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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

I can't read aloud

48 replies

Myusernam · 18/01/2020 19:29

Growing up my mum was an alcoholic so took zero interest in me and at school I was really badly behaved, I never paid any attention in class but I was always around the middle academically.
I've had a well paid job in oil and gas and never had any issues with my work. When I had my son I left to spend all my time with him.
Now he is 4 and I am reading slightly longer stories, I have noticed that i really struggle to read aloud. I get words mixed up and slur my words. I need to really concentrate in order to finish the story. Any ideas why this is or what I can do to improve? He doesnt even notice at this stage but he will as he gets older.

OP posts:

Blackbear19 · 18/01/2020 20:57

I can do it and read fairly well to DS but don't ask me what I have actually just read. It's weird as anything, if I'm really interested in a book I can read to myself and follow the story. But i cant seem to be able to read allowed and follow the story.

I was confirmed to be dyslexic about 15 years ago but I wasn't aware of the reading allowed thing after DS was born and I was doing story with him.

Whoremione · 18/01/2020 21:09

I used to be a copy editor and I read 3-4 books per week for pleasure and I’m awful at reading aloud. It’s because I read in my head much much faster than I can read aloud and my eyes are several words ahead of my mouth. It’s also dead boring and I’m glad my kids are long past that stage.

Dilbertian · 18/01/2020 21:16

When you read aloud slow d..o..w...n. Until you are very experienced, no matter how slowly you think you are reading, you are actually reading faster than you realise. This is even more the case if you are reading something very familiar or you are nervous.

You may think that you are reading ridiculously slowly, but believe me that's not what it will sound like to your listeners. It will sound natural.

As for expression, don't worry too much. That will come with time, as you get used to the actual act of reading aloud. And even if it doesn't, your dc won't care. My dh is the most monotonous reader imaginable, but the dc loved having him read to them. They would not allow me to pick up where he left off in a book, I had to read them something entirely different.

ArthurDentsSpaceTowel · 18/01/2020 21:20

TBF there are some classic children's books that really do not work at all read aloud. (Treasure Island springs to mind.) And in order to read The Secret Garden you have to be able to do a proper Yorkshire accent, even if the book dialect is a bit sketchy.

Newname1978 · 18/01/2020 21:27

When I read aloud I just cannot comprehend what I am reading. I read it fine but have no clue what I've read. I have to reread silently. I remember being like that as a child too.
What I'm saying is my problem is different but reading aloud seems to come with issues

Miljea · 18/01/2020 21:34

newnane I'm exactly the same. I can read out loud eloquently. But I have no idea about the content of what I'd read out. Me, reading out, doesn't pass through the 'actual registration' part of my brain. Does Not Compute. It's weird.

Admittedly, as primary schoolers, early 1970s, our (ex- traditional prep school) teacher insisted on public speaking; the technique was to be 2-3 words ahead with your eyes, from what you are reading out.

Elouera · 18/01/2020 21:43

Well done for having a a good career and managing a family despite your early life. Its a credit to you.

Did your mother drink when pregnant with you? Do you ever spell words incorrectly or a D instead of a B? My immediate thought is actually dyslexia. I know 2 friends that weren't diagnoses until their 30's! Have you ever been tested or done online tests?

Miljea · 18/01/2020 21:49

So, usernam, my advice would be to get time alone. Pick up a book, like your DC's reading one; get a cushion to be your DC.

Start reading, slowly and clearly, but make your eyes scan 2-3 words ahead of what you're saying. Note how professional choirboys flick the page 3/4 of the way through a stanza-they're reading ahead. So you'll turn a page before finishing saying the final word/s on the last page. Two or three words will do it.

All it requires is practice. It's a learned skill, not innate!

picklemepopcorn · 18/01/2020 21:56

Tips!

Read the sentence in your head. Then read it aloud, pausing at any punctuation. You'll get really quick after a while, but you don't need to be- people need time to process what you said.

I listen to people read aloud all the time. They never go too slowly, usually they go too fast.

