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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Postnatal Ward Hell

267 replies

MoneyM · 27/02/2020 01:47

AIBU in suggesting that postnatal wards are literally hell on earth? Baby born today - stuck in a room with snorers, loud texters, newborn babies being left to cry it out...not to mention the incessant succession of beeps and buzzers. And the intense heat!!

OP posts:
cookiemon666 · 28/02/2020 21:21

My first which was nearly 20 years ago, had a private room, was bloody lovely. Second and third elective sections, 4 bedded bay, strict visiting times, no issues. My 4th baby, he ended up in scuba, I was put in a bay with no baby, sharing with a women who had her baby with her. It was only when I had a meltdown that they moved me to my own room. Was so nice to close the door. And I waddled down to scbu every day

PixieDustt · 28/02/2020 21:27

I was lucky and it was very quiet.
SIL snored so bad they moved her to a private room!

TurquoiseDress · 28/02/2020 21:28

YADNBU!

Total hell on bloody earth!Angry

With DC2 I managed to get a private room, it was the best thing ever, such a different experience all round!

PixieDustt · 28/02/2020 21:28

Congratulations

Ticketybootoo · 28/02/2020 21:37

Could write a book about the horrendous hell of the experiences I have had in 2 London hospitals. However am an ex nurse and at the same time am grateful for 2 lovely daughters . Not sure that women get very good treatment during childbirth - frankly would take a loan out and go to the Portland if I did it all over again - my sanity is worth it 🤱🏻

bingbangbing · 28/02/2020 21:41

@Indella

Thank you for explaining. I was in for five days- to this day I have no idea why. Sad state of affairs all round.

Roomba · 28/02/2020 21:45

It's awful, isn't it? I was on a mixed antenatal/postnatal ward for over five weeks before and after I had DS1. 3. 5 weeks before, 2 weeks after. It gave me PTSD and I've never been so exhausted and helpless in my life. 24/7 noise, boiling hot, staff too busy to properly provide care. They were shocked my BP kept going up and up despite increasingly massive doses of medication.

Just the smell of the hand-wash they still use there made me shake and almost throw up when I had an appointment at that hospital for something else recently. And DS is 14 now.

Tobebythesea · 28/02/2020 21:45

I was in some ways lucky because my work health insurance covered private maternity. Not free though, still cost thousands.

Labour was brilliant, postnatal was not great. Felt ignored, everything was “in 5 minutes” (eg asking for pain relief) despite higher staff ratios.

Rizzoli123 · 28/02/2020 21:53

Both my children were two weeks late. During labour with the older one I got an infection and ended up with impetigo. I got so hot and sweaty as I was having iv antibiotics I pulled my canula out.

With the second he had a vontuse delivery. I went to the ward asked if I wanted anything to eat and was practically ignored for the rest of my time there. They spoke to everyone else on the ward but for some reason never spoke to me. I was there for four days. When I asked if I could go home the nurse said oh we are waiting as Dr wants to look at his head before he goes home but don't worry she will be roundayer. She never came. The next day she did and I said I have been waiting for you so I can go home. She said there was no need she wasn't due to come and see me and I could of gone home yesterday.

MotherofPearl · 28/02/2020 21:58

Gosh @Indella it's pretty shocking reading your post - I really do feel for the staff like you too. It sounds horrendously stressful.

Is a campaign the right solution? The problem seems to me to be one of resources and the wrong government.

nativityhumbug · 28/02/2020 22:09

I agree wit it being horrid but the comment about 'babies left to cry it out' made me wince! My ds2 was awake pretty much all night and I had quite a few nasty comments. At one point, another mum came in and when she saw me with ds2 in bed with me, said 'oh, I just wanted to check you weren't just asleep.'

OhTheRoses · 28/02/2020 22:10

I had a bad experience in 1994 MotherofPearl midwives complaining they were overworked. I had a brilliant experience in 1998 because I flounced out of the NHS mat dept and paid. There was no improvement whatsoever when Blair won in 97.

Whispers when ds was born in 94 the midwives whinged continually they were overworked. There were more middys on the post natal ward than women and they still couldn't provide adequate care - they were squealing at the nurses station and getting irritated if they were asked to do anything. C&W, London. Brilliant hospital, filthy bathrooms - I was handed green paper towels and ajax when I commented the bath was bloodstained. They had told me to have a bath. They were scoffing mince pies.

Atrocious. Everything to do with personal standards.

LouiseNordoff · 28/02/2020 22:12

Gosh, poor you. And congratulations on the birth of your baby! Bloody internet! I was lucky enough to have both of mine before mobiles were surgically attached to everyone (last one 15 years ago) hence quiet maternity ward, loads of help from the nurses with latching on and bathing etc and as it was a quiet weekend they let me stay for three nights. Really helped a new mum!

Sheldonoscopy · 28/02/2020 22:13

Only good thing about the postnatal ward for me was ordering a takeaway and my mate collecting from entrance and bringing to my private room. Midwives were amazed, never been done on their watch before. Highly recommend it! Shared some around too, we ordered far too much and the midwives were more than happy to keep me company when my friend left and one sent me to have a shower while she had a cuddle with ds in my room on hand in case I fell (spinal issues throughout pregnancy so she wasn’t willing to risk it)
I have to say, the midwives I encountered were absolutely amazing and an absolute credit to the profession. And I made sure I left feedback.

