To worry about DDS health?

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DD was 6 a few month ago. She’s average height and exactly 3 stone so she’s pretty slim. She has asthma and allergies.

Anyway, since Xmas time, I’ve regularly had to take her to the toilet feeling nauseous. She hasn’t actually been sick on any of these occassions. To give you an example, she ate 3 bites of pizza and an activia yoghurt (adult size) last night at tea time, she hadn’t eaten anything for a few hours before hand, and she said she felt sick because she had eaten too much. She even said, “mummy can I have a really small breakfast tomorrow because I’ve had a big dinner?” After eating such a small amount. At Xmas time, she ate 2/3 of a mars bar, having eaten nothing apart from a small bowl of cereal a couple of hours before and then was telling me that she felt sick. She said she knew she should have stopped eating it sooner but she loved the taste and got carried away. Now I’d understand her feeling sick if she’d eaten half her selection box but she had literally eaten 2/3 of a bar. There are about 20 examples of this over the last few weeks and a number of occassions before then (although less frequent) of her doing this. She’s currently got a blocked up nose and 2 mouth ulcers which have just come on in the last day or 2 so I’m thinking she’s now getting run down.

She’ll eat a bowl of porridge for breakfast, she’ll regularly finish her school dinner, but she doesn’t eat a huge amount more after school. I just feel as though she’s not eating enough and I don’t understand what’s causing the nausea.

She had a sickness bug early last month and she does seem to have a bit of a phobia of being sick. I can be sitting in the toilet with her for 5/6 hours straight when she had a bug. She’s scared to leave just incase and needs me to sit behind her and rub her back for the full time so I’m wondering if this nausea could be linked in some way.

I know I need to take her to the GP which I’m going to organise tomorrow but I’m just sat up worrying and hoping for some thoughts/advice.

Thanks

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I’d be concerned about this more from a psychological perspective: “ “mummy can I have a really small breakfast tomorrow because I’ve had a big dinner?” After eating such a small amount. At Xmas time, she ate 2/3 of a mars bar, having eaten nothing apart from a small bowl of cereal a couple of hours before and then was telling me that she felt sick. She said she knew she should have stopped eating it sooner but she loved the taste and got carried away.”.

Why does she think that constitutes a “big dinner” and why does she think it’s really bad to have some of a mars bar? Is there someone in her life who’s talking a lot about dieting and not eating too much, or not being greedy? On TV or at school?

Could well be combined with fear of vomiting too.

(((Hug)))

It’s worrying when you know they’re ‘not right’ & a GP visit is definitely a good idea.

However the not wanting to eat/had a big dinner etc stuff could also be - being told if you eat too much you’ll be sick & if school is focussing on ‘Healthy eating’ that can cause some issues too. Or maybe someone has said she’s far/tall/eats too much or a number of other daft things kids say!

I don’t think a 6yo not being able to eat a whole mars bar is surprising or a bad thing. Plus on an empty stomach they are quite filling & ‘rich’. It would make me feel sick.

If she’s not actually being sick I’d take her into the lounge (with a big bowl) & just distract her with a game/chatter/tv etc. I wouldn’t stay in the bathroom & if she’s worrying about being sick just tell her she has the bowl.

It could be a bit of attention seeking too after you ‘mummying’ her when she wasn’t well over Christmas but now she’s back at school she’s missing you & wants your attention.

They’re funny littke things 6 year olds!

Hopefully it’s something & nothing x

Yes I would second the idea about taking a bowl to the living room then distracting her

Or bless her, she sounds run down and terrified. Let her graze on whatever she likes until you have seen her GP.

It sounds more psychological although I'm not sure her diet is helping boost her up if she's showing signs of being run down. That sounds a bit beige and eating in an irregular way. I'd get her to the GP but equally make sure healthy snacks (cut up cucumber, carrots and cheese etc, or fruit) are always available and offered to her regularly. Make sure she sees you eating well and exercising. Go for walks together or swimming. I would be really mindful of someone having told her or her overheard about watching what is eaten or overeating. Could you ask her if she's worried about anything?

My first thought was has she been listening to people talking about eating too much, doing the whole "I couldn't possibly have another bite" thing after a small amount of food, etc. A lot of people engage in this. Her comment about having a tiny breakfast after a large meal would worry me. Maybe be extra careful about the messages she gets around food and model a healthy relationship with food to her?

I had a chat to her last night about how our bodies work and how important food is to keep us healthy. I used the analogy of a car needing petrol to run. It was a very relaxed chat and came up because she asked her dad why he was having 4 wraps at dinner time. He’s a soldier so I explained how the more active you are, the more good you need to keep your body healthy.

