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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To wonder how a school could get this so wrong

287 replies

Hingeandbracket · 11/02/2020 13:47

And not admit it.
www.google.com/amp/s/www.bbc.co.uk/news/amp/newsbeat-45521094
I am not quick to shout racist but this seems pretty clear cut.

OP posts:
ColaFreezePop · 11/02/2020 17:59

@Leflic afro hair can be tied back but it doesn't act like straight hair which is the point. Afro hair tends to grow up and out not down.

MitziK · 11/02/2020 18:02

Oh, God.

'Ruby, now 18, claims the school's head teacher Richard Brown told her that her hair was "too big".'

Or, in other words, the rest of the staff were quietly dying inside at the prospect of a wealthy white bloke ripping into a teenage girl for having hair characteristic of her ethnicity.

As long as it isn't full of nits or filthy dirty, there is absolutely no reason to comment upon any girl's hair other than to say it looks great. In those first two cases, it's relevant for safeguarding/potential neglect, with the latter, they spend enough time insecure about their appearance and being criticised for whatever they do/look like that actually saying something nice to them is all too rare for many.

Rules about make up and nails, along with particular rules about health and safety (such as in DT), fine. They affect girls of all ethnicities equally. But not hair. Not anybody's hair. It's part of them and I would no more say they have to make it straight, put tons of expensive product on, straighten or cut it than I would tell them they have to lose weight because their breasts or backside looks too big in their uniform.

BubblyBarbara · 11/02/2020 18:06

If the way a child’s hair grows naturally breaks the rule, then the rule is wrong

I’d we’d let him my DS hair would have been round his waist by the age of 14. Not appropriate for school though but maybe it is nowadays

LittleSweet · 11/02/2020 18:06

It quite clearly is discrimination. I can't see why she should have to tie her hair back. Her hair looks perfectly acceptable to me. I am white but not 'woke', iyswim. It's applicable to the Equality Act. Reasonable adjustments should be made in this case for the race of a child and her right to have her hair in it's natural form. Especially as other people have written tying afro hair back can be damaging to hair growth. She is protected by law.

feelingverylazytoday · 11/02/2020 18:11

Of course it was racist if the white girls were allowed to have their hair loose.
It is possible to have a 'hair' code that is applied equally and fairly to all pupils, one that takes into account different textures and different styling needs. The school just couldn't be bothered though. I suppose it was just easier to pick on one particular pupil and disrupt her education. Good for her for standing up to them.

EerieSilence · 11/02/2020 18:13

@BubblyBarbara - let's assume even with that length his hair would be "too tall and covering the view of the whiteboard for others", which was the school's argument.
You have to really admire Britain these days. Gone is the nice, accepting democratic face. It's back to the stiff upper lip, follow the rules, know your class and place and just march on.

1forsorrow · 11/02/2020 18:14

Why indeed? Provided it's safe and doesn't get in the way of learning, what does it matter what colour it is, how short or long it is, or whether it's up or down? And I'd be with you on that but I'm not with saying there can't be rules for black children because it is racist because it is the opposite of racist. Black children should follow the rules just like any other child so if there is a rule about tying long hair back then tie it back, if there is a rule about no "big" hair styles (white girls can have big hair as well you know) then no big hair styles.

I am far more annoyed about black children being written off.stereotyped as not being academic but really good at sport, my daughter failed with both of those as a very academic girl who couldn't catch a cold let alone a ball.

So there are fights I'd fight and fights I don't think are worth the bother.

WaxOnFeckOff · 11/02/2020 18:15

The whole rule about hair is stupid in the first place, but it disproportionately affects children with afro hair, children with afro hair are predominately black, ergo as well as being stupid, the rule (and/or the way it is being applied) is also racist. Not sure there is much more to understand.

rockingchaircandle · 11/02/2020 18:23

Yep, racist. Good on the young student for standing up for herself, but it's disgusting that it happened to her.

Even if there were no pain or financial implications (and I know there were) to her wearing other hairstyles, why should she?

Why is any authority still pushing the idea that natural afro hair is different, untidy or unprofessional?!

doritosdip · 11/02/2020 18:25

I bet 99% of the people shouting "racist" on here are "woke" white people (like the girls mother) who are conveniently ignoring the comments from reasonable black women explaining that actually they tie their 4c hair up just fine

The school rule is that Afro hair has to be tied back but European hair can be worn loose. Some kids with European hair have curls and frizz so the rule is racist and discriminatory.

