Aibu to be freaking out? Probably

[Bitofnamechanging]

I cant seem to pull myself together.

I finished work at 9.30 last night. Was up at 4. Boys work at 5.15 (tired and grumpy). I left Dh in bed as I couldn't have had more sleep anyway. I was trying to be kind.

Gets to 7am. Dh has to get ready and leave for work at 7.30 so is zero use. My fault really - I should have been an adult and TOLD him I wanted help. So I've gotten cross and shouted at him.

The food shop is arriving shortly, I really want to tidy the house, I'm not showered, washed or dressed.

Oh and the health visitor is coming at ten. I'm worried and stressed. Ds1 is having a weight and height check due to concerns over his growth. Also he's having a 3 year development check because he failed his 12m and 2y checks. The boys are trashing the house as quick as I'm tidying it

I'm tired, grumpy and keep shouting at the kids. Oh and while I've been writing this post my two year old has shit in the hallway.

Gentle kick up the bum please. I'm fragile.

You sounds very tired. Make a list of what needs to be done.
Clean the poo up then start to tidy up. Just throw it into boxes. Once the shopping arrives put it away then take yourself and all the kids upstairs to shower and dress.
Then get out and about and try and come ho.e for a a nap later.

Will the children watch telly? Can you put something on whilst you do a quick clean?

Tonight have a conversation with you DH about him helping more.

Why has your son failed his checks? You could also have a chat with your health visitor if you are feeling overwhelmed. Two young children sounds very difficult!

Oh we've all had a toddler shit in the hallway

Think about what you need to do or make a list and work through it as quickly as you can. Would putting the tv on or giving the children tablets for an hour help?

Most important things;

Have children had breakfast, teeth and faces washed & clothes on?
Have you had breakfast or at least a cuppa? Get yourself a shower & dressed.
Next is the house, is it actually that bad or is it only toys? If there are dirty dishes and clothes then I'd sort them but personally I'd leave the toys out as the kids will only pull them out again anyway.

Making a list helps me feel calmer.

Oh if it's dry where you are and you have a garden then a quick run around outside might make the children more amenable.

I've put them in the bath so I can have a wash. They're currently squabbling over something. If it makes any difference they are only just two and only just three. They're so young still really.

I'm so worried about this weight and height check that I feel sick. I know that it's completely out of proportion though. The development check I'm very nervous about but not stressed.

I've eaten a bag of doritos over a coffee, so....

Ten is smack bang in the middle of the morning and in some ways I don't want the three year old to run off steam because I want them to see him at his worst. I know that sounds awful

They're both dressed in towels and wellies

They're both dressed in towels and wellies

Then they're dressed!
No real advice except to just focus on the essentials for 10am and plan a TV/coffee break when HV has left. .
Good luck today

Towels and wellies

and in some ways I don't want the three year old to run off steam because I want them to see him at his worst. I know that sounds awful

It doesn't sound remotely awful, and if you've got concerns about him I'd thoroughly recommend it.
You can explain kids behaviour until you're blue in the face, but a child going absolutely apeshit right in front of the HV/doctor often leads to an "Ohh I see what you mean now!" moment

I hope your day goes well.

This could have been me yesterday. Husbands dont understand the stress of it all. Be nice to yourself. Best of luck with the check

And when your DH comes home tell him what you need.

Is he generally helpful?

When dh comes home I will be going out to work. He's good but has the emotional understanding of a tree.

When do you get to sleep?

@MuthaFunka61 I'm only working till about half 9 tonight. Husband works early so that he can earn but still get home so I can leave. Today I work at 3. Dh then often has to get up at 4am to study.

15 minutes to go. I've given up and am feeding the boys cereal while I have a coffee

And to be honest. His "lie in" didnt take any sleep from me. I was up and awake at 4 as I had a stiff back

You've had loads of useful advice already, plus it's not far off 10, but I wanted to say, dont stress about the checks. My (super intelligent) 6yo has failed every one of her development checks.
Plus 3 out of my 5 have had "growth issues". They've all caught up. Unless hes not putting weight on at all, and hasn't for a good while (ie months), dont panic.

@Whitelisbon can you explain more about the growth issues? That's really interesting. Ds1 has dropped from 91st (weight) and 98th (height) to 25th and just below 25th over the last 18m

OP was your DS born at 91st?

I swear some people just grow big babies, and children then find their size.

Isnt it funny how my DS was born 20th% but shot up to 80th%, and all the HVs said was "he is finding his own size".

Meanwhile I would love DD to be 25th%. She is 0.4% for adjusted age. They don't even work it out for her actual age!

Ps my MiL told me Bil was reviewed as a child because for a long period as a toddler he didn't really grow at all. They didn't find a cause, he's now a healthy 6ft 1 adult.

My daughter had growth issues. She has very short legs so although she was at the 25th centile for height her body was on the 50th and her legs on the 8th. She has growth hormone jabs now (she is 10) and has grown almost 8 inches in the last 18 months. There are things to be done xx

If I lived nearby I’d drop in

Once the shopping arrives put it away Once the shopping arrives, put away the stuff that needs to go in fridge or deepfreeze. the rest can wait.

@NoIDontWatchLoveIsland no. He was born on the 9th. Was 91st at 12m and has steadily dropped ever since

What were the deleted posts?