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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

Need quick answers - should I help

57 replies

alwaysscared · 14/01/2020 08:18

Someone on a group on Facebook I am on is desperate. Has no money until thurs and her elec is going to go off. She has 2 kids. She has asked, in a very embarrassed way, if anyone can help with £10. She has left her PayPal account email. Should I help? Can I be defrauded on PayPal? I know you shouldn't really send money to strangers but I can't stand the thought of those poor kids and her having no elec. Is it better to get her bank details or do through paypal?

OP posts:

Original poster

alwaysscared · 14/01/2020 08:19

I don't know what to do. My heart is saying help but my head is saying leave it

OP posts:

missjaysays · 14/01/2020 08:20

Can you have a look at her profile? Does she seem genuine?

Original poster

alwaysscared · 14/01/2020 08:21

She does seem genuine, and has been on the group a long time. Her and kids have been poorly so extra expenses have occurred (prescriptions, journeys to docs etc)

OP posts:

MustardScreams · 14/01/2020 08:22

I would tbh if I could spare the money. I’d rather lose £10 to a scam than see someone suffering.

GrannyBags · 14/01/2020 08:22

Is she a friend? Does she have any family to help out? I don’t think you can get scammed on PayPal but maybe buying her a food voucher or electricity card would help in the same way without you having to share bank details?

TheQueef · 14/01/2020 08:23

Fuck it, worst case scenario she's scams you for 10.
I would.

Espoleta · 14/01/2020 08:25

I would (and do) in a heartbeat.
On PayPal you can only be scammed out of what you gave her- so £10

Nanny0gg · 14/01/2020 08:25

She won't get your bank details.

She may end up with more than £10 But if she's been around a while I think I would

AlwaysCheddar · 14/01/2020 08:29

Prescriptions would be free???

PrincessPain · 14/01/2020 08:30

I don't know if it would come across as arsey if you suggested it. But I've heard most suppliers will give/loan some electric if you're struggling and have young children.

LIZS · 14/01/2020 08:33

Do you actually know her? Prescriptions would not be charged for under 18s, most utilities would give emergency allowance, she could get referred to food bank. I doubt your £10 would go towards it.

Scarlettpixie · 14/01/2020 08:33

I would help given she has been in the group a long time and discussed her struggles. Paypal is secure so far as I know.

PurpleDaisies · 14/01/2020 08:34

Is this somebody you actually know?

PurpleDaisies · 14/01/2020 08:35

I would tbh if I could spare the money. I’d rather lose £10 to a scam than see someone suffering.

Scammers make people suffer and this is exactly why they keep getting away with it.

KittenVsBox · 14/01/2020 08:37

The "scam" is probably more along the lines of her hoping 20 people will donate, gaining £200. Or it's real.

PineappleDanish · 14/01/2020 08:37

I’d rather lose £10 to a scam than see someone suffering.

Which is EXACTLY the reason why scammers target facebook groups and sites like Mumsnet. A never ending supply of gullible people who want to think they're doing something good.

More fool you if you paypal money to a randomer you don't know. Far, far better to send the same £10 to your local foodbank, poverty charity, homeless shelter, debt relief campaign organisation.

But it doesn't give posters the same warm glow of being bountiful, so they don't.

OneUsernameOnly · 14/01/2020 08:39

Her supplier will extend her emergency credit/put credit on her metre which she will pay back at an affordable amount each week. Advise her to call them.

Nanny0gg · 14/01/2020 08:41

She's been poorly as well. Hence prescription charges.

Todaythiscouldbe · 14/01/2020 08:41

I'm going to go against the grain here and say I wouldn't help. If all she needs is £10 then I'm sure she has friends or family to help. Doing it this way, with her details included in the post, pretty much guarantees she will get much more than £10.

She may be genuine but prescriptions would be free (for the children definitely and probably for her as well if she's on a low income)

Most food banks will help with emergency credit for utilities, that should be her first port of call.

I know I sound uncaring but I've been taken in by things like this in the past.

PurpleDaisies · 14/01/2020 08:42

She's been poorly as well. Hence prescription charges.

No. She's claims to have been poorly as well. Hence prescription charges.

LGY1 · 14/01/2020 08:45

When we moved into this house we had pay as you go meters.
I was working from home all day & used £1 a day in electric.
For electric from today until Thur she will need about £3....
I would wait to see if anyone else donates / comments
The meter should also give her around £5 in emergency credit - 5 days (although she may be at the end of that)

SirVixofVixHall · 14/01/2020 08:46

I would help. I would rather risk being conned out of a tenner, than risk not helping her when she really needs a hand.

PurpleDaisies · 14/01/2020 08:46

Has anyone from the group ever met this person in real life?

TheBigFatMermaid · 14/01/2020 08:50

I would advise her to ring the power supplier and ask them to credit her meter. They do do this, I have had it done twice now.

This way, she gets the needed help at no loss to anyone!

AgentProvocateur · 14/01/2020 08:52

I would, if I had it spare.

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