To bring my DSis to a wedding not DH.

[surelyitcantgwtworsethanthis]

Live overseas. Bridesmaid at a wedding in the summer. It's in Europe, so planned on coming home to the uk to see family and flying in and out of Europe for the wedding. But that is going to cost $7k (just flights and hotel for wedding) for dh and I. I don't have much leave as I've just moved roles, so can only really come for 2 weeks. We are on the IVF hamster wheel after multiple failures and could really do with not spending all that money. DH has suggested I go alone as it's also his busiest time at work. I don't really want to go alone as was looking forward to a break as I'm a burnt out mess. AIBU to ask the bride (my BF) if I can bring my DSis? Who is known well by the bride, means I'm not a bolt on to everyone else's happy families and means I get a bit of a break and some nice quality time with my DSis? But I don't want to put the bride in an awkward position. Thoughts?

I'm a burnt out mess.

YANBU. I wouldn't have a problem with this at all if I were her.

I can't imagine why the bride would mind this.

I think this seems reasonable particularly if your sister is known to the Bride.

If it was my wedding I'd say yes!

I also can’t imagine why the bride would mind, unless she really doesn’t like your sister.

YANBU, especially if you are a bridesmaid you must be good friends with the bride so she'll understand.

Hope you are ok. Sounds like a tough time

I’ve taken my adult DD as a plus one to a wedding. Seems a huge expense to be a BM; £3500 😭

I had an overseas wedding and one of my friends wanted to come, but didn't want to travel alone and she was single. Asked if her sister could come who I'd met once. I was fine with it.

Does your sister need to come to the wedding though? Could she just come on the trip with you and amuse herself for the day?

My dear friend did this for our wedding. It was lovely to know she had twice as nice a time.

I had a friend bring her sister to my wedding because her DH was overseas for work at the time.
Didnt have a problem with it at all.
I have also gone to a wedding once as someones plus one. I knew the bride, but not well. Have only met the groom a couple of times. They didnt mind at all, at least thats what they said.

I wouldn't ask the bride to bring someone who hadn't been invited. I think it's rude tbh. Your invitation wasn't you +1, it was specific to you and dh. You can each say yes or no individually, no problem, but I don't think you can say X isn't coming so can y cone instead. She might have a list of who else she'd invite if there was room to.

I'm really torn. I don't want to put her in a difficult position. But in the same token if I knew someone was spending that amount of annual leave/money to come to my wedding and want them to do what ever made her comfortable!!
A friend (who wasn't connected with any other friend group) came to my wedding with a plus one. She asked if that was ok and I didn't even think twice ......
Are DH being foolish, should we bite the bullet and both come. Will he/we regret it? It will be another 12/18 months until we are home again.

No, of course he won't regret not going to your friends wedding. Honestly, if it were me, I wouldn't be going at all at that price!