to ask if you’ve ever been suspicious that a close friend wasn’t happy for you?

[NotGreatBob]

I’m talking about subtle signs, be it comments or actions/lack of actions.

If so, did the friendship survive? How? Wondering about a longterm friend who seems very petty lately. I really can’t be bothered with it and so have limited my contact, I feel dread at the thought of having to talk to her. It’s strange as nothing huge has happened. I wonder if she probably feels the same.

Yes I have. I know exactly what you mean. They make all the right noises but somehow you just know it's very false. I noticed this when my life was progressing and hers stayed the same.
We actually dont speak now, no major fallout. Just stopped communicating.

Yes. One long term friend. I could never understand it as she usually had better things going on than me. And when tough things happened to her I was super supportive. But I realise now that she could never have enough. She needed everything in her life to be better than mine and begrudged me any good things happening, or even attention when things were tough. It was often negging about positive things and underwhelming support for both negative and positive things. We are no longer friends, cos friends don't do that.

Yup. Sadly. It's exhausting, especially when the person seems to think the "good thing" happened by luck or a superpower as opposed to good old fashioned hard work...

One of my friends hates it when anything good happens to anyone else. It’s exhausting. There are various things she’s not happy about in her own life which explains some of it but she’s never wanted children and was properly annoyed to find out I was pregnant.

Yep I've been in a similar situation. Was finding the snippy comments were pissing me off more and more every time we met. I felt she had a chip on her shoulder about something but was taking it out on me being arsey every time we met.

She made me feel totally shit towards the end so I stopped making plans with her and she never questioned it so I guess she wasn't arsed either.

Life is too short to spend time with people who make you feel shit.

How exhausting people like this are to be with, is a common theme.

The key thing to remind yourself of is, that when you hang on to, continue to invest time and energy in these types of relationships, that you are in fact self sabotaging.

By accepting the friendship no longer works for you, and moving on, you are opening space in your life for nicer people.

Yeah. My former best friend took umbrage when I found a male partner, after previously being in a same sex relationship (best friend is a lesbian). I could have worked past this, but she also said some derogatory things about my new partner's race/religion, so I stepped away from the friendship. It was hugely disappointing, especially as she paints herself as an open-minded love-all kind of person.

Not as serious an example but I do remember a friend not reacting nicely when she saw I had done some decorating and put some nice new furniture and decorative accessories up and around the house.

"Is that new?" she said and then said "huh" when I replied yes.

Most normal people were like, nice! lovely, looks good etc. Not her though. She had loads more money than me but kept it frugal when it came to house stuff.

Only house stuff but it seemed very rude at the time.