Football match

[beckywiththeshithair27]

My ex wants to take our ds8 to a premiership football match. So very big, busy stadium in a very big busy city. Also an evening match so would be a late finish and a very long journey home.

I have no reason to doubt ex's care but still feel a bit uneasy. Am I being over protective? Would you/do you allow this?

He'll be fine. I took nephew to Chelsea v Man U at a similar age. He loved it - mainly because he learnt some new words

I've been to countless games. First when I was 10.

I've seen "trouble" twice in that time. Last time would have been the early 2000s. The vast majority was going to enjoy the game and the atmosphere. Sure, there will be troublemakers but you get that in a shopping centre.

The match will be fine. Make sure ex knows to leave 10 minutes before the end, it will probably cut the journey home by about 45 minutes to an hour, maybe longer, depending on what ground it is/mode of transport etc

Odd decision to take him to a late kick off, which I assume would be midweek. My two don’t come to evening games, they’d be too knackered, but we do have season tickets so they don’t miss out.

Most stadiums have an allocated family area. Could they not sit there?

@flowery

Leave 10 minutes before the end?

Yes, that’s what I said!

Where we go it would add an hour to the journey time to stay until the final whistle so unless it’s particularly exciting and we have no issues about dog care/trains etc, that’s what we do. I certainly wouldn’t be staying to the end with an 8 year old for an evening game.

But as I say, we have season tickets so we get to go plenty. If it was a one-off we wouldn’t.

West Ham matches don’t usually get all exciting in the last 10 mins, other than for the opposition...

Mine have been going since they were tiny babies. At 8 I wouldnt have even thought about it, mine go to the local derbys also but these are well managed by the police so are pretty safe if you keep out of the thick of it all.

My DS has been going to watch LFC since he was 3. Never had any problems (apart from repeating a few choice words he’d heard...but that can happen in a lot of different places)

Make sure ex knows to leave 10 minutes before the end

OP don't even think about saying it. No football fan would do that, it's bonkers. (and if they do they should give their ticket to real fans)

It will be fine. The Premier League doesn't really attract the headcases, and even at "high risk" matches the hooligans/ultrás contact each other in advance and arrange punch-ups (I'm not even joking…)

Also for your peace of mind, learn to let go when DS is with your ex, it will make your life easier :)

”OP don't even think about saying it. No football fan would do that, it's bonkers. (and if they do they should give their ticket to real fans)”

Yep. We definitely spend ££££ a year on four season tickets because we’re not “real fans”.

You’re lovely aren’t you?

Actually we’re just putting the family first. But if that makes me not a real fan then that suits me fine. When it’s just DH and me, no tired kids, no dog to worry about, we’ll stay until the end. Until then, that’s what we’ll do, and it’s certainly what I’d do on a late night with an 8yo.

Which match is it? If he's taking him to Arsenal then no problem, I've seen loads of kids of all ages there without a single problem. If it's Sp*rs against West Ham, I'd suggest not, as a) the language would be a little "fruity", and b) there is often violence at those games (usually outside the stadium).

"Leave 10 minutes before the end?"

Absolutely not - the last few mins are often the most exciting and if 'his' team win the cheer at the end will be something he'll be talking about for days,

I'm a season ticket holder at Arsenal. They swear there too...🙄

They do, but it's not as bad, nor as aggressive/racist/abusive as some places.

Bluenose kids are VERY rude. I've heard some choice language from them at Goodison Park! Not racist chants, thank fuck, though my brother has back in the '90s.

Chelsea, Spuds and West Ham are the ones with the main hooligan element. The Manc teams aren't so bad.

Leave 10 minutes before the end? Noooo.

That's like leaving a play or film without knowing what happens at the end! Statistically, the last 15 minutes are the most likely time to see goals, and also from a supporter's point of view, the most exciting time.

We take DSS's regular. It's an hour and half drive each way so it is late nights but they absolutely love it and it's something we really enjoy. I personally wouldn't stop him going with his dad

I wouldn't worry about violence unless it's a particularly charged local derby. Expect him to hear swearing though. But an 8 year old for an evening kickoff, I'd worry about tiredness. I'd favour a weekend game when the kid will be more alert.

Have you ever been to a big football match yourself, OP? If not, you may have some preconceptions about what it’s like which are very far from the reality.

I am a season ticket holder at a big Championship club, and I can’t remember the last time I saw any trouble. Loads of parents bring their kids to every game. There are loads of women, girls and retired people. It’s definitely a safe environment for everyone.

Your son might hear some bad language, but if he is in the family area, even that is well policed by the fans and stewards.

He will have s great time!

He'll be fine, and a late night as a one-off won't do him any harm. I still remember my first night game and I must have been a similar age - being up late made it even more exciting! Don't suggest leaving ten minutes before the end, if they miss the winning goal (statistically quite likely) you'll set yourself up as the one to blame.

The only reason I'd say no was if it was between 2 big rival teams eg Liverpool and Man Utd but then again only if it was a big game. I use to go with my dad all the time from age 6 and we use to leave 5-10 minutes before the game if it was 2 big rival teams playing. Other than that I'd let him go, I love football and games are amazing to go to, I love the atmosphere!

Never leave early

Even if your team is 4 down

tbh, flowery fans who leave the stadium early make me wish fervently for last minute goals. Lots of 'em.

I've been going to football matches for nigh on 50 years and I've never met a fan who would leave early. Getting stuck in traffic is all part of it (although a much better part of it is using public transport and commiserating with everyone or celebrating with everyone and taking the gentle piss out of visiting fans)

@araiwa why never leave early?