I won't let my grandmother babysit my son

[power0901]

My son is now 6 months old he does go to daycare(we love the daycare, the staff is amazing and i comfortably trust them with my son) but due to my fiancee being inbetween jobs and going to school he only goes 2 days a week to day care and then every Friday he goes to my FIL. When my fiancee returns back to work I know my grandmother will once again ask to have a day to babysit but i do not feel comfortable with allowing her for multiple reasons:
1.) her house is often unclean(food not being cleaned up, toys everywhere, never getting swept/mopped)
2.) She has my niece most of the day where other people babysit twice a week to give my grandma a break
3.) my sister lives there and can be there and i dont trust her around my son in any manner
4.) if she falls she cant get up on her own and my son has the tendency to hold his breath when he freaks out and needs help breathing again(its a family issue)
5.) i am not close with my family and keep a distance due to many issues between them and my inability to accept the way the act 90% of the time
However, when ever he is sick she throws digs blaming the daycare and it bothers me greatly. Am i being unreasonable by not letting her babysit.

It sounds like she is totally unsuitable for childcare.

Is this for real?! Of course she’s totally unsuitable to watch your son! How is this even a question? The only thing not on that list is ‘Oh also, she’s Pennywise’ and Paimon lives with her.

There's no reason at all to leave your son with her. The only reason you mentioned - which is not even a positive - is that she (not you) criticises day care.

Just say no. Doesn't sound suitable to me

Think you are doing the right thing personally. I wouldn't leave my child there.

You'd be irresponsible to agree to her having him alone.

Perfectly reasonable to say to her you of course want her to see him but it needs to be with you there for everyone's best interests.

You're only being unreasonable to think you might be being unreasonable!

She’s got a lot on her plate already, I can’t see the family creating a big ruckus over you saying ‘no thanks’ to childminding at her place.

You can always say you’re thinking of her health, rather than his.

I say this because 2 things seem clear from your post, OP. You have already decided he won’t be spending significant time there, and you’re feeling guilty/fearful about family fallout when you tell them.

Go with your instincts. You feel this way for good reason.

Your child, your rules. If there's someone who you don't want to babysit your child, relatives or not, then they don't get to babysit. Just say no and if it's brought up again just change the subject.