LynetteScavo · 18/01/2020 22:01

I think it's a learned skill. I'm quite good at reading aloud. I've just done a little bit to myself, and I realised I read ahead but say the words in delay, at the same time as reading the next words, if that makes sense- then I know if I'm going to have to change my voice or pause etc.

pineing · 18/01/2020 22:06

What another pp said. You read much faster than normal speech, so when reading aloud you need to slow down. Something that helps me is to read up to a comma or the end of a sentence first, then read it again, saying it aloud the second time.

As in many things, practice makes perfect.

Original poster

Myusernam · 18/01/2020 22:08

Thanks for all of the tips and reassurance, I feel so much better now! Definitely its like my mouth cant keep up with my brain but then it all gets a bit jumbled.
I am fine with spelling and writing to the person who asked. But when I read up on the ADHD a few things did come up but nothing that concerned me. Just my interrupting and inability to focus on boring tasks 🙈

OP posts:

Hustssleeping · 18/01/2020 22:08

Practice. Your brain is faster than your mouth. I get this still and I've been reading to my DCs all their lives. It's just not what we're used to. I get it at work sometimes too!

GeraltOfRivia · 19/01/2020 07:23

Reading aloud is such a different skill to reading in your head. I do it a lot as I get on stage so sight read in the beginning of rehearsals.

The biggest thing to do if you want to improve things is slow down your head reading speed. If you can slow down the reading in your head then your mouth can keep up. As you practice it will improve.

I agree with a PP about tiredness making it all harder too.

Iggly · 19/01/2020 07:26

When I’ve listened to young children read (I did it for a year at primary school), I would get some of them to use a piece of paper to hide the lines below. I’d also get them to use a finger to point at the word they’re reading and slide along as they went.
It helped them focus - not many kids needed to do that - only a couple.

northernknickers · 19/01/2020 08:32

Hi OP, as others have said, it takes time, practise and confidence to read out loud as an adult (it's not something that most adults need to do very often, so we lose the skill).

It is lovely though, that you want to get better at this in order to be a great role model for your children 💐

It could be worth buying these (photos attached) Reading Highlight Strips. We use them in school for children who find tracking the words a bit tricky. They help massively! They would also help your DC, so you can model using it and they would follow your lead.

The different colours on the strips are to help eye stress...some people find the 'black on white' text difficult, so the colours help with this. When you're not reading, you pop the strip inside the book as a bookmark 🔖👍

Cornishclio · 19/01/2020 08:45

Reading aloud is a skill which needs practising. I am a fast reader and if I have the house to myself I tend to read books aloud for a bit to force me from jumping ahead. Try and read slower and focus more on the intonation and try to really get into the story like an actor would. Maybe listening to audio books might help but I think your problem is you are rushing it.

Coulddowithanap · 19/01/2020 09:02

I'm exactly like this, makes me very nervous about reading aloud as I just can't do it. Even my children laugh at me muddling the words or putting my own words in.

I've got a job that I need to read aloud over the radio, I have to only write a few sentences and read it exactly right but every time I've tried it has come out back to front. I've not come across anyone in real live who struggles like me so food to hear I'm not alone.

Definetly going to practice more with reading aloud at home as it has helped lots of you.

stripeypillowcase · 19/01/2020 09:10

I give presentations at work - but I don't read them I freeflow and narrate (for want of a better word)
but that's very different to read to dc as the presentations are my specialist subject and I know them inside out.

unlike harry potter or whatever book I and dc are reading together.

Original poster

Myusernam · 19/01/2020 16:26

Those are fab northernknickers, I will have to get them! They look great for when he starts to read too. Thank you all for commenting, I wasnt expecting such a response

OP posts:

Bambersbooks · 03/07/2020 21:30

This reply has been deleted

Message deleted by MNHQ. Here's a link to our Talk Guidelines.

Baypony · 03/07/2020 22:17

Google Meares Irlen Syndrome, could you have that?

MrsKypp · 03/07/2020 22:21

When you read normally (without reading out loud), do you think of the words in your head, as if you're saying them?

I think some people do, and they will be the ones who can read out loud more easily.

I'd agree with others who say it will improve with practice. You might want to read the text in advance, and use highlighters for the most interesting key words. Then read it silently in your head, then read it out loud. It is natural to pause slightly before key words.

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