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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

"Best" friend dilemma

5 replies

InCognitoZombie · 24/01/2020 12:32

This may be long sorry...

Recently split up with my partner of over 18 years, my friend hasn't really been that supportive through it all (in fact I think she was judging me for splitting up with him-just going on something she said) money has been extremely tight as he is not paying maintenance and my job is seasonal-winter is bad for work.

It was my best friend (of over 20 years) birthday in November, I asked her what she wanted and she said to go to the cinema to see a film which wasn't out until 2 weeks after her birthday. (2 weeks before xmas) I said fine and kept a bit money to one side. Nearer to the time I said do you want to go on tuesday or wednesday? (This is the usual deal as I get 2 for 1) she said she couldn't make either day but could do thursday. I said ok fine. Like I say money is tight so I had to spend the money put aside but that was ok as I get my tax credits on a thursday, so all cushy, or so I thought. She messaged me saying she can now make it on Wednesday as her plans were cancelled. I explained that I'd had to spend the money but can still go Thursday. Needless to say she wasn't very happy and has not spoken to me since. Also puts PA memes on fb (which tbf might not be about me)

Now I'm trying to look at it from her pov, and yes I'd been telling her I was getting a large sum from a customer (£500) in December but I also told her I owed my nan half as I'd borrowed some and also had to get (3) kids xmas presents out of it (as well as usual living costs)

I'm honestly not sure whether it was me being mean or her not being understanding of my circumstances. What do you think?

OP posts:
CakeandCustard28 · 24/01/2020 13:03

She said Thursday. Not your fault that she changed her mind last minute. Your friend sounds selfish.

InCognitoZombie · 24/01/2020 16:17

Thank you. I tend to overthink things and keep trying to see things from her POV, but can't understand why what I did wrong was unforgivable.

OP posts:
SameOldHorrorStory · 24/01/2020 16:22

No it's not you being mean. She pissed around with the plans at the last minute. If she hasn't spoken to you since November(!) and it's only because of this, I think it's time you start phasing out your "best" friend.

Urkiddingright · 24/01/2020 16:24

She’s a twat. She changed plans last minute which didn’t work for you and she’s behaved like a total child ever since. Just block and move on.

AryaStarkWolf · 24/01/2020 16:24

She's the one BU 100% How selfish of her

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