Half job husband

[theremustbeaomethinginthewater]

Does anyone else have one of theE? AIBU to expect a full job to be done?

Some examples of HJH- feel free to add your own HJH experiences-

• emptying bin by placing outside front door rather than in black bin, and then not replacing bin bag or lid

• cleaning kitchen after dinner, and leaving washing up bowl upside down with dirty cloths on it, food clogging up the sink essential to leave in situ

• changing toddler nappy and then leaving soiled nappy and used wipes on carpet and walking off

• kicking shoes off when coming in, and leaving to amass in huge pile behind front door so impossible to get in or out with buggy. Cupboard less than a foot away.

• doing the washing and then sprinkling the wet clothes around the house on doors, chairs, bannisters- anywhere other than radiators or aired or tumble dryer, so it always ends up smelling a bit damp as it's left out for at least five days

• ironing a new shirt for work, leaving ironing board, iron, and shirt wrapper on landing for four days (and counting)

I'm 30 weeks pregnant so perhaps that why patience is running thin. I feel like I do most housework, and then also end up finishing off what he has started

Sorry to be that poster but some of these examples aren’t light hearted they are disrespectful and lazy and I don’t know how you put up with it to be honest.

Yup mines called 'half job Bob' (his name tho instead of bob)

Same sortve things as above...also said he'd put curtain rails up at his sisters and only put one screw in each end instead of two that are supposed to be there. So they started coming off the walls when the curtains went up.

He also agrees to do various diy tasks at home and it takes at least 6 months to start, then probably a good few weeks to finish
Things like fix a broken fence, super simple I always say I'll just do it myself but then he insists on doing it. Very annoying

Love the way some posters think that it's the woman's fault for 'accepting the behaviour'.

I have a DH like this - he does a lot round the house - but -yes - some of the things sound very familiar. ie rarely puts away clean dishes. Leaves washing out for many days saying 'It's still wet'

Strangely enough we have been married for 20 years and he has had these things pointed out to him many times - yes, that's called 'nagging' . Is that alone worth getting divorced over?

Good luck OP with not 'accepting the behaviour' 'cause even though you don't accept it - he may well keep on doing it.

Oh dear, I think i might be a shit husband by the sounds of it (I'm female 😂), I do many of these things that annoy you guys!

My dh loves to take an age to finish a job. Decorating takes months- our bedroom he painted half then left it about 6 months. When he went back to buy more paint B&Q had changed their range and he couldn't get the same colour so we now have two slightly different shades of grey in our room. Our living room he did quite quickly for him - accept he hasn't finished a half wall behind the sofa....

I vow to try and do better and put the hoover away, sweep up the mess instead of leave it in a corner and put the rubbish in the wheely bin rather than by the back door 🤣

My 'favourite' is opening the door of the washing machine or tumble dryer when the 'finished' alarm sounds to stop the noise but not emptying either - why??

I mind when this sort of thing is constant, because it grinds you down. But usually it’s not a big deal for some washing to be left on a bed for a day. I do it myself.

I’m not blaming anyone for ‘accepting the behaviour’ I'm saying I think that some of these examples sound like the partners are disrespectful, lazy and unkind, not the painting half a fence type examples which is what I was expecting to read about from the thread title, but the examples where the husbands clearly see themselves above the ‘shitwork’ which is not just rude and unkind, but sexist to boot.

I’ve got a half job wife. She does the washing up and the leaves a colossal teetering pile of crockery “to drain” rather than put it away, and will also leave stuff she’s washed on the worksurface “to drain” where the dirty stuff goes rather than dry it and put it away. Inevitably dirty stuff ends up being piled around, and then on top, of it. And don’t get me started on her methodology around “sorting stuff out” which basically involves putting things in piles in really inconvenient places and then losing interest/running out of steam and leaving it for months. I always end up shifting the piles after weeks of everyone falling over them, for which I get no end of shit.

Btw, not just me complaining about it but the DC too.

Doing half the washing up and inexplicably leaving the rest on the side (despite it being him who insists these things do not go in the dishwasher). The lack of bin bag replacement really grinds my gears!

