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To think I have messed this all up

6 replies

Treewall21 · 02/03/2020 14:47

I have name changed because this could be identifying. In November I was mugged in central London the attacker told me he had a knife and told me to hand over my phone (of course I did). I used a bystander’s phone to call the police and they were absolutely lovely and amazing. We logged onto find my iPhone and found the location of my phone and low and behold the attacker was walking out of a tube station and they had my phone in a sock. I had to identify him from the police car. Anyway, they had to take a statement from me and took my phone away as evidence. I was given it back 2 weeks later.

After the incident, I was extremely shaken up as I had been struggling at work recently and already felt very very low and this made it 10x worse. This impacted me monumentally and my GP diagnosed me with depression and PTSD and I have been on antidepressants since.

I had been sent a few emails about sending for a charging decision etc. but nothing or any significance. Bearing in mind I hadn’t let the police know about my diagnoses. Last week I was given a call to say I would have to go to a police station to formally ID them - I agreed to this. Last night, I was feeling extremely worried about it as I had only just managed to begin to put this behind me and get his face out of my mind. My route to the station to ID them would mean going past where it happened and where I last saw them. It just felt like too much and I wasn’t ready for it. I contacted victim support who was great and they gave me advice on how to move forward and we agreed to send an email.

I got a response from the police officer after sending an email last night about how I was feeling and it has just made me feel like sh**e. It was along the lines of it needs to be done so we can apply for extended bail conditions - if they aren’t ID’d this is unlikely.

I just feel like I have messed up the investigation, that all of this will have been for nothing. Just feel like utter sh*t and just need to hear some other thoughts.

OP posts:
NoMorePoliticsPlease · 02/03/2020 14:50

Can you still do the ID?

Treewall21 · 02/03/2020 14:51

Yes I have told them I will do it at a later stage if I can get one of my friend/family to attend

OP posts:
BumbleBeee69 · 02/03/2020 14:52

OP this sounds terrifying... you must speak openly about how this has affected you... maybe a group therapy with people who have experienced similar... anything that helps you be you again...

With regards the Police... could you ask someone to attend with you..

Bringringbring12 · 02/03/2020 15:00

The door isn’t closed
They have been clear that if you don’t do it then there will be problems
You can still do it
You haven’t messed up
Explain situation. They may be able to collect and return you

WorraLiberty · 02/03/2020 15:03

Can someone from victim support attend with you?

I'm sorry the email made you feel like shit but in all honesty it's true.

Police generally never ever have time or resources to follow up on these sorts of muggings in my area (London/Essex), so I'm guessing they need this guy for other crimes too.

AnchorDownDeepBreath · 02/03/2020 15:09

You haven't messed up... and they won't have intended you to feel like that. But they do have to let you know that if you can't ID them, they may have to release him - they need your positive ID to be able to extend his bail.

I do totally appreciate that it will be hugely difficult for you Flowers... is there anyone at all who is available today/tomorrow and would make you feel better about it? An acquaintance? Someone from victim support?

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