How would your primary school deal with this?

[SaveWithJamie]

Not really 'AIBU' but posting for traffic as I really need some perspective so I know what to do tomorrow.

dd is in Yr3. A boy in her class who acts very silly a lot of the time has hit her repeatedly over the last couple of terms. He basically walks past dd and then elbows her or slaps her tummy or legs. I know this child is very disruptive in general.

I have spoken to the teacher previously who has been supportive. Dd was advised to tell the boy to "stop it" and then go and tell a teacher, which she does.

We haven't had any hitting incidents for a few weeks but, today, the boy hit my dd's ribcage 3 times really hard on two different occasions throughout the day. He hit 2 other kids as well.

I'm not sure what to do next.

How would your school deal with a child who repeatedly hits other children and what would should I do next?

Dd is upset and I am not at all happy. How can I protect my dd?

I'd be kicking up a big fuss, I think. Ringing to speak to either the class teacher or the head and wanting to know what plan they have to keep your daughter safe.

They have a duty of care to keep your child safe. If he has to be put on 1:1 supervision so be it.

If she has bruises etc I would also photograph themes evidence.

The school should be following their behaviour policy. They have a duty of care for your child. I would be requesting a meeting with the teacher and saying that the behaviour is still continuing and you want to know what they are doing (not what are they going to do as they should be handling it already) to keep your daughter safe from him. If not satisfied I would meet with headteacher.
As a teacher we would be disciplining this child in accordance to our behaviour policy and we would have had this childs parents in for meetings. Each incident would have also been recorded for evidence which may be needed in the remaining school years if the behaviour continues or escalates. The child would be kept away from the child/ren they are targeting and if the events happened at lunch and break then procedures would be put in place to manage it. It is not acceptable for him to be assaulting other children.

I have previously spoken to the teacher and kept my attitude firm but also understanding e.g. I did not kick up a fuss.

What are the school's options though? How can they keep this boy away from my child?

One of the incidents today took place when my dd was about to wash her hands before lunch. The boy elbowed her and then kept digging his elbow into my child ribs.

You can't really see them about him, they can't/shouldn't tell you anything about how they are dealing with him. You can ask about how they intend to keep your daughter safe, which they absolutely need to be doing.

You can ask about how they intend to keep your daughter safe, which they absolutely need to be doing.

I will do this and I will escalate to headteacher level this time as we have had a few conversations with the class teacher previously. I feel that hitting her three times in a day and once by persistently digging his elbows into her is an escalation of the situation.

I'll ask what they will do to keep my daughter safe. I suppose I'm wondering what options they have to keep her safe. Many of these hitting incidents happen when the dc are lining up to go in and out of the classroom.

As a teacher I'd be looking to change what happens around the times the hitting is occurring. So when they're hand washing before lunch, I might have them lined up at separate ends of the line, or give the child who's hitting a job, eg. carry some of my books to the staffroom and they walk there with me, or the child goes with another adult a little early to wash hands first. There are ways to do these things without arousing any suspicions as to why.

At a meeting with the victim's adult and the victim, I'd discuss a strategy and ask the child if they think that might help. Then I'd put it into place and keep a close eye. Incidents would be recorded and passed on to SLT so the severity and/or frequency are noted by someone other than me. If strategies don't work I'd be asking for help from SLT to resolve it. And I'd keep the victim's adult in the loop the whole time.

If the teacher was supportive last time and it stopped then there's no reason to suddenly jump to the head now it's started again. Go back to the teacher and explain the problem has started again and ask what they are going to do about it. If you went to my head they'd refer you back to me as I'm the one in the classroom day in day out.

If you'd complained and it hadn't been taken seriously/nothing had changed then yeh escalate to the head.

Keeping children safe when there's a particularly disturbed or violent child in the classroom is almost impossible when the teacher is unsupported. Ordinary behaviour strategies don't work and his parents often aren't coping, don't care or are absent. Transitions and lunchtimes can be particularly difficult. Complaints from other parents are often the only way to get the teacher extra help, because if she complains, her HT will be happy to keep the focus on her classroom management skills. So go in and be firm, but don't get cross with the teacher, because I'll bet she's having a hellish time too and would be more than grateful if you and the other parents manage to get this situation turned around. So take it high as you can, because you'll be doing the teacher a favour too.

Ok thank you WombatStewForTea that's actually really useful advice. re the headteacher's involvement. The class teacher was previously very supportive indeed and she is very competent, I respect her a lot and dd loves her.

Regarding lining up, my dd told me that the boy pushed the queue and run inside the classroom without lining up. When he ran past my dd and her friends he hit them hard. He doesn't hit the boys apparently, 'just' the girls.

Not sure if I made this clear but apparently he punched her with all his might and it really hurt. No bruises I can see though. I'm a bit a lot pissed off.

Mhm... based on Downton57 maybe I should involve the HT. To make more noise...

She might have a bruise tomorrow.

We have to escort our children right to the dinner hall now. We then have to wait until the dinner staff are ready to take them. Knocks about ten minutes off our already short dinner time.

If the teacher has been supportive in the past then it would be better to go to her initially. Is there a TA in the class at all?

I think if he's really hurting the other children it has gone past 'naughtiness' and it sounds as if she does need extra help in the classroom to deal with him. Of course, I might be wrong, and she might be coping fine, but I have seen a lot of experienced teachers really struggling with children whose behaviour is extremely challenging.

Thanks again. What would extra help entail? can I request / suggest 1-2-1 supervision or that the by is never left unsupervised during transition e.g lining up for lunch periods?