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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

to think the house should be in my name too

248 replies

CharlotteCollinsneeLucas · 27/01/2020 17:12

DP and I are buying a house. We're each contributing deposits of about 35% of the value, with the final 30% being DP's mortgage which he's moving over from his current house.

The solicitor's just said the legal title has to match the mortgage offer. So since the mortgage is in his name, the house has to be, too.

I feel really insulted! I'm paying for a third of this house, but I can't have my name on the deeds?

I fully admit to knowing almost nothing about house-buying, but I wasn't expecting this. It seems so unfair!

OP posts:
GreenTulips · 27/01/2020 17:44

I think you're all right, I don't want my name not on the deeds, even though if it's the marital home it matters less, I think?

DF married house in Husbands name only. He left. Refuses to divorce.

He can sell it without her permission, he can can he the locks, he refuses to pay council tax and she can’t claim housing benefit as she ‘owns’ the house. The debt is pulling up. She can’t get a council house or in the list as she has a house.

Don’t do it.

Bloody nightmare

Spodge · 27/01/2020 17:45

At the very least you should have a Declaration of Trust to protect your interest in the equity.

Josette77 · 27/01/2020 17:45

This sounds dodgy. I am wondering about your credit though since you were previously rejected? Do you know if your credit is good?

leckford · 27/01/2020 17:46

If he won’t buy in joint names you need to walk away with your money

Fairenuff · 27/01/2020 17:47

Tell him that you are not prepared to invest your money into property without your name going on the deeds. That's your starting point. Just don't give that option.

Then go together to see a financial advisor and a solicitor.

User12879923378 · 27/01/2020 17:47

The solicitor won't be talking bollocks. It's not the law that the legal title has to match the mortgage offer, it's a common condition of the mortgage company. The solution is to have the solicitor draw up a charge on the property that reflects your interest in it (making you a bit like a mortgagor) so that if the property is sold you get your share, or to draw up some sort of trust deed. The solicitor should be able to advise you on how to protect your share.

flouncyfanny · 27/01/2020 17:48

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

mrsmonkey333 · 27/01/2020 17:49

You could get a contract written up through a solicitor saying when the house is sold you will receive 30% of sale price or more as you put in 30% and contributed to bills.

When my parents broke up the house was in my dad's name but my mum got half cause she always paid half the bills and mortgage payments x

SHAR0N · 27/01/2020 17:50

So he’s going to own 2/3 of the house and you will own 1/3. But let me guess ....

You are going to split the bills 50:50?

Or you are going to pay more than half of the bills because he has a mortgage to pay too?

You are going to pay half of all the repairs and improvements ?

Maybe he will have all utility bills in his name and you will pay half into his bank account ? But of course you will pay for food, holidays and the car you both use .

Am I close ?

Original poster
CharlotteCollinsneeLucas · 27/01/2020 17:50

This sounds dodgy. I am wondering about your credit though since you were previously rejected? Do you know if your credit is good?

It should be - that was 15 years ago, probably. I've got credit cards in the last five years with no problem.

OP posts:
OnlyFoolsnMothers · 27/01/2020 17:53

Hell no- seek your own legal advice!

Original poster
CharlotteCollinsneeLucas · 27/01/2020 17:54

We'll split the bills 50:50, yes. I have four dependents in the house and he has one. So most of the expenses are mine.

That's not unreasonable, is it?

OP posts:
Orangeblossom78 · 27/01/2020 17:58

I don't think if married the husband could just sell the house...thought if name was on Land Registry the wife had right to stay in the house in that situation. At least until DC turn 18. I could be wrong though, but thought that was correct?

Orangeblossom78 · 27/01/2020 17:59

Well, he would be a step dad to the DC, no? But he expects you to split thins 50:50. Hmm.

BabyDubsEverywhere · 27/01/2020 17:59

Our mortgage is in DH's name alone, but the deeds have both our names on...

Tbh, as we're married we hadn't planned on putting my name on the deeds (seemed like extra paper work for nothing) but the solicitor insisted that I should for my protection so we did for an easy life. That was 10 years ago though, have things changed?

Laurendelight · 27/01/2020 18:01

BOTH of you speak to a solicitor. If you are renewing his previous mortgage then you might not be able to join. So, get a new mortgage. As long as your husbands salary can support everything you can be on mortgage and on deeds. Whatever happens DO NOT give away money.

AlaskaElfForGin · 27/01/2020 18:01

No bloody way.

PicsInRed · 27/01/2020 18:02

This entire thing is incredibly unreasonable, OP.

The fact that he's tried to convince you that you couldn't possible go on the deeds 🤨 and claimed this was his legal advice 😇 - total nonsense - makes clear that this (and marrying him) is a terrible idea.

He's seen you coming.

MinisterforCheekyFuckery · 27/01/2020 18:03

*We'll split the bills 50:50, yes. I have four dependents in the house and he has one. So most of the expenses are mine.

That's not unreasonable, is it?*

It's unreasonable given the set up he's proposing. You would have no rights to this property so you and your DC could be unceremoniously booted out of a home you not only invested 1/3 of the purchase price in but also took equal responsibility for all the bills. It's a great deal for him and very shitty for you however you look at it. Also, if you're commited enough to be living together and for you to be willing to invest so heavily in his house, why are the children considered only your dependants and not his? It just doesn't sound like a partnership to me.

Laurendelight · 27/01/2020 18:05

actually I might be wrong about mortgage. I had a salary when I first got a mortgage. Have renewed salary without an income though. You can be on deeds though.

Maybe you need to speak to solicitor and ask how you go about getting your name on everything and see what he says.

AutumnRose1 · 27/01/2020 18:05

I’ve ported a mortgage before

That’s definitely fine but there must be a way to get your percentage contribution noted and linked to ownership without being linked to the mortgage.

Love51 · 27/01/2020 18:10

We did it. I didn't have a job, was moving from uni somewhere that suited DPS job. The mortgage dealer explained that although my earning potential couldn't be taken into account, we could get a joint mortgage based on his income, but in both names. The deposit was tiny, the mortgage was tiny, the house was tiny, but it was all ours!
So if he says it's impossible, he's wrong. No way I'd move into someone else's house, plus you have dependants to consider. Protect yourself, no one else is going to do it for you!

Ratbagratty · 27/01/2020 18:11

I work part time, 2 kids I wasn't a liability. Adding me to the mortgage enquiry gave us a better deal as it was seen as more secure.

I think you need some independent advice to protect your money, yourself and your children.

Bartlet · 27/01/2020 18:12

Splitting bills 50:50 is fine as you have considerably more dependents. You must however have your contribution to the house legally acknowledged. Speak to your own solicitor to find out the best way to do it.

Love51 · 27/01/2020 18:14

Go together to the mortgage provider. Even if he has to entertain / control a toddler while he's there. Mortgages are too big a deal for you to leave to someone else.