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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To expect people collecting items offered on Freecycle not to take the p*ss?

55 replies

alicet · 03/09/2007 11:19

OK so I have been having a BIG clearout this weekend in preparation for lo's arrival in a few weeks. Have offered up literally LOADS of stuff on Freecycle. Now I know this is mutually beneficial - I get to get rid of loads of stuff I no longer want without having to make a trip to the dump / charity shop and they get something for free. However AIBU to expect people to be polite and courteous about this and thank me for the items they receive?

Most people were lovely but I had the following...

Couple arrive 30 mins late. no apology, no thankyou for the items, just 'it took us ages to find it!'. Well thats why I gave a list of directions including my phone number love - why didn't you call and don't you think you should say thankyou?

Man repetitively mails me presuming items I have posted as taken are for him even though I have not told him anything of the sort. Then when I do offer him something he doesn't respond!

And there are more but this post is already too long. Am I expecting too much??? OK so I am tired, hormonal and therefore cranky so I am probably making a bit too much out of this but it does annoy me!

OP posts:
LadyVictoriaOfCake · 03/09/2007 11:21

some people really forget their manners on freecycle. i got rid of two beds this week, and both people were extremely polite and collected on time. thats is a first for me!

HorseyWoman · 03/09/2007 11:22

Grrrr. There are people on freecycle who try to find stuff they can sell - ebay, carboot etc. And I think those people sometimes come across as more desperate/less thankful.

You no doubt feel hormonal, but tbh, how much do manners cost?

filthymindedvixen · 03/09/2007 11:22

Think you may have been unlucky. I gave away some plants last week and the recipient brought me flowers

And I will be picking up a free cabin bed for ds's room tonight.

Think you have to be quite laid back about stuff. There is a minority attitude that because it is free, it doesn't matter if yu actually turn up or not.

Like everything which is good in principal, it only takes a couple of bad experiences to make you feel crap. Rise above it and good luck with your impending birth

MerlinsBeard · 03/09/2007 11:26

i forgot freecycle. i am desp for shoty bunks for the boys before ds2s legs come out the other side of his cot!! will go look

WendyWeber · 03/09/2007 11:36

I recently gave away a child's riding hat on freecycle, collected by a bloke who said it was for his 5-yr-old. Shortly after that I put on 6 (SIX!) girls' duvet cover sets (things like groovy chick and purple ronnie) and he replied immediately saying the hat went down well, these would be acceptable, when can I collect them?

Admittedly I didn't say I would prefer them to go to several people, but what a cheeky get! I'm wondering now if he had a 5-yr-old at all, or if he is a car-booter.

(His latest wanteds are for camping equipment - "just starting out, anything will do" - and a piano. You know how some people just annoy you )

Original poster
alicet · 03/09/2007 11:41

Wendyweber oh yes I know how some people annoy you!!!!

Filthymindedvixen - can't believe they brought you flowers!

To be fair most of the people were lovely and I don't expect presents and overwhelming gratitude. Just a simple thanks. And to be honest although I try and pick people who sound genuine this weekend I just wanted rid so actually don't care if people are collecting stuff to sell - if I could be arsed I would do so myself but I can't and its still better than them going to the tip (or sitting in my boot for 6 months while I intend to take them to the charity shop!) But I do expect people to turn up when they say they will (or let me know - I know unexpected things do happen) and to say thanks!

OP posts:
filthymindedvixen · 03/09/2007 18:16

they were from her garden - but very much appreciated

And a lady who came today for some garden tools was so lovely I wanted to ask her in for a cuppa....

I should get out more really, eh?

NineUnlikelyTales · 03/09/2007 18:26

I gave a gym ball away on freecycle, the cheeky bint who got it didn't even collect it herself, she got a friend to do it. No thanks forthcoming from either of them, and she was posting yet more wanteds before the end of the same day. I left freecycle then as it really wound me up.

Bouncingturtle · 03/09/2007 18:31

I gave a way a pushchair and the fellow collecting it was so grateful!

Having said that, couldn't believe someone asking for a colour laser printer - do they realise they are very expensive? Very much doubt anyone has a free one to give away unless it is need of major repair. I do think some people get a bit greedy!

NoNickname · 03/09/2007 18:35

I have had a whole range of responses:

A couple of no-shows - annoying as hell.

Others where they have asked for something, then never responded again if I have said yes to them.

One I went out of my way to drive to meet her to deliver something, and she was mildly appreciative.

