I do not want my sister to be my sons godmother

[power0901]

I need to pick a godmother for my son and i have an older sister who i do not want to pick. I am the godmother of her daughter. However, we are not close in any way. Most days I rather not deal with her. I do not like how she parents, nor do i trust her alone with my son. As well i do not like the way she acts, shes often loud, rude, and uncaring. I do not want her to be the godmother but i know this will upset her and cause tensions. I am unsure what to do at this point. I have a few other options that i am close with and i trust with my son. Should i feel bad for not being willing to pick my sister?

Traditionally I think it’s two godmothers and a godfather for a girl and two godfathers and a godmother for a boy.

I had mum's brother as his wife as godpzrents. She hadn't wanted them But they pushed her. My brother's had GPS who were not related. On the one hand, my brother's GPS were more interestin g, fun and gave better presents, but on the other hand we never lost touch with mine, as we did with theirs.

In your pkace, choose the ones you want not the ones who want.

Going against the grain a bit here, but I would choose your sister (to keep the peace) and your cousin and your BIL, but name the ones you would actually want to have look after your child should the worst happen in your will (and not mention this to your sister).

I actually wouldn't name your BIL's girlfriend, as they aren't even married and they may not end up together long term. One of my godmothers is a friend my parents had at the time, but neither I nor they have heard from her in 35 years, so to me is a bit pointless! At least with family, you know you won't (usually!) lose touch.

I offer the opposing scenario :

My sister will be christening her child this year.

I don't want to be the godmother.

She has a goddaughter she will ask but may additionally try and include me, largely for appearance.

I regret not refusing to be her bridesmaid years ago, which was again done for appearances sake.

We don't get on at all, but refusing the offer if it is made will be taken as a huge slight.

I don't even want to attend the christening due to being NC with my father.

So tricky.

Is your sister SET on being Godmother?

@EineReiseDurchDieZeit
I am unsure if shes set on it as i have not spoke to her about it.
However, my sister as largely made anything she can about her and she won't be in the spot light which i know will bother her greatly. I have been focusing on asking my cousin that i grew up with and close with as we see each other monthly at the minimum and i feel more comfortable with her.

If you don't want to have her as a god mother then you don't have too but as you are godmother to her child it might upset her a little but she will get over it and as you won't be having much contact with her anyways in the future you won't have anything to worry about.

When my DB got my DN christened , I thought maybe I would be asked to be a godmother being my db only sister and my other db to be godfather but it wasn't to be I was just met with "blood is thicker than water", his ex has 2 sisters and she asked her youngest sister to be godmother which upset her other sister. But I wasn't too fussed and didn't have him for my ds god father. He doesn't see any of the people he chose to be godparents now and there not even in his son's life. We however are all still in my dn life.

Ask your cousin first, and then announce it in a benign way, such as over a family group What's App, or in mixed company so that she can't have a childish reaction without embarrassing herself.

I'd have said noone. Godparent bears no resemblance on who would have your child in the cause of parental deaths.

But your oh has asked.....

Your cousin will create waves as your oh has chosen their sibling and you're sidelining yours.

I'd speak to your parents first. See how they think it will go down and best approach before you speak to cousin.