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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Would you take this job?

26 replies

numberonecook · 30/01/2020 10:22

Not so much of a aibu more of a wwyd?

Ive been working part time my field of work (which I kinda enjoy) for a while. The kids are older so I’m thinking of going back full time. I could easily pick up a well paid job in my field in the city where I live. Progression chances are ok.

However, even since I was a child I’ve wanted to do a certain job. I do have some experience and I feel at 36 it’s now or never. This job makes my heart sing and I’ve been offered a role close to home.

Trouble is it’s almost half the salary I could gain in my current field. We could afford me to take this loss but it would be a case of cutting back a little. Promotion is possible but not as easy.

Aibu to consider the dream job? Or should I follow the money?

OP posts:
Wintersnowdrop · 30/01/2020 10:28

Can you give a clue as to what the dream job is? Maybe someone here had done the dream job and has some insight into additional stress that the new job could bring?

RedRed9 · 30/01/2020 10:31

If it’s teaching, no.

JosefKeller · 30/01/2020 10:32

Life is short, if you can afford it, I would give it a go. You are likely to work until your 70s anyway, might as well enjoy it.

JosefKeller · 30/01/2020 10:32

I realise that my sentences are contradictory, but you get what I meant Grin

Newschapter · 30/01/2020 10:34

What field is the dream job in?

I started in my dream job on a very low wage just to get my foot in the door.

Am still there but at least my pay increased over the years! It's still not a huge wage but we get by and I enjoy it (for now!)

TheVanguardSix · 30/01/2020 10:34

You're not recording your life. There's no duplicate copy. All you have is now. And every other cliche! But how true are these cliches? So true.
I'm a huge believer in working in a field you love. If you can manage on the lesser salary, go for the joy, all day long.
Unless it's teaching. Grin

CoffeeCoinneseur · 30/01/2020 10:34

Difficult one.

What if your partner also discovered an opportunity to take their dream job at half the salary - could they do it too?

Are they totally on board and happy to be the main breadwinner while also having to ‘cut back’ to support your dream?

PattiPrice · 30/01/2020 10:40

Will you be on less money doing the dream job full time than you would be doing the other role part time? If so I would continue part time and enjoy your time off.

If you must work full time, and have already been offered your dream job, and can afford to take it, I’d take it tbh or you will spend a lifetime wishing you had, at least, tried it.

Lweji · 30/01/2020 10:42

Not sure what I'll say will help and I'm not able to vote either way.

For one, consider how happy you are in your current career. If you are unhappy, or even just going through the motions, then I'd say go for your dream job.
If you are happy enough, there's the danger that your dream job doesn't quite match your expectations and you'll go from good to not as good or even bad.

Regarding the money, is it more or less than you're currently earning? How easy would it be going back to full time and how likely are you to earn what you think you would?
You mention cut backs, which suggests you would be earning less than now, which can be a problem if your partner is not on board (as pps said) or if you have to change your lifestyle too much.

Having said all this, you don't even know if you'd get the job, so you could apply anyway and decide what to do if you get chosen, or learn more about the job itself.

motherheroic · 30/01/2020 11:20

Another 30 off years of working life left. I would do what makes my heart sing.

motherheroic · 30/01/2020 11:20

Odd*

5LeafClover · 30/01/2020 11:31

What are the long term prospects in each field...not just for progression upwards but for ongoing availability/ variety of work until you are ready to retire.

BlueJava · 30/01/2020 11:34

Why not take the dream job and see how it works out? I doesn't mean you can't swap later to a higher paying one if you want/need to.

PlomBear · 30/01/2020 11:35

Maybe I’m cynical but how much can a job actually be a dream? Would you still do it for no payment or if you won the lottery?

inwood · 30/01/2020 11:36

Is it full time and still half the salary of your current role or part time and half the salary?

Original poster
numberonecook · 30/01/2020 12:05

I could go back to my current job, I have a masters and PHD in current field and dream job is kinda related (sort of) so it it doesn’t turn out as great as planned I can change my mind.

Full time dream job salary is more than me being part time at the moment. Dream job salary would match DH salary. Current field full time would be almost double what DH earns so he’s not bothered either way. Just wants me to be happy

We don’t have a lavish lifestyle so we could easily cut back: Can’t really say what field I’m in at the moment as it’s quite outing but it’s one of those jobs I feel the higher you get the more boring and stressful it will be.

OP posts:
Original poster
numberonecook · 30/01/2020 12:18

I wouldn’t do dream job for nonpayment as I need to pay the bills lol, but yes if I won the lottery I probs would! When I get bored In between the holidays and pamper sessions lol

OP posts:
ItWillBeBetterinAugust · 30/01/2020 12:22

Why would you have to cut back? You're ready to go full time so your salary will be the same as your current part time salary, or even a bit more, you say.

So you won't have to cut back, you'll have to work more hours to stay as you are.

If you live the dream job enough to be happy with that, do it!

PattiPrice · 30/01/2020 12:35

So you won't have to cut back, you'll have to work more hours to stay as you are.

This.

Also progressing in a high paying stressful job may not be conducive to family life.

When you say the current career path is twice as high as your DH’s. is that immediately or only if you progress and gain promotions/seniority - neither of which are guaranteed. It is a difficult one though because my head would say be happy and take your dream job but my head tells me to earn double the salary for the same hours.
If you are happy with your home, location and the groundwork is done regarding good schools etc then go for the dream job. If you need to move, pay private schooling, want a bigger house, a more desirable neighbourhood etc then go for the higher paid job.

If you can take the dream job and revert back to the other role if it doesn’t work out, then do that without thinking any further.

5LeafClover · 30/01/2020 13:04

Based on your update I think you should go for it. Seeing progression in your current role as even more boring and stressful is not a good sign.

Foreverlexicon · 30/01/2020 13:07

@PlomBear a job can very much be a dream! I spent 3 years trying to get my job, it’s not a fantastic salary, the hours are terrible and the working conditions can be unpleasant and downright dangerous but I would of been absolutely devastated to not of done it. And if I won the lottery I would do the role voluntarily part time without a doubt.

OP - go for it. Life is short and you spend too long at work to not be enjoying it.

Thedogscollar · 30/01/2020 13:51

Lifes too short. Do it.

PlomBear · 30/01/2020 14:22

But most people don’t have dream jobs do they? Most jobs are in offices, shops, schools or hospitals. I don’t know of anybody in real life who loves their job. I’ve had lots of “good” jobs but I can’t say I have particularly enjoyed any of them.

ItWillBeBetterinAugust · 30/01/2020 15:30

PlomBear there are lots of people who'd do their job for no payment if they didn't need the money, although most people say they would do it part time (or very part time) in that context.

My father retired on a very good professional pension at 65 and went straight back to work 2.5 days per week because he lived his job. He dropped hours as his health deteriorated but still does a half day per week at nearly 80 even though he doesn't need the money at all and he can no longer walk more than 20 meters at a time. His identity is totally tied up in his job though, it's not just loving it, it's who he is.

Lots of people with professional jobs or jobs which are closely linked to their hobbies are the same.

PlomBear · 30/01/2020 16:24

When my numbers come up on the lottery, I’m out of here!

I’ve never been one to link my identity with a job - it’s really just a job to me. Not that there is anything wrong with your job being who you are - but that’s not for me.

DH is a military officer but finds it hilarious how so many military people are obsessed with their jobs, that’s all they talk about. Hopefully DH will find it easier when he leaves as to him, as he’s always telling me, it’s just a job. As long as they keep paying him and he gets his full pension he has little interest in all of it.