To hate the phrase 'It's if your face fits'

[TDMN]

Disclaimer: I understand that in some workplaces there are deeper issues such as racism, sexism, disability discrimination etc. at play.

But in my workplace everyone who complains that their 'face doesn't fit' are all people who are known to have short tempers, be argumentative instead of constructive, are really defensive, make a huge issue out of any type of inconvenience or change rather than working towards a solution....
They seem incapable of grasping the concept that if you behave like a stroppy teenager then regardless of the quality of your work you are not likely to get promoted as the company wouldnt want to risk you pissing off stakeholders or ending up with a grievance from a team member.

When i first started working i also had an extremely short fuse, so whilst I was great at the work i struggled to progress. Since i started making a lot of effort to change my behaviour, this has been recognised and i've been promoted as a result. Which is why the 'Its if your face fits/mates with management/brown noser' bothers me even more - im still opinionated and passionate and not best mates with any 'clique' - i just learnt to manage my temper/express my opinions in a more professonal way.

It's not even really an AIBU - just interested to hear other people's experiences/thoughts really - anyone's workplace like mine at all?

I think that face not fitting is a "thing". I worked for a cradle to grave type company for a few years where everyone had a very established routine and pecking order. It honestly took months of people pleasing to be accepted. Sometimes established groups are very guarding and wary of newcomers and you have to be able to rightly or wrongly be seen to adapt to their culture to be accepted.

I also think ‘if your face fits’ is a thing. And I’m not argumentative.

@newyeardietstartstomorrow
Yeah I see what you're saying, almost like newcomers aren't part of the 'plan' for the pecking order - might not even be personal, might just be that there's a way things are and variation isnt welcomed.

@highonpotandused
Yeah its weird in this office, i've worked elsewhere previously with some lovely people who say 'my face doesnt fit' (there was genuinely an issue with the boss promoting his girlfriend over others) but in the current office its extremely obvious why these people arent progressing - its about 10 people out of 250 and there is a lot of variation of personalities/levels of outgoing-ness in the management team so if there is something else going on im struggling to figure out what it is!

If your face fits is a real thing. Personally i have worked in a few places my face hasnt fit so no matter how hard i tried, how much effort and work i put in and how much i did as i was told i was still punished and riddiculed

It's definitely a thing! My face does fit at work and my path is a lot smoother than a colleague whose face definitely doesn't.

In fact she has applied on several occasions to a different area of business but not even been shortlisted for interview, despite being already in the business and fulfilling all the criteria. She's made a bad impression and (rightly or wrongly) that won't be easily forgotten