Is this an attempt at control or AIBU?

[Nmechbge]

My ex and I ended things fairly recently and he moved out.
He contacted me about 2 weeks later asking for a friends with benefits arrangement and we were both happy with that.
However, he mentioned to me last week that if I even met up for a drink with another man, he’d expect me to tell him so that we could cut off our arrangement. This is coming from the same man who has told me numerous times that he is on Tinder, POF etc and has ‘matched’ with a woman at work.
I’m now interested in another man but not enough to want to tell my ex because it may not progress into anything at all. But I know that I want to explore things with him but if my ex knew, he’d want to end our arrangement.

AIBU in thinking that maybe I could meet up with the other man and get to know him before jumping into ending my arrangement with my ex? AIBU to think it’s none of his business who I see and that it’s an attempt to control me and who I see? Or am I just trying to have my cake and eat it?

Question is will he also be telling you as soon as he goes out with someone else and ending the fwb arrangement? No I don’t think so. So what he’s actually saying is he wants to be able to see and sleep with who he likes but you can’t do the same

I honestly don’t think a friend with benefits arrangement works well with an ex tbh and you are probably best just ending it.

What?

Err, he's your ex, so it's really none of his business what you do. But also, shagging your ex is

Stop shagging your ex and enter in to some consensual sex with someone else.

Why is he your ex? Wasn't he controlling in the relationship?

If he was, to get into any sort of relationship again with him and expect something better is unsensible.

Yes it's controlling.

He contacted you because he needed someone to temporarily shag while looking for a permanent 'shagmate'.

Is that what you want?

If it was actual fwb, neither party would care whom the fwb was seeing. So he wants to eat his cake and have it too. And you are letting him.

Walk away from your ex.

It depends whether or not you agreed to tell him. If you did, you should. If you said no, I don't feel obliged to tell you, and he's kept on sleeping with you then he's accepted that you won't tell him.You're sleeping with him knowing what you know. You're both grown ups. I wouldn't want to sleep with someone who was sleeping with someone else. Neither of you has to accept things beyond your own boundaries even if those boundaries are different. Just be honest.

If it's a FWB arrangement then surely relationship rules don't count.
Do you tell all your friends if you go for a coffee with another friend?
Sex in your case is supposed to be fun with no strings attached, your ex is trying to attach strings. In the definition it says 'neither party has to refrain from dating other people.'
I think you should just do what suits you as I suspect that's what your ex is doing.

Don’t tell your ex anything at all until you’re ready to end the FWB arrangement. See other people. Enjoy yourself. You owe your ex nothing. He’s the one wanting his cake & eating it! He doesn’t want you but can’t bear the thought of you with someone else? FTS!

(oh....and practice safe sex while you’re enjoying your single life )

Don’t let him treat you like crap

I think it's OK but you must tell him before you start sleeping with the new guy.