Page 2 | Am i the only one....

starlight86 · 2020-01-29T12:38:13+00:00

That loves labour? Friends and family think im nuts but i absolutely love it, i dunno why, a sense of achievement maybe? I find it generally easy, yes i know im lucky in that respect. I fucking hate pregnancy, it sucks the life out of me but dream every night about labour and when it will happen lol (currently pregnant with No 3) Am i weird or is anyone else like this?

firesong · 29/01/2020 17:47

Depends what type of labour. Had one that has frightened me off completely (not that I want more anyway) - very quick, thankfully but horrible. And pains that went on for ages afterwards. Was on gas and air nearly all day for afterpains. No euphoria, a flat depressed feeling. My first was nothing like that!

tenlittlecygnets · 29/01/2020 20:22

I think it's really important that women feel able to share their positive labour and birth stories to give other women confidence. Otherwise all you hear is horror stories, which is not helpful.

Mandarinfish · 29/01/2020 20:23

Me too OP

Oysterbabe · 29/01/2020 20:25

I enjoyed both of mine, it was just really exciting. They were fast and uncomplicated though.

Changeembrace · 29/01/2020 20:27

Love love loved pregnancies

Love love love labour

Original poster

starlight86 · 30/01/2020 10:08

The only thing that killed me afterwards was the after pains, NOT looking forward to that part after this labour!

OP posts:

NoMorePoliticsPlease · 30/01/2020 10:22

Although labour was hard I loved the experience and sense of achievement. You can see on this thread how some people feel thatt someone who has had a positive experience could come over as smug and that a relaxed attitude will produce an easy time. I do thing that mothers feel reluctant to say it was good, when others have had a bad time through bad luck. HOWEVER, when there are not difficulties such as the baby lying in the wrong position, the one thing that will worsen their experience is fear, and I believe more and more women are afraid of labour. This is not helped by other women describing their awful experience. I do understand their need to talk about it but it does not help women who have not yet given birth

Dontstepinthecowpat · 30/01/2020 10:27

I loved my first two labours, just normal deliveries I did tear but nothing to think about afterwards. My third labour left me needing counselling but I went back for a fourth and I would see he healed the physiological trauma of the third. Hope all goes well!

namechangingtime · 30/01/2020 10:33

I didn't love the individual parts of my labour, I was induced, had preeclampsia, one of my birth partners was difficult, and baby's heartbeat dropped at one point, however on the whole I did love it and can't wait to do it again.
I can barely remember the pain, I remember being uncomfortable and I know I was in pain but it's not stuck with me like breaking a bone has. I was also so relieved once baby was on my chest and that I'd done it all without needing to go to theatre (the doctor had come in to say it was a possibility and she wanted me to push so she could make a decision but that push allowed me to continue labouring without forceps) and then after the haemorrhage I was so relieved to be alive and enjoyed the cuddles so much.
I detest pregnancy though, by 16 weeks I had spd, and I haven't recovered at all 7 months on so I know pregnancy is going to be much worse next time, the constant hospital trips and fear when I didn't feel a kick or we thought my waters had broken early or I had strange pains/headaches/vision and my feet had swelled up to the size of a house was excruciating.
It's weird though because I've always wanted children but labour petrified me, it was the one thing that put me off of having children but now it's like I want to do it a hundred times more and probably even more after that! 😂

Mummyshark2018 · 30/01/2020 11:22

Yanbu to say that you love labour, but I think reframing it to 'so far I have loved labour' would be more appropriate. Wishing you another easy labour and happy baby, but...... just because you've had 2 enjoyable labours doesn't mean you'll have a third, and it comes across as a little smug tbh. I know several people with 2,3,4 kids who have had very traumatic last labours, to the point where they have said if they'd gone through that with their first they wouldn't have had anymore. I think you've been very lucky.

Original poster

starlight86 · 30/01/2020 12:58

@Mummyshark2018

Good point actually! Ive heard 3rd labours can be a bit of a nightmare and can go out the window a bit.

Praying thats not the case for me lol x

OP posts:

Quirrelsotherface · 30/01/2020 13:10

Had 3, first hideous, second completely enjoyable and empowering!! I agree it is mind over matter. I was in so much pain with the second and all I was thinking was this is just the beginning, as first labour had taken hours. Turned out I was 10cm and ready to give birth! I felt on top of the world when mw told me and laughed and talked whilst pushing baby out, on a bit of gas and air.
3rd even quicker, biggest baby and a couple of complications

OddshoesOddsocks · 30/01/2020 13:31

I enjoy it too!

