to not want my husband to help as it just creates more work.

[michie40]

I have a lovely DH who does his best to help around the house. However he just seems incapable of seeing any mess he creates or completing any task properly. For example when bathing the two LO he dumps towels on the floor and the clothes are left in heaps in the bathroom (presumably for our "house elves" to remove). The kitchen surfaces are wiped but not dried and shoes are left randomly around the house for people to trip over. Dirty nappies are also left under the bed, in the hall or on the stairs in piles. It would just be simpler and quicker if I did it all. I know I sound like a moany old bag - but am I the only one with a DH or DP like this?

You do realise they do it on purpose to envoke exactly that response from you?

No you aren't the only one. I think they genuinely don't "see" the mess.

rod for your own back.

you have to say - move that shitty nappy you fucking DIRTY BASTARD

Did wonder if he was doing it on purpose - he is normally quite bright so you would think he would realise abandoned nappies don't move themselves.

i have the same problem. it is like 'why cant you finish the task in hand please'? if i nag i feel guilty as he is always home from a v busy job by 5.50 to help with bathtime but why should i always finish off everything?!! i totally understand. i put up with it as it is important for the kids to spend time with their father so if i have to put in some extra clearing up then that is just life i suppose!

Dangerous road to go down doing it all yourself..end up bitter and resentful years down the line. Yes it is easier sometimes, but practice makes slightly less bad

Agree with you nowwearefor. I am currently a SAHM and kind of see the housework as my side of bargain. But I am also caring for two little people and feel there should be some help from his side - but when he tries it just creates more problems. I am reluctant to point out the really annoying stuff he does as I am afraid I will sound like a nagging hag - but why are men incapable of cleaning bathrooms properly? Cleaning the toilet is really not that complicated!

they are not incompeteant - they just can't be arsed - why do it if someone else is going to do it?

i think i err on the side of 'man'kind when i say - i would rather do almost anything else than tidy up

just have to remind them from time t time - that its not exactly your idea of fucking fun either.

They mean well but I agree with you abou the finishins thing. Our house is swathed in dry laundry, he can put it in the washer and hang it out (at a push) but the elves fold it, sort it, and put it away. Sometimes there are 3 loads worth scattered round the place, I can feel my head exploding!!

As fpr being a SAHM and that being your side of the bargain, I've done both and am now a working Mum which is by FAR the easier option when it comes to physical, emotional and intellectual labour. Entertaining kids is the most labour intensive thing in the World share the chores!