Lazy partner..

[Becathx92]

Am I unreasonable for wanting out?

My partner of 2 years has been out of work for 18 months now, he hasnt even tried to look for work but was offered one 5 months ago (his mum had to get it for him) he was all set to start just had to fill the forms online etc. He tried but the link failed, I told him to ring and explain, he cant hes got no phone, I offer mine to use his excuse then "I need my mum to ring she knows what to say" this was FIVE MONTHS AGO, every week its "I'll sort it". Hes just so lazy it's like having another child (I have 2 kids from previous relationship). The whole thing is making me resent him.

He’s just another dependent that you don’t need, get rid

and if we split he would kill himself

No he won’t. It would take too much effort.

It is a big enough reason to split up with him. Just not wanting to be with him is a big enough reason. Because he has an annoying sneeze or shouts out the answers while watching the chase or only drinking lemonade through a stripey straw, or eating the fish fillet at McDonald’s, or wearing socks with holes in are all reasons you can break up with someone. They might all seem small and petty but any reason you have for wanting to end a relationship ship shows you don’t want to be with that person. And in your case it’s not a small or petty reason. It’s not that he doesn’t work, it’s that he doesn’t want to work, doesn’t work, needs his mum to call jobs for him, doesn’t do anything around the house, is manipulative and issues threats when you voice how unhappy you are.

And he won’t kill himself, it’s classic manipulation. I’ve been told by many men they’re going to kill themselves when they don’t get their own way, they’re all alive. Search on here and you’ll find posts where men have said it when their wives leave them, pull them up on their behaviour, find out about affairs etc, they never do it.

He would need his dm to make the noose....

What a nasty piece of work. Dump him. He needs to sort his life out. He's decided to be lazy and useless.... don't make this your life forever. Ignore his threats.

He sounds awful, you need to get out if only for the sake of role modelling for your kids, he's a useless waste of space. No job, doesn't do the housework, manipulative loser. And his problems are everyone else's fault to fix.

Whatever redeeming qualities he may have once had would have paled into nothing.

Show your kids your time and energy is worth more than wasting it on this idiot, op.

Where does his money come from? I assume you are feeding him too? He got comfy then left his job.

Just binbag the fucker. If he threatens to kill himself simply call dial 999 and tell them he is emotionally unstable and a danger to himself.

he said it's not a big enough issue to leave someone you love and if we split he would kill himself

You can decide to end a relationship for any reason you want!

And he won't kill himself. He'd probably have to get his mummy to help...

he's emotionally manipulating you. I'd get shot of the lazy cocklodger.

Prob still gets pocket money off his dm.
Seriously op. He sounds bloody draining in all ways possible...

I think the question you need to ask yourself is what example is this relationship sending to your children. I actually can't believe that you have put up with this shite for so long.

You deserve better OP. Don’t settle for this.

@AlexaAmbidextra very harsh but true.

Get rid. Why do you think that you don't deserve any better than this? You do! Do you want to do all admin work, cleaning, house maintenance, child care (if having children) + bringing home all the money? Exhausting.
Kick him out and then make yourself a list of qualities that you'd want in your next partner and also your deal-breakers. Lazy and unable to sort a job should be in the deal-breakers column.

Just dump him. Ignore his threat to kill himself, he won't do it, he's just trying to get you to stay in the relationship.

He's so bad that he wouldn't even find his own job, his mum had to. I think even if the link had worked he would have found some other reason not to take the job. He's comfortable with his life, between you and his mother he has his needs met. Of course he will make any threat he thinks that will work on you if he thinks this status quo is being threatened.
You need to stop listening to anything he says and break off this relationship. Just by making the threat of suicide should show you that he cares more about his wants and needs than yours. And that is not love is it? You deserve way way better than this waste of space.

Get your locks changed, get him out for good.

You only live once! Fuck him off out of your life. Pack him off to mommy's. Get your self respect back

I'm not sure how anyone can ever ever find a man like this an attractive prospect? What do these women see in them? I'm baffled

What a Cocklodger. Get rid.

and if we split he would kill himself
An emotional blackmailer too?

Does he spark joy in you? If not then get rid.

he said it's not a big enough issue to leave someone
Try looking at this the other way around. Not "what are my reasons for wanting out", try asking yourself "what are my reasons for wanting to stay together". Let us know when you haven't thought of any.