The school rule should be about all types of hair and apply to both sexes.

Oulu · 11/02/2020 18:30

I can, actually, kind of see the argument re the board - it isn’t quite the same as a tall or fat child as it’s breadth as well as height.

But we can all see that it is not as wide as the torso of, say, an averagely fit and tall boy of a similar age.

Oulu · 11/02/2020 18:34

I do feel sorry for the girl. Her mother chose to make this into a huge battle with the school and keep her child home during her important GCSE years, rather than just tie her hair back like the hundreds of other black students at that school do everyday.

How do you know what "hundreds of black students in that school do every day"? Even if they do tie their hair back, the fact that they may choose to comply with a blatantly discriminatory rule does not make it one jot less discriminatory and unlawful.

itsgettingweird · 11/02/2020 18:35

If the school rule was every person with hair of a certain lean goth Maury have it tied back then the rule applies to everyone.

But in this case it doesn't seem that it was. The comments were also discriminatory. If a child couldn't see the board - tell them to move. Set the seating plan so it isn't an issue etc.

Oulu · 11/02/2020 18:37

That's what I heard they (sic) say on the radio this morning.

What exactly did someone say, and on which programme?

That should have referred to people who support racism, not those who cry racism. Brilliant post! 100% agree!

I think your comprehension may be letting you down, @Hagbeth.

Plantainchips · 11/02/2020 18:41

It’s racist. Point blank period.

Piggywaspushed · 11/02/2020 18:41

When Rosa Parks refused to stand up and move on her bus, three other black people complied. By the logic of some on this thread she was in the wrong and hose who complied were doing the right thing... Imagine how that would have changed the course of history.

Oulu · 11/02/2020 18:43

It’s hair. Afro hair can be tied back like any other.

The point is that the school's rule was direct only against Afro hair. Why is it so difficult for people to understand that that is blatantly racist? Apparently at the relevant time it was absolutely fine not to tie back nice, flat non-Afro hair.

More racist to assume Afro hair doesn’t need to be compliant because it’s racist..

So would you accept that a rule that only Afro hair needs to be compliant is racist?

You aren’t allowed skinheads, coloured hair or other “extreme” styles at most school.

Equally stupid rules, IMO, but utterly irrelevant in this case.

Oulu · 11/02/2020 18:44

Out of curiosity, I looked up this school's current uniform rules.

Apparently their pupils can manage to see the board quite easily these days without needing rules about Afro hair. Interesting, that.

Hingeandbracket · 11/02/2020 18:44

How many schools in predominantly black countries would allow this hair?
What on earth does that have to do with anything?

OP posts:
FrancisCrawford · 11/02/2020 18:48

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Oulu · 11/02/2020 18:48

@1forsorrow, why are you so determined to ignore the fact that this isn't a case of a black child expecting to be exempted from a rule that applies to everyone? It's a case of the school acting unlawfully in putting in place a rule relating only to Afro styles that would therefore disproportionately impact on children with African-type hair.

Why should this school be exempted from following the rules that apply to all schools?

Plantainchips · 11/02/2020 18:50

Imo there’s no point debating with people arguing that this isn’t clearly discriminatory.

TreestumpsAndTrampolines · 11/02/2020 18:52

Absolutely racist - that first picture of when she was sent home at 14 was perfectly neat and normal-sized hair. Out of her eyes etc. I cannot see anything wrong with it.

I bet there were plenty of girls with hair just as tall in that 'messy bun' hair style.

ProfessorSlocombe · 11/02/2020 18:54

I’m frequently astounded by how obsessed some schools are with demonising what to me are perfectly normal hairstyles, such as afros and short back and sides, which I’ve seen described as “extreme”!

It's a lot easier than getting decent grades for the kids ...

TwitcherOfCurtains · 11/02/2020 18:55

It’s hair. Afro hair can be tied back like any other

Not all Afro type hair can "be tied back like any other", maybe your hair can but that doesn't make it true for all.

How many schools in predominantly black countries would allow this hair?

Quite a lot actually, it completely depends on the school. A lot of girls and boys just prefer to shave their hair at the beginning of the school year for ease.

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