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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Who has the kids?

27 replies

Ijustwanttoretire · 31/01/2020 08:04

This is kind of hypothetical (never really been in the situation) but has anyone ever...

I read on here all the time about how a husband has decided he's had enough and swans off to another life with (or without) another woman, leaving the wife with the kids and all that entails. I am older now, and far less tolerant - but if I was my young self and put in that situation I would say 'fine, you want to bugger off, take the kids' (in fact me and my husband used to joke when the kids were younger 'whoever leaves has to take the kids' - they are now grown up and we are still together so it obviously worked ). I know the vast majority of people on here would say 'I couldn't do that!!!' but it would be interesting to know if anyone has. I was a single parent but that was my choice, I'm sick of hearing how men deem it acceptable to cut and run when they've had enough, fine, you don't love your wife? Fair enough, leave her - but if you love the kids as much as she does take them with you. Not a chance!!

OP posts:
Gillian1980 · 31/01/2020 12:23

Were not we’re.... bloody autocorrect!

Lillybobtail · 31/01/2020 13:08

I would love my ex to have more involvement or even be resident parent (he wanted kids more than I did, and always was sorry for dads who had little involvement after separation, but then has walked away himself). But front and centre are the best interests of the kids and fighting over not wanting to have them, and forcing someone to have them, was not in their best interests. So yes, it's shit that he gets to walk away and I don't, but I will put them first, even if he won't.

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