Aibu to not belive a word he says?

[FroggyGreen]

So I caught out (no longer d)p lying to me recently. Caused a big argument but things settled down. Now I have caught him out booking a hotel room for a couple of hours and telling me he was elsewhere. He came clean about it only because I had solid evidence. He says he booked an "escort" but they "didn't show up". He says it was a one off and he's never done this before. He says he did it on a whim. He says I shouldn't be upset because "it's not like it was an emotional affair". He says "I promise I'm telling the truth" and expects me to give him a chance.
It's all lies, isn't it?
He has destroyed any trust I ever had in him and thus destroyed our little family.

Why cant he help with kids?

Why does the suggestion that it was "on a whim" make any difference at all? The intention is there either way. OP If i were you i would definitely be looking into options- what UC would you be eligible for, how much maintenance, could you even get a minimum wage job so you have something?

Can you relocate back to near family? Will mean support with childcare and maybe better job opportunites?

I'm sorry to say he is completely lying. You deserve better.

He’s lying. Of course they showed up. He’s got caught out and trying to get out of it. Can you move to your family’s for a while? If also get a STD check to be on the safe side. Get rid of the cuntwaffle!

Is this the guy who said he was going to the cinema alone?

Booking an escort (even if she didn’t turn up) is cheating.

Get an sti/std check, sort your finances and leave the loser.

Things might be complicated but staying with this man doesn't bode well. Has he got form for this sort of thing or is it a one off? Although it doesn't really matter because he soon will have.

If you really think it wasn’t an escort and he’s having an affair... Tell him you’ve thought about it and while you could forgive a moment of madness if it was an emotional affair and he felt like he had real feelings for someone because of issues in you’re relationship you can’t forgive him thinking it’s ok to buy and use womens bodies for sex as money doesn’t equal free consent so you want to split up. Then he’ll change his story. There’s a small (very small) chance it’ll be the truth.

ILoveBlinking

I did tell him this, but it was after he'd begged me to believe the woman didn't show up (not that it makes a difference) and promised over and over that he wasn't lying and that he had never and would never do it again. So if he backs down and admits it's an affair it just proves he was still lying.
When I bring up other lies he has told me he says "those were just about material things, they don't matter"...so he clearly thinks lying to his partner is ok.

You really need to get tested incase you have any STDs.

Also you really need some IRL support and to start working towards leaving him. He has no respect for you, he will (or is, or has) damaged your mental health (and he is putting your physical health at risk too). I don’t know if you said you had children but if you have you don’t want them to grow up in that for much longer. Also you need to make sure you do work towards leaving because if you’re right and it’s an affair and not an escort, you need to be prepared for a day to come when he chooses to leave you.

I’m sorry you’re going through this