I'm not responsible for hospital's decision

[Orangeblossom78]

My family are making me feel responsible for my elderly dad being sent home from the hospital.

He hurt himself on some broken furniture in his sheltered housing flat. And as it was over the holiday period no-one came for ages to help, ended up going into hospital and getting patched up.

So, nothing major such as a heart attack etc...the hospital rang me (dad had given my number I think as next of kin) Anyway they told me they were sending him home and I asked if it would be Ok for hospital transport as I live far away, and they agreed.

However, my sibling is saying they wished they had been spoken to instead. That they should have kept him in and assessed him more. I think they want him to go into more supported accommodation and this would have helped.

However the hospital physio spoke to me and explained dad was medically fit to go home, if his home was unsafe with broken furniture etc then that needed sorted out at home, and he was mobilising and managing showering ok etc and also they had lots of flu cases and didn't want him catching that.

Also he wanted to go home and I think that needs respected as well.
AIBU? Talking to them further wouldn't have changed things. Feel like now dad is home I am being blamed for this as family nearby now taking time off work etc to help him clear up.

Furrybootsyecomfy - several complaints to PALS, upheld each time. Fortunately with excellent support from a new GP at the practice we were able to nurse my mum at home without any further admissions for her last 6 months.

I'm sorry they didn’t call my sibling also but it was just to inform us what was happening and I guess they can't spend ages contacting all the relatives.
It was not to ask permission but more as a courtesy as dad does have capacity.

The staff have no right to call family and discuss your father’s care without his written permission. It was for him to inform you, if he wished to. I would be both against all good practice guidance and a serious lack of courtesy to their patient to inform family about someone who was able to make their own decisions.

I was a bit surprised they did call and talk about his medical stuff as much as they did to be honest. Thought it would be confidential. I guessed it was because I was next of kin. It is the first time I have had this.

Hospital beds are in extremely high demand. This isn't about you it's aboit resources. I don't wish to sound unki d but hospitals cannot keep people in beds they don't need because of non medical reasons.

If I lived hubdreds of miles away I think I would have called the nearby siblings to check if it was ok.

@orangeblossom78 my dad is in sheltered housing but he has signed a document which allows me to speak to the council, the warden, etc on his behalf as he gets too confused etc sometimes with what's going on or if he needs help etc. Could you look into that and see if he would sign something similar and then you can push for more care etc?

My mother has been hospitalised a couple of times in recent years. Both times OTs contacted me to talk about whether she could be discharged home or whether she would need further aids, and made arrangements to inspect her flat before she went back.