Slightly inspired by another thread. I'm a mum to dd (4) and ds (3.) I have just started having no childcare costs as I work Monday to Friday school hours only ( I work school holidays also.) I work 30 hours but pick the kids up at 3 three days a week. I realise this is a luxury as most working parents have to use breakfast clubs and after school clubs. I also have the added bonus of a five minute walk between school and work.
It's ok at the moment but we're just about managing. DP and I bring home about £28,000 p.a. We don't receive anything apart from child benefit. Trouble is there's no extra money for anything else. We need to do things to the house (our bath leaked last year and we haven't had any money to replace the flooring with new vinyl tiles, or replace the bath panel!) and I've booked a two night trip to see my cousin in London which I have no idea how I'm going to find money for next month. That's not even a week in the sun, just a quick half term trip on the mega bus! Then what if something goes wrong, we have no spare money to save, I feel it's all a bit precarious.
I'm also so so so bored in my job. It's an entry level admin job and I find myself getting involved with things that aren't in my job description and quietly getting told to stay in my lane. I work in adult social care and dream of being a social worker. I don't think we could afford for me to study part time via O.U. I've got an interview for a paid masters in Social work through my workplace and I'm excited but nervous. The scheme obviously isn't aimed at parents as it involves a six week residential stay (which I have no idea how I would do as a parent) and an intense year long placement which involves working full time and then studying for 25 hours outside of that. It sounds great but I'm also so nervous.
After that there's the actual social work career which is very full on and would impact on my children's lives. Sometimes I think about how different our lives would be if I worked full time. Coming home, feeding them something quickly and then homework and bed. This afternoon I picked them up and we came home and drew and listened to David Bowie for an hour. Then I made tea at a leisurely pace ready for a friend to come round. I used to work full time when they were smaller and everything felt so rushed, but we did have amazing holidays and days out.
I feel torn between thinking that we should be grateful that we have a house and don't struggle to put food on the table (partly because I'm very frugal and get the yellow stickers at 8pm every night!) and feeling like I should be doing more with my brain and for our families well being. Even looking at better paid, more varied admin roles mean going full time or working further away which would take me longer to get home. Should I just wait till they're a bit older.
DP is pretty certain that we should keep things the way they are. He has no idea about our £5K debt which was used for petrol, nursery fees and emergency Greggs when we were caught without snacks over the summer. He also has social anxiety and no ambition to better our finances. His solution is just for us to spend less (and be miserable) I also think as he is out the house 12 hours six days a week, the lack of money affects him less.