And one person left me a small box of chocolates when he collected something I left out for him. It was really sweet of him.

filthymindedvixen · 03/09/2007 18:38

our town seems particularly munificent. There have been new Next coffee tables, sofa sets one year old, loads of printers, Tvs, all sorts...

StripeyKnickersSpottySocks · 03/09/2007 18:59

I can guarantee when I post something on Freecycle (and I always put must be able to collect from XXXXX) - at least one person will email me whinging that they don't drive so I could I drive 10 miles to them and deliver it. Errrr, no.

LazyLinePainterJane · 03/09/2007 19:26

I had a woman who had a full on rant at me because I wouldn't deliver to her after she failed to turn up twice.

I cannot believe the stuff that people ask for on freecycle. A ps2 with games, laptops, DS games, plasma (!) televisions, honestly....

themildmanneredjanitor · 03/09/2007 19:30

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

derah · 03/09/2007 19:39

I've been getting the hump with Freecycle lately too.

I lent a woman 2 dog cages for a week, but asked her to make sure they came back because I'd promised them to a dog rescue centre. A couple of weeks go by, didn't hear anything from her, so I e-mailed to ask for them back. Got a reply saying "oh, guess you didn't get my e-mail, I left them in the driveway and the bin men took them". Not even an apology and she didn't even have to courtesy to phone me to tell me that my very expensive dog crates were in the skip. I couldn't believe it! And the dog rescue centre people were very disappointed too.

Then there are the "wanted" posts. If people really need something I can understand posting a "wanted" out of desperation and I've given away a couple of things to "wanted" ads. But now there seems to be more "wanted"s than "offered"s and the things people want are crazy! Tumble driers, trampolines, and yes, a piano! Utter utter madness and I'm thinking of dropping out too. People are really taking the piss.

themildmanneredjanitor · 03/09/2007 19:51

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

ja9 · 03/09/2007 20:01

dh and i have been speaking about freecycle a lot recently - we're sure there's bucket loads of material for stand-up on it.

one 'offered' ad in our city went into great detail. she offered

  1. 4 pairs of clip on earrings (detailed description of each pair)
  2. 1 single clip on earring (again detailed description)

can you imagine reading it and thinking 'gosh yes! i have an earring just like that... that will make up my pair'

rantinghousewife · 03/09/2007 20:01

Yeah I get really annoyed with the wanteds, we have more of them then the offered nowadays. Wanted Laptop must have vista installed! WTF

j20baby · 03/09/2007 20:11

i got a stalker from freecycle! he told me his life story, and stupidly i politely kept replying to him, had to block him in the end!

mine have been quite polite when collecting.

lisad123 · 03/09/2007 20:13

I have had mixed feelings.
I have posted things up and got replies like "when can i pick up?", umm when i offe rit to you if your polite I offered a dishwasher and one woman emailed me and asked how many cupboards she needed to take out!! I didnt give to her.
One woman turned up an hour and a half late, no thanks and im pretty sure went to carboot.

However, I posted a wanted for a crib as I sold mine when dd was 2 years old and couldnt afford a new one as im sick from work. I got a beutiful crib with bedding and even gave me a bath and bag of clothes. I sent a card

Wanted ads seem this week: laptop because he moved inot his own place and wanted one!, tv, psp, ds lite and my fav widescreen tv.

Fauve · 03/09/2007 20:19

It should really be self-governing, in the sense that you choose who to give the stuff to, so if you remember that someone has been rude or ungrateful, then don't favour them - favour the people who have behaved well. Ideally there would be a freecycle local community of people who sort of know each other a bit and help each other, IMO. Most of the people I've met have been lovely, but I was mucked about once, when people came to look and then decided against (but it was a v large item, so in a way fair enough). That was tedious and time consuming.

Caroline1852 · 03/09/2007 20:29

We give all our local stuff to Emmaus the charity. They come and pick it up and sell it in one of their shops and the money goes to a very good cause. They are always very civilised and pleasant.

3andnomore · 03/09/2007 20:40

aww..not nice when people don't appreciate what they get...I always am so grateful when I receive items and the people that received things from us were always grateful, too....

mamhaf · 03/09/2007 20:46

I've only posted on it once, to get rid of an outgrown child's wetsuit.
I gave up after the three people who said they wanted it didn't bother to turn up to collect.
So, no - YANBU.

Chirpygirl · 03/09/2007 20:49

YANBU, see here for why!

and I never did get my nap. bitch.