To really hate being a control freak

[abitshitsorry]

I am a complete control freak. I don't know if thats the technical term for it but I am. Everything is my way, I barely trust other people o do jobs so I do them myself, my life is very regimented and I always know what I'm doing and when. I have no problems in my relationship or home life. I think DH likes it to be honest but as soon as something messes up I'm an anxious mess. Ie. A mouse in the kitchen at the moment. I haven't slept,I was cleaning until 2am and had to have an hour log bath at 2am when I'd finished, I feel on edge and unmotivated and it's anything like it, we had a leak in the sink a while ago, mess up with nursery. How do I stop it?

I think it’s probably a symptom of something deeper.
It could be that in your life (past or present) there was something that you can’t or couldn’t control so you go OTT on the things you can. Or maybe (as in my case) you exert control because you feel overlooked and unimportant and having people do things your way makes you feel that what you want and say matters to other people. The problem with that for me was that when people quite reasonably did things their own way rather than the way I preferred I took it as a rejection of me, as a judgement almost and I’d get disproportionately upset and angry.

Luckily for me and those around me, life took me down a path that lead to a lot of therapy and as a result of this I gradually lost the need to have so much control over my environment and everyone around me. I just wish I’d done it sooner in my life. I can thoroughly recommend it!