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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Walking vs driving kids to school

458 replies

OpportunityKnocks · 12/02/2020 13:27

I've seen a few rants about traffic on local Facebook pages.

Every single time there is someone who says 'well, if the parents walked their children the half mile to school then we wouldn't have this problem' with an inference that parents are lazy.

Well, actually, people usually drive because it is quicker, just like they drive to work because it's quicker than walking or public transport.

Parents, like the rest of the population have stuff to do. It wound me up because a lot of comments were targeted at parents that don't work. I'm currently on mat leave and drive DS to/from preschool. I have other reasons why I drive him aside from time, but that's irrelevant. Why is my time any less valuable than someone who has to go to work? That half a mile is a 40 minute round trip walking vs a 20 minute round trip driving.

So AIBU to call these people out on blaming parents for traffic?

OP posts:
veryvery · 13/02/2020 21:03

So I did a 40 minute round trip twice a day. Good for keeping trim.Smile I run everyday now and usually do a walk of at least half an hour as well. You get used to it.

OpportunityKnocks · 13/02/2020 21:09

I have a wonderful single but I'd need a double. Brisk walking/running whilst baby wearing is definately not safe, especially for me. The route does not allow for a side by side and I've not seen an up and over buggy that would accommodate a preschooler. Do up and over specific running buggys even exist?

OP posts:
veryvery · 13/02/2020 21:13

I don't know, you'd have to research it. You could always carry baby in a sling and push the buggy.

veryvery · 13/02/2020 21:16

Oh I see you don't get on with that. It would be worth researching alternative slings and buggies, though. Even a bike with a trailer if there is a safe route.

Frazzled2207 · 13/02/2020 21:20

Haven't read the full thread

We all need to walk more and use cars less for both carbon emissions and air quality reasons(the latter is particularly pertinent because school run traffic is often very slow which makes it even worse). There will always be a proportion of school running parents who have to drive due to distance, need to be at work at 9.15 am etc however in urban areas the vast majority of others should be walking IMO.

Would your child go on a scooter? This speeds up our school run enormously.

DontMakeMeShushYou · 13/02/2020 21:23

@Opportunityknocks

Let me just put this here again:

Perhaps you would do better to make your own choices without needing validation from strangers on the internet. Personally I think it is very lazy to drive when you could walk but we live in a free country so you can make that choice regardless of what I think. Your problem on this thread is that you wanted people to pat you on the head and validate your choices and your miffed because they haven't. If you don't like people thinking that your lazy, either ignore them and carry on or make the relevant changes to your lifestyle. But do stop trying to garner sympathy. You clearly don't care enough about clogging up the roads to walk instead of drive so don't expect other people to care if you're late for little Tabitha's baby yoga.

Look, stop flogging a dead horse. You clearly posted on here because you wanted everyone to tell you that you are completely justified to use your car for unnecessary journeys. Unfortunately, it turns out most people disagree with you. Endless whining that now everyone thinks your lazy and doesn't appreciate how precious your time is won't help change anyone's mind. As I said earlier, do what you want , own your own choices, and stop looking for approval from everyone else.

If you can't handle other people's disapproval, don't invite it.

OpportunityKnocks · 13/02/2020 21:26

I've done this but with an empty pram. Not easy, not very fast. Doable though.

I'd actually be very embarrassed pushing him this distance because it isn't far, it's just longer than it should be due to where it's situated... Crossroads, pedestrian crossings, main road with lots of crossing over the side roads. Having to stop at every road and do the whole 'don't forget to look both ways, is it safe to go? Then let's go.'

OP posts:
veryvery · 13/02/2020 21:30

I'd actually be very embarrassed pushing him this distance because it isn't far, it's just longer than it should be due to where it's situated... Crossroads, pedestrian crossings, main road with lots of crossing over the side roads. Having to stop at every road and do the whole 'don't forget to look both ways, is it safe to go? Then let's go.'

Don't be embarrassed. Should be more embarrassed about driving that distance.

veryvery · 13/02/2020 21:31

But if he gets used to walking it's a really good experience learning what he needs to do. Invaluable, I'd say.

BlueHarry · 13/02/2020 23:53

Someone asked why pedestrians get annoyed at people who drive for the school run. I do, only the ones who live in a reasonable walking distance to the school. People who live further away I understand why they'd drive. Many parents who I know that drive live closer to it than I do, l walk past their houses.

One reason I get annoyed is because me and my DD are breathing in the thick car fumes and I worry about this affecting my dd's lungs. Also I get annoyed because a lot of people park badly and dangerously, obstructing the pavements and making it difficult to walk down them. We have to cross a few roads and it can take ages because of the amount of cars driving the school run. I've also been clipped by the wing mirror of a car near the school because the driver (on the school run) was driving too close to the pavement.

Funnily enough just this week the school have now put big cardboard signs up all around the entrance asking drivers to be considerate to pedestrians and local residents because they've had so many complaints about the inconsiderate driving and parking. I will add I've never complained but I can understand why so many do.