I never diet so she’s never seen me calorie count or anything like that. I had a chat to her the other night after her 3 bites of pizza and yoghurt. I asked her why she thought that was a big dinner. She said that she had eaten the yoghurt quickly and it had really filled her tummy up and that’s why she felt sick.

To the poster saying her diet sounds beige, we normally have home cooked healthy meals but the kids had been asking for pizza for a little while.

That wasnt in ref to the pizza (apologies that wasnt clear) it was more about porridge followed by a mars bar. There are loads of great way to up fruit and veg but adding to meals. It's not a judgement but something I do myself when I feel a bit meh or rundown for a boost. Its great you've had that chat with her but look a little further at influences. It may not be you or DH but a teacher, aunt, friends parent etc or even a tv show perhaps?

The examples you've given makes me wonder if she has a dairy intolerance (yogurt, pizza. Chocolate). I wonder if this is making her feel sick? Maybe try reducing dairy for a bit to see if this helps.

See at her school they give stickers for finishing lunch which I really disagree with. DD has been trying really hard to get the stickers even though I’ve told her not to bother about them. Do you think that could be linked in some way?

I remember being like this as a child. I think it started after being sick and vomiting. Feeling ill made me not want to eat. Not eating made me feel sick. The tiniest bit of food made me feel full and I worried about being sick, so I ate tiny meals. If I was anxious about something I felt sick, so didn’t eat in case I was sick.
This cycle lasted, on and off, for around 5 years. It came to a head at around 15 years old when I lost a lot of weight and was threatened with hospital.
The cycle was broken each time by not having set meals, but by constantly grazing on tiny portions of beige food that I liked, so crackers with cheese spread, bread and butter, apple etc. Eventually, I realised that I wouldn’t be sick every time I ate and gradually moved to eating proper meals at meal time. I still eat small portions as I hate feeling full, but eat a lot more normally.

That could certainly be linked if theres encouragement not to 'overeat' at other meals/snacks in order to finish her lunch. It's worth a chat with the school. You may find they ditch the reward system if enough parents raise concerns about its effects.

I may speak to the school about the stickers. I know they help with some of the fussy eaters but I do think they’re detrimental to DD.

I do just worry incase there could be something more at play, something physically wrong rather than just psychological. And I do think she could really do with gaining a few pounds.

Oh bless her! I agree it sounds psychological, linked to her tummy bug and maybe something she’s heard.

I also wouldn’t hang around in the bathroom waiting for her to be sick. Give her a bowl and distract her for sure. And try to remove all pressure around food/mealtimes. Just let her have a little of what she wants, with other healthy snacks available.

Food is such an emotive subject, isn’t it?

Dairy intolerance often follows a tummy bug, too. Porridge/yoghurt obviously full of dairy. Could you try and avoid it for a while (not cut it out completely without doctors input but maybe give toast for breakfast/ jelly as a pudding and just remove the obvious large amounts of dairy)?

The problem is, when she feels sick she panics and point blank refuses to leave the toilet or sit with a bowl. I’m working on it with her though. During her last sickness bug, she was falling asleep at the toilet having been in there for about 5 hours. I managed to lift her out with a bowl. She refused at first but I eventually managed to persuade her. I do think me being able to persuade her was largely down to how exhausted she was.

Do you think it’s worth a visit to the GP? I just don’t know if talking to the GP about it in front of her could do more harm than good.

Gastroparesis?

I’d potentially visit the GP without her? And see what their thoughts are... or go into the GP first chat leaving DD outside with DH, then take her in.

The sickness could be because she is so hungry she feels sick, then eats too quickly? The less she eats the smaller her tummy becomes so she will get full ever so quickly. I

1 mars bars make me feel sickly i think its high in caffeine.
2 possibly soy allergy -yoghurt and chocolate both have it in
3 could just be the virus going round , mine has had d&v a couple of times recently
4 other things can cause sickness - ear infection/uti etc (though i guess might have fever too)

Stomach is only the size of their fist.

Thanks for all the replies. I really hope it’s something that can resolve itself quickly. She’s just really thin and has no reserves if she was to get unwell (and she’s quite prone to catching things). I don’t want her to get any thinner.

If it is linked to anxiety, the doc might not help her initially so I do think it might be a good idea to go and see one without her and see what they think. Is there anything she loves that you can offer? Just try not to draw any attention to what she’s eating. Talk about something else. No coaxing, cajoling or even congratulating. Just let her quietly get on with it.

Poor little thing. 5 hours in the bathroom...definitely some kind of safety behaviour linked to anxiety. I would call the GP and speak to him/her confidentially without your daughter. She might need a referral to someone who specialises in this kind of thing