Hi,
Head a bit all over the place with a situation at school. Need some outside perspective. Lengthy history but will try condense.
Repeated incidents of bullying at school by the same group of boys and a couple of them are worse than others towards my DS 9. This has been going on for 4 years. Some of the incidents have been extremely violent and my DS is seemingly viewed as the weakest one/easy target.
Last two years it's escalated. Most of the time it feels like school haven't believed me until they have seen an incident for themselves. Only the last month they've finally (I think) put bullying label on as big changes has happened with one boy in particular. As this boy has been removed from problem times (lunch and PE) the wider groups behaviour has been more noticeable because those issues aren't been drowned by main bully.
Periodically school implements strategies, some work, some don't. All get dropped after a couple of weeks anyway.
After warning the school the Friday before last, dynamics were escalating after an incident, they ignored me. By the next Tuesday I asked if they had dealt with it as it was the only issue the head didn't cover in her email. No reply.
On the Wednesday a bigger violent incident happened. School didn't tell me, found out on Thursday through a mum of one of the boys who hurt him. (DS was with his Dad)
After being ignored so much I Write a letter of complaint to Board of governors as I felt the school just weren't dealing with it, they continued to ignore me and more incidents keep happening and hand it in Friday am. Friday pm get a call from head saying another incident and this time my DS stood up for himself (finally after 4 years of crap from these boys) and punched the boy back. I was angry but kept my cool and assertively told her I feel school has failed my son. She says she wants to meet to talk.
Friday evening get a email saying a number of key actions have been implemented off the back of issues and she wants to discuss on Tuesday.
Sunday evening I reply basically putting into writing what I said to Head on Fridays call and that I feel the school failed my son and put him in a position to fight back by not acting on it sooner. Agree to Tuesdays meeting. No reply
Tuesday morning send another email asking what time. Tuesday pm receive email saying no one can meet me today, a copy of actions (heavily redacted to take out names including of staff who are responsible for actions) and no offer to meet. Reply asking to meet. No reply.
Is this normal? To be effectively ignored repeatedly, incidents continue and now blocked out completely because I've held her to account and made a formal complaint?
Feel powerless. It looks like we have a new school for him though DD wants to stay in current school. Nothing formally in writing so excited but anxious to have it confirmed. I'm not rude, sweary etc. Don't call and email everyday etc. Try await replies and be reasonable in approach.
Just had enough of having the same conversation and watching my son deteriorate in front of me. He's had a psychologist report citing he is above threshold for depression, anxiety, panic etc. The effect this has had on him is horrendous.
Sorry it's long! If you get this far, thank you! Trying to reflect if it's normal for a school to ignore and block a parent? Feel like my DS and I don't have a voice.