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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Passive parenting....

1 reply

inmyshoos · 23/01/2020 11:17

Re posting here shamelessly for traffic as feeling quite upset about this..
I have a long term partner who has dc and we sometimes spend time together with my dc.

Recently his dd12 has been quite unkind to my dd11 and a few incidents of being extremely rude to her df... Telling him to f off...

Dp has spoken to her and asked her to do the right thing, apologise etc but nothing and I find it so upsetting. Never any consequences for pretty hideous behaviour and dp has quite significant mh issues so the stress of this impacts on him greatly.

I feel like I'm at watching a car crash...

I know he will be terrified of losing his dds love. But I've tried hard to deal with this as sensibly as I can. Protecting my own dc from it etc and trying hard to understand how hard it is for him but it's so upsetting. The stress it causes him is awful and it impacts on myself and my dc because his dd behaving like this means we spend less time together and makes it strained in general. I don't want to push too much but she has so much power and it's terrifying.

Aibu to say nothing? Not my business?

OP posts:
lexiepuppy · 23/01/2020 12:08

This is a tricky one. Personally I think you have to defend your daughter and she needs to know there are boundaries, swearing at anyone is not acceptable.

Why is she so angry at her father? Did he break up the family?

His passive parenting and" doing anything for a quiet life" Will rebound on you all.

I would have a sit down family discussion to what is and isn't acceptable, possibly easier said than done as i imagine hormones are kicking in.

Maybe she needs some one on one time with either you or your DP and to find out why she is so angry and what makes her tick, before she becomes a teenage tyrant!

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