To ask for £1 instead of a present

[Piccalino3]

My son is about to have a whole class party in a few weeks and I'm dreading the piles and piles of presents that will be coming through the door.

I don't want to sound ungrateful and I also know that if I ask for no presents people will bring them anyway. I don't want anyone to feel bad that they didn't bring a present (as asked) but I also don't want so much stuff. Our kids are very lucky to have lots of nice toys and the more they have the less they seem to play with. I don't want people to waste their money and effort. I don't want to have to haul a load of things to the already full charity shops, all of which will end up in landfill in a year or so. It all seems so utterly pointless and the wrong thing to be teaching my children.

So, would I be unreasonable to ask for £1 in a card if guests have not yet bought a presents and would like to? That way he can buy something in a few months and choose something he wants, no waste, minimal expense and effort for parents. Would
It be crass? Ungrateful? If not unreasonable how can I word it without looking like an idiot?

I'd let people do whatever they wanted tbh and deal with whatever they're kind enough to choose to give your child.

It's the risk people take when they insist on hosting whole class parties, instead of inviting their kid's actual friends.

Gift giving is part of our culture (assuming you're British and even if you aren't, it's part of many cultures). I always feel uncomfortable when hots try to 'control' it, as the giving part is what makes the guest feel better.

*hosts, not 'hots'.

I was shocked when my DD1 had her first whole class party...the present thing just hadn't occurred to me. The pile was astounding....30 largish gifts...I agree that asking for a fiver will make people feel more comfortable than a pound.

I always write 'gift bringing optional, please don't feel obliged we just want you to come join in the fun' on our party invites. I have triplets so if we get to many gifts or duplicates I donate them to FINDs Christmas charity gift donations or our local hospitals children's ward. No waste then. 🎁😊

DS has a party coming up, I texted the mum to confirm and she texted back saying, he is saving up for a computer game rather than a present, money would be better. I was so relieved, saves me trying to figure out something to buy him.

I would also not give a figure amount, just say, DS is saving up for xyz and would prefer money towards this than more plastic tat

I think it’s fine to request no gifts but in bad taste to request money