Anxiety hand hold needed

[Unusualusernames]

posting here for traffic...sorry

Just wondering if anyone has any helpful tips. I'm off work for half term with a teenager. I suffer badly with anxiety (health anxiety in particular) which is more manageable when I'm at work distracted.

I've started to dread time off work because my anxiety rears it's ugly and I don't know what to do about it.

I've tried cbt, meditating, cbd oil. I've been offered citalopram but I'm too scared of it. I just feel useless and frightened.

Please don't flame me or be horrible because I'm feeling super sensitive.

You need to keep busy to stop your mind from thinking these things. What do you have planned this week?
How old is your teenager? Are they planning on seeing friends or are you hoping to do stuff together?
I’m off this week with a teenager too - I’m planning a mix of doing stuff with him to dropping him off at friends and doing stuff for myself.

Why not plan some fun things with your teenager? Make them your focus and distraction. Do a few outrageous things just because you can.
The activities would have to be dependent on the age and probably sex of your child. Surprise them by going for it and showing them they are more important than fretting. If working can distract you I’m sure doing something nice with your child can too.

Ooh, I've been signed off sick for 6 weeks because of anxiety, and health anxiety in particular is doing my head in. So you're not the only one! My stressful job made it worse so I'm taking this time to research methods to manage anxiety. I have taken up learning guitar and it keeps my mind occupied because I'm constantly trying to stretch my fingers so I'll be able to play the C chord.

I was prescribed pregabalin for fibromyalgia and anxiety last year and for about six months it worked a treat. Overnight my anxiety was gone and I was delighted! But it came back so I'm tapering off unfortunately. My doctor recommended different online sources and apps, and I'm going to try Headspace, or maybe the Be Mindful app that is listed on the NHS website. Have you tried any apps yet? I think some are designed to help you "rewire" your brain. Not sure how effective they are but I'm giving it a go. Hope you find something that works! Anxiety sucks.

She's 13 and going through this stage where she literally doesn't want to do anything with me. She barely speaks to me which makes me feel like a crap parent.

I hide my anxiety from her but I worry that I've affected her in a way by being like this (it started soon after she was born and I think it's triggered by the fact my dad died suddenly when I was 7). I think she's perfectly happy but I feel like I'm doing everything wrong and I feel guilty.

I know this sounds very self pitying and there's people with much worse problems but I just feel awful.

Hi @PonderTweek I've tried headspace in the past and I found it quite calming.

Health anxiety is the worst. I've just finished anti biotics for a suspected uti and I'm overthinking like nobody's business. It's so frustrating because I've been a lot better with the health anxiety lately and I just feel like I've taken a big step backwards. I stupidly started googling yesterday. I'm so angry with myself.

@PonderTweek I hope you get through this ♥️

I’ve been through this Op, I found walking pretty good to physically & mentally burn myself out. That’s what you need to do burn yourself out everyday with keeping busy. I used to be awful you have my sympathy

It really does ruin your days, you can’t find enjoyment in anything when your having an episode. I hope your okay x

I sympathise op. Firstly I would say think about giving the meds a try. They can be a massive help and any side effects are usually very mild and short lived. I think everyone I've spoken to who is on medication for anxiety/depression has said they had the prescription for weeks/ months before actually taking them because they were just so scared, but that they made the biggest difference when they did bite the bullet and give them a try.

Like you I'm usually much better when I'm busy and in routine. I find school holidays are a real flare up time for my anxiety. Plan in at least one self care thing each day. Things I enjoy are going to a coffee shop either with my kindle or a friend, baking something lovely as a treat for after tea, going for a walk by myself with a good podcast to listen to, going for a wander round the shops and perhaps buying myself something small as a treat.

One thing that helps me is reminding myself that I'm not alone. When you're suffering from anxiety I think it's easy to feel very lonely, to imagine that everyone else has a stress free, worry free life. But you never know what's going on under the surface. You aren't alone. Most people feel like you are at some time in their lives. This isn't how you'll be forever, it will pass.

I know you said your teen doesn't want to spend time with you but my teens can always be lured out by promises of food! Would your dd not be tempted by a lunch out or a cake and coffee/hot chocolate?

You'll get through this op. Be kind to yourself. Make the effort to get out of the house every day. Have you got someone you trust who you could talk to about how you're feeling? If not, vent here, we'll hold your hand.

How has today been op? What did you do?

I too have a 13 yr old and I find that a mix of doing stuff with them and letting them do their own thing is a good balance -
So one day this week take them shopping for a couple of new tops, maybe go to a different shopping centre than your usual one. Get a milkshake/hot choc or McDonald’s. That’s enough.
Another day drop them off at friends, then tackle the ironing with the radio on. Or tidy the junk drawer!!
Ask them to help you bake a cake - or you bake it and get them to decorate it. Or buy biscuits to ice if baking is not your thing.

Sometimes it’s just finding little things to do - to keep you busy until bedtime.

My general propensity for anxiety has settled into health phobia (and a few others that are more easily managed). It's a bitch, it really is.

OP, take the antidepressants. Seriously, they're a literal lifesaver. They'll give you space in which to revisit your toolkit of methods to help you with the anxiety, i.e what your CBT taught you.

Anxiety (and depression) are irrefutably linked to low serotonin levels. The antidepressants will correct this and free you from the worst of your catastrophising. Trust me. Been there, done it, got the t-shirt.

As for non-drug techniques, distraction is the most useful, as is 'thinking beyond' (my own term) if you're anxious about a particular test or results. If I'm waiting on a medical appointment, then obviously my anxiety will be a its peak. Life literally stops. I try to think beyond the event. I try to think 'this time next Friday (i.e. after the appointment), it will all be over and normal life will resume.

It's also useful for me to remember that my thoughts and feelings are a symptom of my phobia. I can ignore them if I want, accepting them is also useful. What I don't need to do is give them any more headspace. I just acknowledge them as inevitable and then try to distract myself.

Stay away from google. No good comes of googling symptoms. You will literally contract cancer from your keyboard.