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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Please can we stop

52 replies

MadameBee · 29/02/2020 10:29

Bringing Caroline Flack into every single bleeding post?

Thanks

It’s really sad that she killed herself but sadly, she is not the first and will not be the last and I don’t think it was purely down to SM or MN.

I am sick of the bitchiest correspondents on my own SM surrounding their profile picture with a “be kind” logo (I don’t need to be told to do this) and posters here bringing her up on every thread.

(Didn’t want to put her name into the title as seemed a bit Hmm )

OP posts:
Fuckitwhynot · 29/02/2020 11:18

I agree. All these ‘nice’ people have no qualms about using her death to virtue signal and attention seek.

KitKat1985 · 29/02/2020 11:22

I agree. The vast majority of people never knew her on any personal level, and wouldn't have been remotely interested in her death if she hadn't of been famous, and sadly hundreds of other people kill themselves every year and no-one on here seems that worried about them. It's tedious and exploitative to make her death about individuals' virtue signalling for people to make themselves look good.

CassidyStone · 29/02/2020 11:44

I actually find it nauseating that so many other celebrities are cashing in on how well they knew the woman and how devastated they were by her death. Did any of them step up and offer support after her arrest in December? Who knows? Maybe they did.

From the last unpublished Instagram post released by her family, she was obviously very unwell and in a very dark place - not necessarily entirely due to social media and bullying from journalists. She took her own life rather than carry on.

It's a tragedy for her family and friends, and sad in general when someone dies by suicide, but all the #bekind stuff is getting tiresome. And when #bekind spills over onto a thread where someone says they don't particularly like the name Rosie-May, it's just daft.

MajesticWhine · 29/02/2020 11:45

I also wonder why everyone assumes Caroline took her life owing to the media onslaught she received (it all passed me by), and not because her (alleged) history of violent and abusive behaviour was about to be revealed and exposed and therefore her popularity and career in tatters

^ I was going to comment, but Pictish said it best

Original poster
MadameBee · 29/02/2020 11:46

Kerry Katona seems to turn up like a bad smell whenever there is trouble.

OP posts:
AccioCats · 29/02/2020 11:47

Please can we stop
Today 10:29 MadameBee

Bringing Caroline Flack into every single bleeding post?

Oh the irony! Grin

partofthepeanutgallery · 29/02/2020 11:47

Completely agree. Especially the numerous posts I see from people who are gossipy, mean and vile about others regularly, too.

I have a relative who killed himself at 13 ... literally bullied to death. I really hate the hypocrisy from so many who bully others or know that their kids are ... and yet pretend they're lovely people. They're not.

Original poster
MadameBee · 29/02/2020 11:49

@pictish

Yes - to be painfully honest, how do you accidentally hit someone over the head with a lamp. I don’t know she was clearly a troubled lady.

I do wonder what the reaction would be if she were male.

All that aside though, I don’t know why this seems to be a bigger headline than any other celebrity suicide.

OP posts:
LyndaSnellsSniff · 29/02/2020 11:50

The whole thing is crackers. I was invited to join a FB group called Be Kind for Caroline Flack. No way would I do that. It’s so hypocritical.

Nobody is “kind” 100% of the time. Nobody will change their behaviour because of this.

Most of the people I know who are adding #BeKind to their SM posts are the very people who rip others apart but then play down their nastiness by adding “bless her/him” to the end of their character assassination.

Original poster
MadameBee · 29/02/2020 11:51

@AccioCats

It’s not irony is it?

I am not saying #bekind

I am saying lets stop being so bloody silly about this.

OP posts:
TheyDoDoThat · 29/02/2020 11:53

I have genuinely not seen her mentioned on one thread Iv read apart from the one specifically about her.

Original poster
MadameBee · 29/02/2020 11:56

I have seen at least 3 in the last few days.

OP posts:
AccioCats · 29/02/2020 11:57

The irony is that you’re banging on about the very person you say you’re fed up of being brought up in posts!

Original poster
MadameBee · 29/02/2020 12:00

I am fed up of people coming on to threads and saying “in light of recent events” etc when it has nothing in the slightest to do with “recent events”

OP posts:
Thenextstorm · 29/02/2020 12:01

Hasn't this been covered enough?? God there were so many threads in the days after it's just rehashing.

LordOfTheWhys · 29/02/2020 12:04

Yy I have seen it on threads on here. Usually a poster who has just ripped someone else to shreds suddenly says 'be kind' if someone disagrees with them. It's vacuous nonsense. It's virtue signalling for bullies.

waterlego · 29/02/2020 12:04

Yes, I too am a bit bored of being urged to ‘be kind’ as if it’s something that’s never occurred to me before. As PPs have said, it takes more than being kind to prevent suicides.

Many of the people on my FB joining in with it are the same people who love reality shows and read sensationalist articles in the DM and women’s mags, all of which contribute (IMO) to a culture of spite, and are about as far away as it’s possible to be from the idea of kindness.

CornishPorsche · 29/02/2020 12:05

The main thing that pisses me off is the sanctimonious shite related to it. The woman was being prosecuted for domestic violence. She clocked her SLEEPING partner round the head with a lamp.

She clearly had MH issues to lead to suicide, and it's sad, but virtue signalling and minimising DV is not acceptable.

I've said it before, and I'll keep saying it - if she were a man the papers would be joyful about his demise.

soundsystem · 29/02/2020 12:06

*I completely agree. I'm getting thoroughly fed up of her being brought into conversations that have literally nothing to do with her.

I'm sorry she did what she did. But it wasnt due to unkindness FFS. You dont hang yourself unless you have deep seated MH issues going on.
If simply being kind was the cure for all mental illness, our psych wards would all be closed by now.*

This

DippyAvocado · 29/02/2020 12:11

Yes it popped up on the Priti Patel thread. It is apparently not kind to give your opinion of a public figure who is most definitely not kind.

MonsteraDeliciosa · 29/02/2020 12:13

I am on MN a LOT. The only times I’ve seen CF mentioned on here were on threads that were specifically about her following her death, and this one Confused

VenusTiger · 29/02/2020 12:32

I understand @MadameBee - my FB timeline was full of hashtag be kinds - last week I posted an article about a British Veteran ending his own life - not one single response, not one!
It's hypocrisy, people hate it. I also don't agree with how people can stick labels all over the place and make out it's fixed a problem.

Sofonisba · 29/02/2020 12:54

Yeah I've not seen any mention of her since the actual "she's dead" threads. Weird.

Eckhart · 29/02/2020 12:56

OP, this thread is a bit like shouting at everybody for shouting.

Letsallscreamatthesistene · 29/02/2020 13:04

MN isnt real life though. Its full of posters portraying the perfect versions of themselves for fear of being ganged up on.

Whilst its a good message, its not a new one. I tend to cut through all the superficial rubbish these days.