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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

AIBU when staying in someone’s house.........

45 replies

Pinkponiesrock · 19/02/2020 00:52

To go to bed and watch films after putting child to bed?

Have dinner together all together, cooked by hosts then guests put child to bed at 7pm, then each have a shower, then disappear into bedroom to watch a film, reappear for a cup of tea then go to bed.

This is every night,” not just a one off and on different occasions.

Am I missing something here? is this normal guest behaviour?

OP posts:

StoppinBy · 19/02/2020 02:02

If it was family I would be pleased that they were out of my hair for the night.

If it were my friends I would be wondering what was wrong and thinking it was very odd.

Monty27 · 19/02/2020 02:05

They may not be imposing on your privacy: tick
Neither are they staying because they like spending time with you

AutumnCrow · 19/02/2020 02:06

They don't sound like a barrel of laughs.

So they wash up? Help?

AcrossthePond55 · 19/02/2020 02:10

On one hand it's rude. On the other I'd be delighted to not have to be 'on' every evening, chatting and entertaining guests.

Pilot12 · 19/02/2020 02:11

Maybe they don't like what you watch on TV or they want to be close to their child, it wouldn't bother me, I'd be glad not to have to entertain them!

Italiangreyhound · 19/02/2020 02:44

It's really rude behaviour. If it's Guests (plural) why does it take more than one person to put child to bed, why are they not helping with washing up etc?

thelonggame · 19/02/2020 02:50

I love it when guests go to their room early and we get our evenings to ourselves.
I need time on my own or just with my DH to decompress at night and relax, maybe they are the same?

heartsonacake · 19/02/2020 03:28

Well, what exactly is it you want them to do? Come and sit with you every evening?

Oldfail · 19/02/2020 04:07

How old is the child? Are they in the same room as the parents?

Just thinking if is a 1 year old and they havent got a monitor and there is no stair gate they might not want to leave them alone.

tobee · 19/02/2020 04:25

Depends whether I liked the guests or not really!

Longdistance · 19/02/2020 04:34

Sounds like they’re using your home like a hotel. Do you live somewhere touristy?

HarryElephante · 19/02/2020 04:40

Maybe you're boring.

But, why do they come and stay? Do they do something in the area? Are they family?

You've not given a lot of info to make a informed decision. I have voted YABU, based on what you have said so far.

Apolloanddaphne · 19/02/2020 04:42

Is it relatives or friends? I wouldn't find it odd if a sibling or adult child did this in my home. I would probably find it odd and a bit rude if friends did it.

Verily1 · 19/02/2020 04:44

It is odd yes.

Guests you would expect to be sociable.

If they are tired and want an early night so be it but the coming back for tea- that’s weird!

MinnieMountain · 19/02/2020 06:50

I'd be annoyed because it sounds like they're using you as a hotel.

If they just did it on the odd evening and spent time with you during the day it would be different.

FlamingoAndJohn · 19/02/2020 07:30

It’s that they come 5/6 times a year I find odd.

So the come to stay, during they day go off and do their own thing then in the evening they eat dinner with you and bugger off after that? If I go and stay with a friend then I am there to visit them. I want to spend time with them. Not use their house like a hotel.

I think your guest bedroom needs redecorating, that’ll stop it for a month or two if you time it right.

BottleOfJameson · 19/02/2020 07:35

If they were staying just one night maybe it would be a bit odd but I think for a longer stay once you've spent the evening together having dinner it's nice to all have some down time. My guests do sometimes just crash out on front af the telly (there's one on the guest room) and I think we all appreciate a bit of time alone.

maddening · 19/02/2020 07:38

Next time they ask point them to a hotel, say that you really don't get the feeling that they are visiting you rather than using your home as a cheap hotel.

CodenameVillanelle · 19/02/2020 07:38

They aren't actually visiting you then, just using you for free accommodation! I'd be 'busy' next time they request to come

Damntheman · 19/02/2020 09:06

It's not normal and it's very rude! One of the nights, maybe, with prior agreement and talk about the plan. But not every night, wow. They're using you as a hotel and I'd not let them stay again.

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