Split with ex-h recently. We have 2 children 6 and 4. The split was due to a variety of reasons on my side; he did absolutely nothing at all all day in the house or with the kids, took stupid risks in every area of his life, had been depressed for years but refused to take action or medication and used to undermine and belittle me at every opportunity (I posted under another name once about him visiting the supermarket but deciding I deserved neither cake, gift nor card on my birthday and telling me so).
He now has the kids after school most afternoons as I work and he doesn’t, and overnight EOW. No maintenance. The problem is that he abandons every single rule at his house. The kids have absolutely unlimited and unsupervised screen time. I’m talking 6-8 hours. He’s shown them how to work the tv controller. They eat nothing but fast food the entire time.
As a result he is the ‘fun parent’ and they are desperate and crying for him all the time. I work so hard to take care of them, the house, their schoolwork, everything and all they want is to go to his house and watch TV and eat nuggets. I’m so worried they will turn out to be like him, no work ethic or self control at all.
Is there anything I can do (I can’t talk to him as he’ll enjoy my unhappiness) and I don’t want to adversely affect my kids by limiting their time with him unless necessary.