I pop any random bits there. He gets annoyed and calls me 'controlling' if I ask him whether some scrap of paper is important or what he wants doing with it, but now he knows where to look so neither of us says anything.

I'm not the tidiest myself but leaving something lying around for a fortnight is excessive - the kitchen table cannot be preserved indefinitely like a crime scene, after all!

NearlyGranny · 06/03/2020 06:16

I did 'cure' him of leaving his size 11 shoes in traffic areas by putting homemade 'Police Aware' labels on them, though he re-offended massively when we visited DS and heavily pregnant DiL recently. Kicked his shoes off and abandoned them just inside the sitting room door in the angle between two sofas where she was the next to walk in and stumbled over them. If she'd fallen..!

He could never get that a pregnant woman literally can't see her own feet towards the end.

Iloveacurry · 06/03/2020 06:22

If he wanted to keep it, he shouldn’t of left it out for a 2 year old to pick up and decorate!

KatherineJaneway · 06/03/2020 06:26

I keep all my concert tickets but I wouldn't leave them lying around with a young child on the loose.

Original poster

notyourmummy · 06/03/2020 06:37

@JRUIN I couldn't care less whether he keeps tickets, I just thought it was a huge overreaction on his part to go mad over a few stickers on it. He could've put it in the CD case with the stickers on.

OP posts:

Purplelion · 06/03/2020 06:49

But why should he keep the stickers on it? Just because you’re not bothered by stickers doesn’t mean other people aren’t. I keep gig tickets and bits like that and I wouldn’t appreciate stickers all over it. My DD (2) knows that stickers are for her colouring books as paper, you do need to teach your DC not to stick them anywhere they fancy because one day you’ll be trying to get one off something important!

Teabunny · 06/03/2020 07:06

It takes forever for my husband to put his crap memorabilia away too. Huge hoarder. I have to confront him regularly on this issue. He collects, I chuck out. I'm sorry, but if you want to keep something nice put it away. in the garage so I don't have to see it I am not one for keeping things at all.

OP, you are right. If my DD was smaller and decorated a ticket to some gig I would have said, just put it away, and some time in the future when I'm having a clear-out we'll find that ticket and go, Aw! So cute! as teenage DD is saying, Ugh! So Lame!

OtherVoicesOtherRooms · 06/03/2020 07:07

If you knew that your DH saved gig tickets along with the actual CD like a teenager

Why did you let your DD decorate it? Doesn't matter if he left it lying around. You know he saves them so obviously he's going to be pissed off.

OtherVoicesOtherRooms · 06/03/2020 07:11

one day it will be something important & one of those stickers that are welded on unable to be peeled off without destroying the ticket/birthday card/work project/divorce papers.

Haha!!

LettertoHermoine · 06/03/2020 07:43

I totally get where he is coming from BUT he should have put it away.

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