Do you ever decline friends calls ?

[Inliverpool1]

If you’re just not in the mood ?
I have one who phoned on the way to work, at lunch time and for a natter after work, sometimes when the kids are in bed too.
Generally I don’t mind but there are says I can’t face it.
Then I feel bad

@goodgodingovan It had previously been the time we'd told her to call at, when the DDs were toddlers and asleep. So I suppose it would have been more accurate to say that this was when they were 7 and 4 and DD1's issues were manifesting themselves. MIL couldn't take it in that things had changed.

The issue really was that she would call multiple times, despite having already left a message, and my DH always returned her call when it was convenient.

Always! I hate phone calls. I will only answer to my mum or DH. Everyone else can text me. 3 times in a day is a bit much to be calling you though, that’d get on my nerves lol.

always decline if i'm busy.

Yes. Text me unless it's an emergency.

One of my friends will always respond to a text from me with a phone call

I have that friend too. Hate being called when I’m in the middle of something with the DCs. I decline and ask if she is OK by WhatsApp. To which I generally get no response - perhaps she is miffed.

I do this with everyone. It’s not specifically reserved for friends.

I need to wean her off me tbh
I thought start by cutting down to one call per day max

Apart from my mum, I don’t have many phone conversations. Maybe once or twice a year with an aunt,
Or a quick call to my husband during the day (never for just a blather; there always a point to it), or occasionally when a friend is
Going through a tough time

If someone was ringing me 3x a day I'd be changing my phone number never mind declining the call!

I hear ya beaver .... she’s a single mum, bit lonely, no support but it is fucking ridiculous tbh. I’m looking to move house 30 mins up the road at least and that’s one of the attractions I’ll be an hour away

If someone was ringing me 3x a day I'd be changing my phone number never mind declining the call!

This in spades! Why on earth do you think there's anything unreasonable in not wanting to talk to someone three times a day???

I cannot BEAR talking on the phone. I like chatting to my mum (mostly because she is exactly the same as me and hates being on the phone just for the sake of it) and my husband because it’s usually important or he’s being funny and I’ll laugh or just tune out 😂 anyone else phoning for a natter fills me with utmost dread. I had a friend who used to call every night and want to be on the phone for about an hour 🙄

I would pick up and say I’m very sorry now is not a good time can I call you back later? They would then say ok and then hang up.

This is about boundaries, OP. Why not tell her that you'd prefer it if she texted you and only telephoned you in an emergency. She sounds suffocating and needy.

I could write a book tbh @ Lizzie030869 it’s one emergency after another. Without being too outting my child has had surgery today so I got off the phone fairly quickly this morning and in theory she could be calling to see if he’s ok, but then wouldn’t you text if the call wasn’t taken ? Therefore I doubt the call was about that

It depends on the friend.

Mostly, yes, I do this whenever I don't feel like chatting. However, a couple of friends right now are going through realy difficult times (e.g. family members dying) and so I always answer to them - no matter how I feel or what time it is. They both know they have a free pass to call me, for whatever reason, at whatever time.

Your friend is very selfish, O0, if she would trouble you on a day when your DC was having surgery. A real friend would send a text wishing you all well and saying that she was thinking of you, or maybe a card. Tbh, I would distance yourself from her; she sounds very lonely, but you have too much going on with having a DC in hospital.

I hope your child is okay following the surgery?

Thank you, kiddo is on the mend. And yes you’re right it’s all a bit one sided.

I do this all the time. I get a bit peopled out during the day and don't want to spend my evenings on the phone. I just let it ring so that it seems like I am not by my phone. Then I phone back or message when convenient.

I do this frequently. I only really speak to my Mum on the phone and that's because its easy chat.

Like others, after a day in a 'people/client chatty office', then having to get tea, bath DD, put her to bed, the last thing I want to do is have a chat on the phone.

I decline 90% of calls- I don't like talking on the phone