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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

To ask for advice on correcting speech?

25 replies

user1471433387 · 12/02/2020 15:07

DD (2 3/4) puts the word "no" in front of sentences rather than using can't or don't etc. Examples include:
No I like my dinner (she means I don't like my dinner)
No I can find my shoes (I can't find my shoes)
No it's the weekend (it isn't the weekend)

She can say the word "don't" as she says "I don't know" but just doesn't know how to use it when constructing her own sentences. I know it isn't a big issue but she's been doing it for over six months now! I can understand what she means but when she is communicating with other people it can cause a problem.
Would you like some pizza?
DD: No I like pizza.
Here have some then.
DD: No I like it!

Any advice on how to change this as I'm just not seeing any improvement.

OP posts:

Net123456 · 12/02/2020 15:32

Everytime she says something wrong just repeat it back to her in the correct way so when she says "No I like pizza" you say "You don't like pizza?", " No It's the weekend" = "No it's not the weekend" etc. Hopefully she'll soon start saying it correctly

plonkie · 12/02/2020 15:34

That's so cute :-). Yeah like above poster said, just feel confirm with the right wording and they'll soon pick it up. Adorable though!

1066vegan · 12/02/2020 15:59

Agree with the others that modelling the correct sentence structure is the way to go. If you ignore it then she won't understand her mistakes; if you correct her and make her repeat what she said in standard English then she could start to become self-conscious and reluctant to speak.

NoMorePoliticsPlease · 12/02/2020 16:02

Dont correct her , just say "You dont like pizza?" to show you have understood what she means without telling her she is wrong

alexdgr8 · 12/02/2020 16:37

i wouldn't worry.
it's more important that she speaks.
she's still very young. leave her be.

alexdgr8 · 12/02/2020 16:41

sounds rather glaswegian.
are you scottish

youareacuntychops · 12/02/2020 16:43

sounds rather glaswegian.
are you scottish

Does it?

Agree with others, repeat the sentence back to her correctly.

GlamGiraffe · 12/02/2020 16:48

That's a perfectly normat way for a child of her age to speak in my experience of 7 children. As other have said just repeat back the correct wording ie no you dont like pizza. Your child is communicating well which is important. Rmhlish is an extremely complicated language and takes a while for children to fully grasp. It will come. In the meantime, read to her a lot and talk to her all the time it will help with language development. Overall I wouldnt overly worry.

5zeds · 12/02/2020 16:50

Model the right sentence without sounding critical.

UnaCorda · 12/02/2020 17:08

Rmhlish is an extremely complicated language

That's probably why so few people speak it.

Mummyscrewedup · 12/02/2020 17:10

Just repeat it correctly. Don't draw attention to it just keep modelling

FithColumnist · 12/02/2020 17:12

I studied first language acquisition at University, and I can reassure you that your DD’s speech is entirely normal for her age. Correcting her will make no difference, nor will modelling the “correct” grammar in the short term. As her “internal grammar” develops she’ll start producing the standard form entirely naturally without prompting. It’s really nothing to worry about!

Daffodil101 · 12/02/2020 17:14

I’m a speech and language therapist. The advice you’ve been given here is correct.

ElfCakes · 12/02/2020 17:20

My DS is 2 and a half and I could have written this exact post about him

caulkheaded · 12/02/2020 17:25

Model correct language.

My god daughter at that age would say “please may can I have xyz”. She’s now 18 and has grown out of it (sadly)

donquixotedelamancha · 12/02/2020 17:46

sounds rather glaswegian

Surely that would be 'No fuckin' way I can find my shoes'?

Khione · 12/02/2020 18:58

My daughter at that age used to refer to herself and her brother as 'you two'. As in
'Can you two have a biscuit?' I actually thought it was rather clever.

Original poster

user1471433387 · 14/02/2020 16:04

Many thanks everyone. I do want to avoid sounding critical. I'm definitely not concerned now!

I am, however, becoming extremely worried about my 13 month old. I thought in the past she said a couple of words (hi and bye used appropriately) but this only lasted a couple of weeks. I know not having words at this age isn't a big issue but it is the fact she pretty much only has one sound: duh. Occasionally she may say something else such as: eeee or eee-eee. There's no babbling AT ALL! She doesn't try and talk. Most days the only noise would be: duh.

A few weeks ago I dropped something and said uh-oh, can you say uh-oh and she said it very clearly! Then the next day when we were in the car she said uh-oh about five times. This has not been repeated since.

She also spits out the majority of her drink not sure if this is related.

Should I be worried?

OP posts:

Original poster

user1471433387 · 14/02/2020 16:06

@Khione That's really sweet

OP posts:

1066vegan · 14/02/2020 16:14

For a 13 month old, I'd be more worried if they weren't understanding language than if they weren't producing sounds.

I remember taking my dd to her friend's 2nd birthday party (only a couple of weeks between the 2 of them). The friend greeted us by speaking in full sentences; my dd was saying a couple of words. It's hard to remember back, but I don't think she was even babbling much at 13 months. There's such a huge range of what is "normal".

I had the odd moment of panic (health visitor even offered us support for her delayed speech at one point), but kept telling myself that it was ok because I knew that she understood a lot (she responded to my language and we did baby signing).

By the time she started school, you would never have known that she was a late talker. She's now doing A Levels and doesn't shut up!

I wouldn't worry about either of your dd's.

Original poster

user1471433387 · 14/02/2020 16:27

Thanks @1066vegan I can be a bit of a worrier. I'm not sure that she does understand much though. I did try "testing" her this morning and saying let's go and get your sister up, where is she? And she pointed in the right direction. Later I asked her to point to an object which she should know, but she didn't. She's always been a lot less alert than her older sister and doesn't seem to know what is going on!

OP posts:

1066vegan · 14/02/2020 16:47

Later I asked her to point to an object which she should know, but she didn't

Worth keeping an eye on then, but not necessarily anything to worry about. It might be that she didn't recognise the name for the object; on the other hand it might just have been that she wasn't interested in pointing to it.

Maybe chat to her normally most of the time so that she gets used to speech patterns, the rhythm of language etc but use really short simple sentences and slow your speech down a little bit if you want to be sure that she's understanding the words you are saying. Giving simple choices could also help to check if she understands you in a meaningful context eg if dressing a doll, put 3 or 4 things on the floor and then touch the doll's head and say "Poor doll - cold head! Where's her hat?"

Original poster

user1471433387 · 15/02/2020 16:02

I really don’t think she has much understanding. For example, this morning I said we’re going outside let’s put your shoes on. She completely ignored me. I asked again and she did walk over to the shoe rack and get her shoes but her sister was putting her shoes on so she might just have just been copying her. I asked her to pass me my shoes and she just passed me another pair of her own shoes.

I’ve also noticed there’s very little eye contact, maybe just a quick glance every couple of hours. Not sure if this is normal.

OP posts:

NewName54321 · 15/02/2020 16:46

With the younger child, is she hearing properly?
Otherwise, is she better when you say her name first so you get her attention? She might just need a little more processing time than you are used to giving her sister.

Apple23 · 15/02/2020 16:59

"My" and "your" are quite difficult concepts because they change who they refer to, according to who is speaking.

So, when you say "my shoes" you mean the pair that you own. When another person says "my shoes", they mean a different pair - the ones that belong to them.

Try saying "Mummy's shoes" or "Katie's (or whatever her name is) shoes" to make it clear.

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