We have a 2yo and a 4yo. 4yo sleeps well through the night although does like snuggles esp if having bad dreams.
2yo goes to sleep well, but rarely lasts all night. Usually up at least once between midnight and 4am. Can be settled quickly with a shh or a cuddle, otherwise starts howling and wants milk / wants to get up and play with toys / generally becomes a pain in the arse.
We have a 2-bedroom flat but it's a weird layout, with the bedrooms at opposite ends and the kitchen, utility room, back door and then a long hall between them. I don't like to sleep so far from the kids, even though the baby monitor is on, for three reasons:
- Ridiculous over-anxiety about being physically far away from them in the event of a house fire or burglary
- The absolute hassle of having to get up and trudge through to settle them when one of them wakes up instead of just quickly shushing them if I'm already in the room
- My husband falls asleep really quickly and doesn't like cuddles and makes stupid noises when he breathes, also he has to get up really early for work most days, so we generally sleep better if we are in different rooms!
So for all these reasons, I bought a small double bed for my 4yo when it was time to upgrade from her toddler bed. I sleep in there next to her. Sometimes my husband takes a turn sleeping there, to give me a night off and a full night's sleep in our own bedroom.
I would say this situation is working well, although my husband isn't keen because he thinks it's weird and he just wants to be 'normal' (whatever that is!)
I should add, I don't think this affects our sex life negatively - I think stress, lack of sleep and exercise take their toll on our sex lives more than sleeping in separate beds! If anything, this arrangement makes us make more of an effort and plan a date night now and then.
I don't want to hear a lot of rude and abusive messages on here, as I don't really want to change the situation right now. I love every moment of sleeping in the same room as my kids, hearing their little breathing noises and giving them a little shush or a cuddle when they are having a bad dream. They are only little once, and I don't want to look back and regret cuddling them every chance I had :) I also want to point out our kids seem pretty confident and well adjusted, they don't get upset if I am away for a weekend, and don't get upset staying overnight at their grandparents house. So I don't think this arrangement is negatively affecting them.
I am just really interested in finding out if many other Mums think this is unreasonable or not. Or should I be more 'normal' and sleep in my own bedroom with my husband?!!