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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Getting a cleaner or let dp moan into eternity

29 replies

Lunafortheloveogod · 23/02/2020 17:51

We’re due dc2 very soon, I’ll have two under 1. Before I hit the completely beached whale side of pregnancy I managed to keep the house mostly clean with dp doing dinner dishes n weekend cleaning type stuff.. anything I ask for a hand with and general stuff off his own back.

Obviously now I get knackered quicker so I don’t do as much, not dirty just clutter can live longer and the hoover won’t die if it’s not switched on type of changes. He moans a bit but he’s always been one for nothing on surfaces etc.. and mil likes to nip his ear.

My parents can’t manage to take both kids to baby sit regularly, health wise and simply they don’t get much time off work for them. I wouldn’t ask them to either. But they’ve offered as we don’t need a baby gift to pay for a cleaner to come once a week n help run round the place so I don’t need to stress while the new babies a typical won’t go down newborn and ds is being well ds. I thought it was a great offer, I’d coordinate it for a day I was in if that worked best or I’d go to a baby group for the few hours to give her peace.

Now we’re talking kitchen, bathroom, living room, hoovering kind of clean not gutting every room just to keep the house running till I’m on my feet.

DP is horrified obviously.. why would we need one! They’d go through our stuff! They steal! My
mother never had one and she had us two (bigger age gap).. blah blah blah.

Dm and me have two ideas.. cleaner comes when he’s at work and he’ll never know.
Or
I wait till he’s moaning his face off, ideally infront of MIL, and state dp’s offered to get us a cleaner.. so he can physically see how ridiculous he’s being.

It’s the same cleaner they use so she doesn’t steal or raid through everything.

Should I let him moan?
Or should I get a secret cleaner?
Or should I get the cleaner and a patio?

Why are men such awkward beasts.

OP posts:
Whynosnowyet · 23/02/2020 18:33

Cleaner here... One of my customers lives alone but has very critical dps...
Once I had to hide in a cupboard when his df called round!!
Tell dh matter of factly you have organised a cleaner to come on x day.
Unless he is prepared to do it all himself.

Haggisfish · 23/02/2020 18:34

Get a cleaner-best thing I EVER did!!

Lunafortheloveogod · 23/02/2020 19:12

I’ve told him he’s mad lol, fortunately dm has agreed to keep the offer open until the muppet of a man realises the physical work involved with two kids.

I had thought about the sneaky cleaner coming early on, mil has just moved 2 hours away I swear I didn’t dance so she’ll never be here early. But then he’d think I really am superwoman managing it all myself n more than I did with ds lol.

She just harps on about clutter to him, she hates it, couldn’t do with it.., blargh (then buys 3 bags of toys n clothes for ds). She won’t say it to my face or she’d be handed a duster.

He just harps on about stuff being everywhere, we need more storage, we need to have a clear out, i need to xyz (normal task) it’ll take 2hours!

He spent way too long in a big empty house.. now it’s really not empty lol, he also refuses to put things in the loft because it’s not floored so you obviously would break the beams that have survived 70 years with a duvet an a Christmas tree.

Thankfully this pregnancy has been 100 times easier than the first, hg n spd with pre eclampsia at the tail so the fact I’ve got heart burn n a sore backs like a cake walk Grin

OP posts:
BigSandyBalls2015 · 23/02/2020 19:36

Part time @ 60 hours a week Shock

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