BlueHarry · 13/02/2020 23:56

can imagine telling my nearly preschooler to get in the pram. What muscle group does pushing a pram with that kind of weight in affect? I'd be ripped

Mine did often when she was younger and I'm far from ripped. Sometimes she'd walk half of the journey and be in the pram for about half or something, some days she would just be in the pram. Since she got bigger she's always walked or been on her scooter.

DaveGrohlsMuse · 14/02/2020 00:00

OP you say you'd be embarrassed pushing him there is the pram because it's not that far but instead you choose to drive?! Don't you see how completely ridiculous that is? Confused

Permanentlyexhausted · 14/02/2020 00:21

In about 12 years time, when your son is knocked off his bike on the school run by a parent too fucking lazy to walk, and who thinks their time is so fucking important it is worth risking a child's life for, you might have a different opinion.

Just saying.

He's ok, thanks.

Lweji · 14/02/2020 04:57

Look for buggies with little platforms for the older child to stand on, rather than sit.
They're flexible and easy to hop on and off.

Natsku · 14/02/2020 05:25

I'd actually be very embarrassed pushing him this distance because it isn't far

But you're not embarrassed to drive that short distance??

Juliette20 · 14/02/2020 05:38

YANBU. While some criticism of parents is justified at time there is a lot of thinly veiled misogyny about the school run, both from men and internalised misogyny from other women. Lazy women, why don't they walk, can't drive, can't park, can't handle a big car, can't drive your husband's car, get out of the way for the Important Working People.

There is very little discussion, on the other hand, about why so many people are driving to work (or that many parents are doing both) or that some people going to work who are not dropping kids to school might be able to cycle, walk or get public transport.

thunderthighsohwoe · 14/02/2020 05:41

Because many parents have to rush straight off to get to work on time?

I have to drop DD off at the ILs daily. They live across our village - about a 40 minute walk - and I teach in the next village along. I drop DD off at 7.15 to get to school by 7.30,

Should I leave at 6 to walk her there in the dark and cold along roads with no pavements, to get back home on time to collect my car?

I’d love have the time to be able to take a bracing walk everywhere, but unfortunately one salary can’t pay the mortgage.

LolaSmiles · 14/02/2020 06:08

While some criticism of parents is justified at time there is a lot of thinly veiled misogyny about the school run, both from men and internalised misogyny from other women.
Please enlighten us as to how 'people should consider whether it's really necessary to drive for half a mile when walking is a perfectly viable alternative' is misogynistic.

Or are you taking the approach of claiming that any criticism of an action that happens to be performed by some women must be misogynistic?

ivykaty44 · 14/02/2020 06:10

When I used to drop dd2 for the school run , I had 15 minutes to get to work afterwards.

It was 30 minutes to walk or just under, 20 minutes to drive or longer, as needed to park etc & 12 minutes to cycle including licking bike right outside work

The council set up a “race from various points between bikes and cars - all from within 5 miles. Not one single driver arrived before the cyclist they’d been paired with.

I walk now to most of the sites I work at, I can easily have a driver pass me 5/6 times along route over a mile stretch

If I do cycle it’s still quicker than driving

In car congested towns bikes will always be faster, with bikes there is no need to break into a sweat and you can get extra seats, or scooter to school and then ride into work or back home

couchlover · 14/02/2020 06:13

Yabu and lazy. If more people walked short distances to school there would be less traffic which would make the journey for those who have to drive much faster.

We user to live a mile from kids school, still I walked even when I had a you get child. Allowing for waiting times at school and i hate to be late I was out of the house well over an hour twice a day but I did it.

We now live 3 miles away and I work full time so walking is out but we usually drop y6 dc off about a 15/20 min walk away and twice a week she walks to grandparents and we pick up from there. Even on the one night I pick up from school I do all I can to avoid going to school as its a nightmare so she meets me a street away.

MistyIsland · 14/02/2020 07:15

We Live rurally - school is 7 miles away, no way we could walk on unlit 60 mph roads with no footpaths.

I’d love to be able to walk the kids to school, unfortunately it’s just not going to happen any time soon.

I may see if we can cycle in the summer if I can find a safe route for them to do it.

FET2020 · 14/02/2020 07:28

Walk children to school. Stop being lazy and ruining the environment with your giant 4x4s.

HakunaMatataa · 14/02/2020 07:31

We walk in all weathers. I've a baby to. I've neighbours that drive and its quicker to walk. Annoying in the rain yes. But it saves me petrol. The agg for getting both DC in and out of the car and finding somewhere to park. Plus it's easier than finding parking. I like being able to walk. Looking forward to warmer days where we dont get wet in the process.

cologne4711 · 14/02/2020 07:32

Someone asked why pedestrians get annoyed at people who drive for the school run

I know that there are people near me who live maybe 10-15 mins walk away. But they drive, park in my road, leave the engine running and play on their phones until pick-up. I've seen people arrive 45 mins before pick-up. They're not doing it because they work, they are doing it because they're lazy and entitled (leaving their engines on REALLY annoys me).

They actually leave earlier to get a space than they would do if they walked! Completely mad.

cologne4711 · 14/02/2020 07:33

I may see if we can cycle in the summer if I can find a safe route for them to do it

Wouldn't it be great if we had the infrastructure for that?