My MIL has announced that she wants to be known as "Granny Charles" (Charles being my deceased FILs first name) rather than "Granny" or "Granny Susan" (her first name) or "Granny Davenport" (their last name).
I never knew my FIL as he died some time before I met my husband. We have already agreed to name any first born son "Charles" to honour DH's father. I don't want my DD referring to her granny as granny 'deceased grandfather's name' as I find it sexist (she has her own name), morbid (he's her dead husband) and inappropriate (if we end up with a son also named Charles). DH on the fence.
I understand that she wants to keep him in memory but to me it feels uncomfortable.
For background, my MIL has form for being an interfering control freak and politically sits somewhere to the right of Mussolini with reference to women, immigration, race, the poor, etc, so I understand this may be colouring my view of whether this request in itself is unreasonable. So as not to drip feed, we have a strained relationship as I'm a working female doctor rather than a 'proper stay at home mother', I vote more liberally, and occasionally have felt obligated to call her out if she mentions 'the blacks' or indeed 'the jews'.
I would like her to pick a grandparent name (Gran/Grandma/Granny/Nan/whatever else) and either leave it at that or add in her own first or last name if she wishes.
So Mumsnet! Tell me: AIBU?