To wish Kate Atkinson would stop writing "S/he puzzled"

[JesusInTheCabbageVan]

On the off-chance that she's on here.

I love KA, have enjoyed every single book of hers I've read, but THIS is cropping up increasingly frequently and it's driving me mad. Yes, it's technically a verb, but people DON'T 'puzzle' in real life. It breaks the spell, and makes me think of muzzles/nuzzling. In Transcription, which I'm reading atm, someone has a 'puzzle' every few pages and it annoys me so much I can't concentrate on the next bit.

To make matters worse, people are puzzling over things they wouldn't HAVE to puzzle over if they actually paid attention and applied a tiny bit of common sense. Example:

"Whenever I hear that song, "I know where I'm going" I always think, "Do I?" said Daisy.
"Do you what?" puzzled Juliet.

Disclaimer: lighthearted, obviously. But stop it anyway Kate.

Oh I loved the adaptations
I might have to go back to them too.

I enjoyed Transcription. I like the Jackson Brodie books (though I’m not entirely sure what is going on). She writes very likeable protagonists. I hate it when you feel that the main character is an arse.

My pet peeve is the word sanguine.

mine is the word laconic. writers think because it rhymes with sardonic it means the same thing. It doesn't.

Love Kate Atkinson - all of them (although Transcriptions was only alright). Still have a crush on Teddy.

@aroundtheworldyet I read God in Ruins before Life After Life, and I'm really glad I did - it meant the ending of GiR came completely out of left field and was a total gut punch (two cliches in a row there ). I cried.

Well, I have now learned the correct meaning of sanguine! And 70% YANBU

EeWell I seem to remember James Herbert is wall to wall "small, pert breasts" as well. I think he tends to allocate breasts depending on whether he approves of the character - only good and virtuous (but also very sexual in a shy way) women are awarded the covered SPBs.

Also, has anyone noticed that Stephen King likes to write himself into books and then give himself a nymphomaniac sex goddess wife? He did it in It (adult Bill Denborough) and even more so in Bag of Bones - the main character (best selling author) gives his first draft novel to his wife to read, and after reading the whole thing in one day it goes something like this: "Jo sauntered into my study wearing only a pair of right denim cutoffs and a bikini top, and whispered in my ear, "I think you're going to be world famous, my darling. Now why don't you come and do me?"

*TIGHT denim cutoffs.

@madamhooch that was actually going to be my second thing Drove me mad in the first half of Transcription, but she seems to have calmed down now. Maybe the bracket keys snapped off her keyboard.

PD James - so much a character owns is “carefully,chosen”. Clearly the rest of us just rush into a shop with our eyes closed and grab the first item we see.

Oh and the females so often wear skirts in ‘“fine wool”.

@CaptainMyCaptain I’m read Judith Kerr’s When Hitler Stole Pink Rabbit with my Y5 daughter atm - she’s aghast at the number of times “said” is used!

I told that said is really good but her teacher needs to make sure she has a whole armoury of alternatives. She eyed me suspiciously.

The best authors, in my opinion, avoid flowery, wordy prose in favour of succinct simplicity. I think Michael Rosen has a rant about this.

Also, has anyone noticed that Stephen King likes to write himself into books

I gave up The Dark Tower series when he wrote himself into it in a Story Changing Role.

Having just finished Life after life I think that's the least of my issues with Kate Atkinson! do people really like that that multiple lives gimmick? it just made me queasy.

I just read the latest Jackson Brodie and have read all KA's books and never noticed anyone puzzling over anything! I didn't like Transcription but loved all the others.

My worst author phrase is "she narrowed her eyes". When I read it I always squint my eyes together, so then I notice if it is overused in a book as I am squinting repeatedly. I don't think people do narrow their eyes in real life?

Not Kate Atkinson but I find a lot of words that writers use instead of ‘said’ annoying. This happens a lot in children’s books. Eg ‘smiled’

And “cried”. At the end of everything. “Oh no” he cried. “Happy Birthday” he cried.

In real life, people never say that.

I love Kate Atkinson. If you are on here Kate, keep writing.

The premise for Transcription sounded promising. It was a bit disappointing, compared to her other novels.

I became irrationally cross recently when reading a book written by an author in her mid twenties who kept using the word “Oooof!”. It happened every couple of pages and it was always as a reaction to a very minor insult or some new information.

I.e

“Don’t keep going on about it!”

“Ooooof! Fine. I won’t.”

Or

“Haven’t you heard? Tom changed jobs.”

“Oooof! Really? I had no idea!”

I’m a similar age and demographic to her. I have never heard anyone SAY “Oooof!”. Is this a thing? Does it have to be written in every few pages?

Can’t bear to read another of her books. I was ready to throw the book at the wall in annoyance by the third “Oooof!” in as many chapters.

Not quite the same thing but I was reading a book once (so bad I can't remember the title or author) the main character was getting jiggy with a woman he'd just met and 'she slipped off her tight leather trousers' - slipped off her tight leather trousers not in a million years. I can't suspend my disbelief that much, she would have been rolling around on the floor trying to get them off.

I love Lee Child books, but every character 'dances' forward or backwards instead of walking, it drives me nuts.

Perpendicular I dunno, I could get behind that

By the way, every single one of you on this thread will love this book.

Not that I'm saying KA belongs in there, she absolutely doesn't.

My pet writing hate is “an empty bottle of wine” or “empty cup of coffee”. It’s empty wine bottle or coffee cup, ffs. They all do it.

Jesus

Well, I've finished Transcription and am 100% confident now that KA is a MNer - final chapters included a "This too shall pass" and one enormous WTAF dripfeed. Plus three more "puzzled" and one "puzzled politely" ("does that mean Juliet was puzzling rudely the rest of the time?" the OP puzzled).

Have to say - while there were some wonderful bits, I still vastly preferred God in Ruins, followed by Life After Life. Has anyone read "Everyone Brave is Forgiven" by Chris Cleve? A perfect WWII novel imo.

I've never been able to make it through a Kate Atkinson novel. So slow!