I am divorced from a man like this and he would fly into a rage if picked up on it.
He now lives in a smelly dirty flat that the kids are reluctant to visit. Sad really

Behind all this is the smug assumption that all this is really someone else's job and doing anything at all deserves a medal.

Tackle the attitude at source, by sitting down and discussing who does what and why, as following up individual half-done jobs is both exhausting and quickly called nagging, allowing the offender to play victim.

As a general rule, agree that whoever starts a job sees it right through, that both of you should tackle what you see needs doing and not leave it, and that nobody sits down until all the jobs are done and both of you do.

I have one of these. Drives me mad. I think he is thinking of the next task he is going to do and just gets distracted.

It's definitely a man thing!

• toiletries for bathroom in a neat pile by the stairs to take up and put away.....be only takes HIS things 😡

• brings the shopping bags in from the car and then leaves by the cupboards - doesn't put away 😡

• hangs wet towels OVER THE DOOR not on the nice heated towel rail NEXT to the door 😡😡

I have one of these

"Take the washing out of he machine babe" LITERALLY takes it out and leaves it all wet on the side

Recycling pile he puts anything on, including the nets that clementines come in?!?!?! because "you sort it out"

Washes up but leaves kitchen side and floor and shit clogging up the sink

These things arent because he is lazy its because I havent told him exactly what to do, if i leave clear precise instructions he will just do it. Other than this severe lack of common sense with regards to everyday house hold tasks he is an amazing person and Dad so I make allowances and we laugh about it.

I feel everyone's pain. Have some similar instances. However, 're drinks cans not put in recycling- don't you/him rinse them first?

Otherwise you're contaminating the recycling!

AgeOld Guardian link is very true. My Dh is fab, he does a lot. But he still doesn't 'get' the mental load issue.

My ex was like this and used to drive me mad. He’d hoover and then leave it in the middle of the room or mop and leave the water in the bucket for example.

My children drive me mad by not bringing the bins in from the road in collection day. They have to walk past them to get home so just need to drag them in as they pass. I drive to the house so have to walk back to get them. I’m addressing it! Lol.

Will hoover the living room but leave the hoover in the middle of the room, not empty it then declare - I've done the hoovering for you!

Will walk past everything on the stairs that's to go back upstairs

Leave wallet, phone, keys in different places around the house so when in a rush can never find them

If doing the dishes leaves all the cutlery, glasses and lunch boxes on the side claims he doesn't know where they go

Leaves all his dirty clothes next to the washing basket

Over the years I've got used to it, he does his fair share around the house but the little things like this really nag me and I call him half a job

Saw this today and thought of this thread.

Yes my DH is exactly the same as this.

He would rather leave dirty dishes on the worktops or in the sink than empty the clean stuff from the dishwasher and reload it with the dirty stuff.
He used to leave dirty laundry on top of the laundry basket lid rather than opening it and placing it inside- that always baffled me to no end.
He likes to leave his shoes in the doorway so everyone trips over them, no idea why.
He has definitely left dirty nappies laying around on the living room floor before instead of putting them in the washing machine.

Will walk past everything on the stairs that's to go back upstairs

Both DH and DC are guilty of this and they would continue to walk past it for months if I didn’t nag at them.

Yep. Mine does his ironing then leaves his shirts hanging up in the lounge like some kind of trophy.

Mans favourite here is 3 or 4 times a year emptying every cupboard in house to tidy sort declutter and then getting called into work so I then have a entire house to put back away , laundry is taken out of dryer and left on kitchen table as a perfect cat bed, things never go back in the fridge . But in a million other ways he is amazing so I can grit my teeth and bare it

@wibdib is this the article you meant? SheDivorcedMe

My friend and I also have half-a-job husbands and often joke that perhaps we could make a whole one out of the two of them 😂

I don't know how anyone lives like this. My husband just now opened a twin pack of biscuits, emptied one pack into the biscuit tin, then took the now-redundant outer twin packet wrapper and put it in the bin, returning the single remaining pack to the cupboard.

You too could achieve these results!