Meet the Other Phone. Only the apps you allow.

Meet the Other Phone.
Only the apps you allow.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Non stop talking by friend

33 replies

B1uebe11 · 10/02/2020 21:42

I have a friend who talks non stop, doesn’t listen, interrupts when I try to speak and tells me the same things over and over again, driving me crazy. Any one else experience this?

OP posts:
StoneofDestiny · 10/02/2020 21:44

Is your pal P Morgan?

Apackoflips · 10/02/2020 21:47

I have had a friend like that. I avoid her now .
I liked her and her non-stop chatting until I suddenly realised that it was all about her and that she never asked about me or mine.

Roozy123 · 10/02/2020 21:50

Yes. My sister. Drives me nuts

Balkinfly · 10/02/2020 21:52

I had a mobile hairdresser like this and after a couple of years I managed to offload her - it was an agonising process.Confused

Sparklesocks · 10/02/2020 21:54

I have known people like this. Sometimes they are just a pain in the bum, other times they’re insecure and anxious and the babbling takes over to fill any potential awkward silences.

LellyMcKelly · 10/02/2020 21:55

My DP’s adult son is like this. Even when he stops, he’s not listening to anyone else speak. He’s just waiting for the other person to stop so he can start talking again.

alexdgr8 · 10/02/2020 22:00

I know someone like this.
any attempted conversation by me ends up feeling like a battle, or a slogging tennis match. the slightest thing somehow becomes an argument. it used to quite depress me, made me feel unconfident, ill at ease, as if in the wrong somehow.
but eventually I reflected that I do not feel that with other people, where the conversation flows easily, and there is humour, give and take, and an element of listening that reinforces confidence, rather than saps it.
but due to circumstances i do not have much opportunity to talk to other people, and have to see her, mostly daily.
I do get ground down by it.
I have wondered if she has narcissistic tendencies, or aspergers.
but that's academic; whatever, it still adversely affects me.
then I feel bad for letting it. stupid. she doesn't care about me, but I have a kind of caretaking role in relation to her.
am struggling a bit.

B1uebe11 · 10/02/2020 22:01

No chance of ANY silences Sparklesocks. She has a good heart but has no idea of how boring it is, listening to details of what every member of her family had to eat in restaurant ( and that is just one example)

OP posts:
Waitingforciara · 10/02/2020 22:04

These people are drains as opposed to radiators, they just take and give nothing

lemontreebird · 10/02/2020 22:10

Yes, I had a friend like that. Non-stop talking about work. I ditched her in the end.

AskingQuestionsAllTheTime · 10/02/2020 22:10

"His conversation of the you speak, I wait, you pause, I pounce variety" -- Viv Stanshall.

SerenDippitty · 10/02/2020 22:13

I can’t stand people who bubble away like demented kettles and don’t give anyone else the chance to get a word in.

illandBored · 10/02/2020 22:14

She might not know she is doing it ..

Just speak to her kindly and say you would like the chance to speak too.

She is probably processing her thoughts out loud rather than being self obsessed. Or she finds silence very awkward

Ouchaheadinmybehind · 10/02/2020 22:18

I used to have a friend like this. I no longer see her. Regardless of how lovely or kind she was I got sick of every meet up being a monologue of “ME!ME!ME!” for a couple of hours with a ‘so, are you ok?’ thrown in at the end when I already had my coat on and was dashing to school pick up.

Doobigetta · 10/02/2020 22:25

I have a colleague like this. She just babbles on, saying the same thing over and over again in a slightly different way, and all of it is the smallest small talk or the the most mundane observations you could possibly imagine. I think she must have a fear of awkward silences, and is terribly nice so never ever says anything remotely controversial that might offend anyone. Unfortunately I find it close to torture and tend to walk in the opposite direction quite fast if I see her coming.

Purplewithred · 10/02/2020 22:32

I’ve had two friends like this. One I dropped - completely self centred, no interest in me at all. The other I like despite the talking. she talks a lot but it’s driven by her culture, she is single and works in a non chatty environment, and when the initial tsunami is past she is interested, kind hearted and funny. But sometimes it does take a bit of getting there.

Bringmewineandcake · 10/02/2020 22:46

I have many of them...I seem to attract them Grin

DNR · 10/02/2020 22:56

Yes. Had two friends like this. At the same event, they got talking and it was astonishing. They sat there both talking at each other so clearly not listening to each other. I thought they'd hate each other but they both came away thinking they'd met someone amazing. I was astonished tbh but great they liked each other

suggestionsplease1 · 10/02/2020 23:02

I have one friend like this, it amuses me, I just laugh. But she's kind, has solid values and I'm ok with listening and getting a word in every so often.

suggestionsplease1 · 10/02/2020 23:02

O and I drink a lot when I see her, which probably helps!

DNR · 10/02/2020 23:05

It was very funny to watch. They were both excitedly and happily talking at the same time at each other.

earsup · 10/02/2020 23:12

Oh..yes...know some one like this...i have now blocked her on the phones and emails so she came to my house and asked my lodger if i was ok as she couldnt get hold of me....eventually sent her a text from a foreigh mobile number telling her i was working abroad now....silent for a while and now emails coming up again in the junk folder asking if i am back....i cant face her monologues about job interviews and child care and parking fines etc.....repeat repeat and all so intense and no pause for breath....even continued talking while on way to use toilet in restaurant or me driving away after a night out....just relentless....she is very thick skinned so i may need to be very blunt and just tell her to f off if she surfaces again...awful.

snappycamper · 10/02/2020 23:27

Sounds like you are friends with my sister. The good news is you're not related to her so you can dump her.

OutOntheTilez · 10/02/2020 23:31

Oh yes, I know someone like this. I ran into her last week after an evening school function. Off she went. I let her ramble for a couple of minutes before politely excusing myself and bolting.

Life is too short.

Pinkbonbon · 10/02/2020 23:40

Probably dealing with a narcissist.

The clincher is if you feel like when you finally get a turn to talk,they aren't really listening, they are just waiting for their turn to talk again. You find yourself rushing to say what you are saying thinking that otherwise they'll get annoyed.

It's the easiest way to spot their kind. They don't all do it of course (or they'd all be fecken easy to spot!) but those who do, I avoid now, like the plague.

If you want to be sure - look for it to be combined with the need to one-up everything you say. Their day was worse, their holiday was better ect...

She isn't your friend. Run for the hills!