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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Do I need to go to the doctors?

11 replies

ItsAlwaysSunnyInPhiladelphia · 29/01/2020 08:46

Shameless posting for traffic.
My head is all over the place. Here is why:

  • TTC for over a year. Had my bloods done and they’ve all come back fine. I know ovulation is imminent. DH has fobbed me off the last 4 nights. I’m out this month before ovulation has even started, that makes me feel fucking shit. I resent DH because he’s not in the mood/tired. Our sex life isn’t amazing but that’s both of us really not having high sex drives, having been together for 11 years. It’s normally about once a week.
  • DH texts a girl he works with. He’s told me about it and is open that they talk about work. But Christmas Day I saw a message from her ‘😘😘😘😘’. I bought his up with him and he says she was just wishing him a merry Christmas. I have broken down about it about 2 times since and he has sworn on my life it’s nothing to worry about. He is honest, I believe him. But my mind is always going into overdrive about it and I’m so paranoid it’s something sinnister. Since last time I broke down about it, I don’t think I’ve actually seen him text her. But the paranoia is there. The urge to go through his phone whilst he is sleeping is too much, but I know this is a total violation of his privacy. He knows I have issues as my parents marriage ended in a similar fashion of my dad having an affair and texting OW, lying and just generally being a manipulative . DH knows I have trust issues, that I’m paranoid about things like that and get upset easy as he was there all those year ago when it unfolded.
  • This started before the whole texting thing... But I keep having very intrusive thoughts and fantasies about hurting myself or killing my self, these have been going on for 2 months probably. (Fuck, that was hard to write). I think they are intrusive thoughts that I will not act on, I haven’t yet. But I can’t shake them. I am writing this because last night after he rejected my advances, I felt shit about the TTC thing, over another month of waiting as my cycles are long and shit and being paranoid about this work friend and I cried myself to sleep thinking about the ways to kill myself, digging my nails into scratching my wrists to hurt myself. I was in total dispear, sobbing like a baby all whilst DH was beside me peacefully sleeping.

It was because of last night I thought that maybe I need to go to the doctors and maybe get some AD and some councilling as I know this isn’t a healthy way to be. I’ve been crying this morning as well, which is unusual as my moods don’t usually carry over into the next day.

I’m sorry about the spelling mistakes. I’m in a bit of a fluster and can’t think of the correct spellings. I’m also sorry for the long post. Any advice or opinions welcome.

OP posts:
EnterFunnyNameHere · 29/01/2020 08:51

I think you've been really brave to post that, and it's such an important step to acknowledge how you are really feeling. Please please do go and see your GP. They are there to help! If it was a physical thing making you feel this way, like if you'd broken your arm, you'd absolutely seek help and this is no different Flowers

Jingers5 · 29/01/2020 08:51

I would see my GP.

custardbear · 29/01/2020 08:53

It certainly sounds like you need to talk to someone.
I think you need a frank conversation with your DH also, I'd be really uncomfortable if my DH received messages with those emojis on from a work colleague no matter what sex! Tell him how it's exacerbating your anxiety and damaging your MH - he needs to be open and honest with you and he needs to tell her to back down if he sees a future with you, because at the moment it's harming you and your MH
Good luck and get some support

MatildaTheCat · 29/01/2020 08:54

Absolutely see your GP and put thoughts of ttc aside until you are feeling much better.

custardbear · 29/01/2020 08:54

Oh, and phone today and make an appointment with your GP - don't delay as you'll talk yourself out of it

ItsAlwaysSunnyInPhiladelphia · 29/01/2020 09:06

I called the doctor expecting for all appointments to have gone as they normally do by 8:35am. But luckily, there is a MH nurse in the surgery today who had an appointment at 9am so I’ve dashed over to the doctors and waiting now.
Thank you all for your input. I will update you shortly when I come out. X

OP posts:
MissSmiley · 29/01/2020 10:30

How did it go?

ItsAlwaysSunnyInPhiladelphia · 30/01/2020 11:15

Good thanks.
Saw the mental health nurse, I was in there for over an hour. I went in a right state but came out feeling like a weight had been lifted. I have the information to self refer myself to Time to Talk.
I then had a appointment with the GP in the afternoon to get prescribed some AD. Which I have, I took the first one last night and it’s made me feel really sick, but have to persevere obviously.
Thank you everyone for giving me the push I needed. Hopefully I will start to feel better soon.

OP posts:
TulipsTwoLips · 30/01/2020 11:20

Excellent news. Well done for going. Flowers

GiveHerHellFromUs · 30/01/2020 11:22

OP please talk to your husband about the feelings you've been having.

If you explain how much it's affected you he might be able to help put your mind at ease.

You're being really brave x

timeforawine · 30/01/2020 11:51

Well done OP for taking action, i took anxiety meds and it took a few days of nausea for me to feel better but they did help.
Flowers

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