To ask about your approaches to social media with your kids

[littleblackdress04]

DS is 12 (a young 12) and keeps asking for Instagram and I have said a flat no. I have explained that I don’t think it’s very healthy for kids to be on it, he’s too young (age limit is at least 13 I think) and talked to him about it - talked about online bullying etc.

He’s got WhatsApp on the condition that I am allowed to read the threads etc- he uses it mostly to share Star Wars pics & arrange to meet in the park & I haven’t seen anything negative on there.

Now there is tic toc that I know nothing about & he’s asking for that too. My response is likely to be no again- I just feel he doesn’t need any of it really.

Aibu? What approach do you take? I just want to keep him safe from all the toxic crap of social media ultimately & am trying to talk to him about it as much as I can

DS is 12, has WhatsApp (under same conditions as you've got with your DS), Instagram (with private account on condition that myself, his dad and his 16 year old cousin all follow him) and TikTok (on restricted mode both in terms of content and time allowed on there - 60mins in his case).

The rules we have with DS for his phone is general is that he has absolutely no expectation of privacy until he's 16 years old. i.e. we know the password for his phone, and will pick it up whenever we like and look through everything on there.

Following with interest as I have two 11 year olds due to start secondary in September. Thus far they only have WhatsApp and a lengthy group chat with school friends that they’re totally happy for me to check.

I’m expecting that they’ll want more in the not too distant future.

A flat no is fine.

He’s 12 and a child. I think we’ve lost a sense of being able to just say “no and that’s the end of it”

When I was younger and my parents said no I had to accept it. I’m 35 btw and not 90.

My two boys, aged 13 and 15 have had Instagram for a while now, they don't post anything on it, they use the messaging side of it for chatting with friends, same way I use WhatsApp and Messenger.

Maybe ask him why he wants it. If he wants it to chat with like my boys, then it's no different to WhatsApp.