I’ve been very lucky to have 2 pretty straight forward Labours, the first took 12 hours (6 of them in hospital) and was just a water birth with gas and air. The stitches were by far the worst part (along with being abandoned by my birth partner) but the actual labour itself was fine. I went in expecting the worst so was pleasantly surprised.

Dd2 was a 1.5 hour whirlwind at home with no assistance or pain relief just a traumatised DP! I’d do that again tomorrow.

Dd3 due soon and a planned home birth again, I’d like as close an experience to last time but with the back up of a midwife would be nice! Although we don’t get to choose do we...

I think mindset does go a long way to helping although obviously in a lot of situations it won’t make a blind bit of difference! But it’s that ‘keep calm and carry on’ kind of mentality isn’t it? With a standard, straight forward labour you either get on with it and do your best or go to shit and panic and that won’t help anyone.

MummyNWife · 30/01/2020 13:33

Yes i find labour very easy, ive had three labours and all of them have been 100% natural, not a sniff of gas and air. The last one was a water birth and i was laughing and joking throughout the whole thing. I don't scream and shout.

AhhARadoxBath · 30/01/2020 13:41

My first I can barely remember. It was many yrs ago.

With dd now nr 2. I was induced and I vowed never to have another dc.

That said.. I gave birth last week .. Yeah my I'm never having more didn't last long
I was quite relaxed and motivated.. Then for some reason as soon as they said I was 5cm and I would be having a baby by the following morning, sent me into panic. The. More I panicked the more it seemed to hurt.. We'll 30min later and dc was born.. 5cm to baby in half Hour. . I can't say I enjoyed it but was much more bearable than dc 2

Changeembrace · 30/01/2020 13:54

@starlight86

I suffered with my first. Nothing at all with my second

Changeembrace · 30/01/2020 13:58

Yanbu to say that you love labour, but I think reframing it to 'so far I have loved labour' would be more appropriate. Wishing you another easy labour and happy baby, but...... just because you've had 2 enjoyable labours doesn't mean you'll have a third, and it comes across as a little smug tbh. I know several people with 2,3,4 kids who have had very traumatic last labours, to the point where they have said if they'd gone through that with their first they wouldn't have had anymore. I think you've been very lucky.

The OP can indeed be definitive in her life of labour rather than reframing in to a woolly vague “so far”.

I love skiing. Yes, I could have a dodgy hol next year but, based on the two skiing hols to date, I’m happy to say “I love skiing”. And same applies to labour. Based on my two great experiences, I’m happy to say “I love labour!”

DisasterMagnet · 30/01/2020 14:03

I don’t LOVE it, but it’s far preferable to being pregnant!

Bitofnamechanging · 30/01/2020 14:07

I'm addicted to labour. I'd absolutely love to give birth again but I have two boys and wont be having any more - I want another labour and newborn. I don't want another pregnancy or another child so I'm done

Mummyzzz044 · 30/01/2020 14:15

You know what, when I was pregnant all I would hear off was how horrific labour would be, they would tell me about complications people had in pregnancy and In birth. It was all negative. I give birth to my daughter 6 months ago. After it was done I looked at my partner and said I could do that again. Dont get me wrong the contractions were horrible! But not an alien feeling. It seems natural to feel it. By the time I got to the hospital I was told it was time to push after being checked. No pain relief and I was so proud of myself!! I still dream about it now because it was such a positive experience and so beautiful. But we are lucky. My friend had a baby few months before me. Went to visit. She cried and told me how they had to cut her in all directions and some other details that scared the life out of me. But she really did have a traumatic experience and my heart goes out to her. I hope it doesnt put her off more children if she decides she wants more.

AryaStarkWolf · 30/01/2020 14:16

Yes you are a weirdo

Hazzy135 · 30/01/2020 16:54

I loved my labour!
I did hypnobirthing and I think a positive mindset and being prepared definitely did help! Although I appreciate that I was also very lucky in that everything went just the way I wanted it to when in established labour... I found the latent stage actually the hardest as it was 2 days long and I never got more than a 10 minute break.
I would look forward to a home birth next time!

Hazzy135 · 30/01/2020 16:56

And I definitely agree that people need to talk about their positive experiences! Labour generally has such a negative connotations. When I was looking forward to my labour (as a first time mum to be) I was met with nothing but cynicism.