The wards however... nope. Ds1 I was on a ward and woke up hearing this baby crying nonstop and the mum was just ignoring the poor mite. I pressed the buzzer and a midwife came in and I said the lady wouldn’t comfort her baby. She checked my chart and said yeah you’ve had a lot of medication haven’t you? I’m all Hmm what’s that got to do with it??
She picks up my baby who has apparently been screaming this entire time Blush plops him on me and proceeds to show me how to have him latch Blush

In all fairness, the wards were hell, me aside, and when they popped me into a private room to allow for all sons medical needs to be met properly, I relaxed a lot better than I had in the days before on the ward

Toomuchtrouble4me · 28/02/2020 22:19

gosh yes - 4 times and c-sections so from 5 days with1&2, to 3 days with 3rd and 2 days with 4th. The heat and the bloody visitors - husbands couldn't stay all night when mine were born so it must be a total nightmare now.
Will totally make sure that my daughter gets good medical insurance before she has a sniff of a baby and gets her own room - bliss.

CatMuffin · 28/02/2020 22:23

Agree. It was absolute hell. We should not be treated like this.

YappityYapYap · 28/02/2020 22:27

It is horrible. One woman invited a camera crew in to take professional photos of her and her baby on the ward I was on. It was awful for the rest of us

peaceanddove · 28/02/2020 22:41

My experience was so horrible I am sure it directly contributed to my post natal anxiety afterwards. I was in a side room because of the C-section, but it and the en suite just weren't clean. My Mum rolled up her sleeves and bleached everything in sight. Food was vile, with soggy bread sandwiches and tepid water in the jug and it was stifflingly hot like living on the surface of the sun. Even in a side room it was just relentless noise and clamour 24/7. My buzzer was never answered and I couldn't even move off the bed because I was in so much pain after the C-section, and honestly didn't sleep for over 56 hours. In the end I was crying and nauseous because I was so exhausted. There's more but I just don't want to think about it.

My friend gave birth in a Spanish maternity hospital round about the same time. Own immaculate room and bathroom with double bed and comfy sofa. She had a section so she had all tasty meals brought to her room for first 3 days and she stayed in for a total of 6 days. Lots of 1-1 with midwife to establish BF. Nursing auxillary always in hand to cuddle baby when my friend had a shower. Babies taken to night nursery for several hours every night to make sure all Mums got some sleep. One of the Spanish nurses had worked in the NHS but told my friend she came back to Spain because she couldn't stand how filthy and chaotic our maternity wards were Blush

myfifyhun · 28/02/2020 22:48

Just been in for an op; four bedder; one lady with a nebuliser, one with advanced dementia slept all day, woke up at 9 pm and shouted all night, third elderly lady went to the loo in the middle of the night and fell and broke her hip.
It's not just in maternity you get these problems, I discovered!

Allthebiscuits · 28/02/2020 22:50

I remember being woken up to be asked whether I'd like a cup of tea. Followed by a midwife telling me it was really important to rest and get some sleep as much as I could. It all felt like a cruel joke. Also trying to learn to breastfeed a tongue tied newborn with us sporting cannulas a was not a challenge I was ready for. I remember watching the midwife expressing my milk for me in a detached daze winding why no one had mentioned this before...

Sewingbea · 28/02/2020 22:53

Awful. I had a planned home birth for my second DC. And one of the big joys of that was eating a bacon sandwich in my own bed an hour after the birth, followed by a night in my own bed.

maa1992 · 28/02/2020 22:53

I completely agree, hated it!!!!

JuanSheetIsPlenty · 28/02/2020 23:06

My friend gave birth in a Spanish maternity hospital round about the same time. Own immaculate room and bathroom with double bed and comfy sofa. She had a section so she had all tasty meals brought to her room for first 3 days and she stayed in for a total of 6 days. Lots of 1-1 with midwife to establish BF. Nursing auxillary always in hand to cuddle baby when my friend had a shower. Babies taken to night nursery for several hours every night to make sure all Mums got some sleep. One of the Spanish nurses had worked in the NHS but told my friend she came back to Spain because she couldn't stand how filthy and chaotic our maternity wards were

So there must be a massive funding difference between U.K. and Spain (also France that someone mentioned upthread) we should be looking at how they achieve that and aiming for similar.

Tonkatol · 28/02/2020 23:56

For health reasons, I had all 4DC in hospital. Things changed so much in the 11 years between DC1 and DC4. My worst experience was after DC2. Born at 12.02 am, and having had an epidural, I had to stay until the morning. Firstly, I sent my husband home to bed about 1am and had baby in bassinette, drip in one arm and sick bowl in other hand, so couldn't move. Then, the healthcare assistant came to give me a wash - when I told her I was waiting to be stitched, she insisted I had already been stitched - after about 10 minutes of arguing, she went to get the midwive, who rushed in, apologising for the fact that I hadn't been stitched and the epidural wouldn't now be as effective.

Unfortunately, everywhere was full and so I ended up in the early delivery room (meant to be set up like a lounge area), along with two other ladies and their newborns. There was not a curtain or a bell between the three of us and one of the ladies was a teenager, it was her first and she was in shock and wouldn't stop crying. As it was part of the labour ward, there were no midwives free to come and see any of us. The following morning, I couldn't shower until my husband was around to look after baby and, due to paperwork and medication for the baby, we didn't get to leave until 2pm. Worst experience ever.

The same hospital now has single rooms throughout the hospital, including post natal. Whilst I would have definitely preferred this, there are now no communal areas in post-natal, so those that are there for several days don't get to mix with other new mums and, if they don't have many visitors, are totally alone with their baby for hours on end.

Legoandloldolls · 29/02/2020 00:02

Congratulations! YANBU. Its hell on earth. I have had four kids all high risk so about two months total on post natal wards. People shouting down their phones, TV full blast while they snore and baby cries. People pushing there chairs past your curtain space, noisy kids visiting, and that's just me ( kidding) but once I went home I was a bit scared to be away from my hourly checks and food bought to my bed. It's all worth it

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