Feeling annoyed but not sure whether I have a right to be. Feel free to tell me I’m a CF.
I have a close friend who I’ve known for around 3 years. We normally don’t get each other Christmas presents as we both already have plenty of people to buy for (both have kids and big families) so it’s an expensive time. We do however get each other a small token gift at birthdays and we spend a lot of time together and treat each other during days out (I’ll pay for Costa one day and vice versa).
Last year I had some financial issues and really struggled. Told everyone at Christmas I wouldn’t be spending much so they knew what to expect and to not go absolutely crazy with presents for me (unless they still wanted to). As me and said friend had never bought each other anything during Christmas I didn’t think to mention it. She knew about my financial issues though, thankfully I’m not in that position anymore and it was just a very short term situation.
Around the end of November out of the blue friend said she’d bought me an amazing gift and couldn’t wait to give it to me. I said “oh you shouldn’t have but thank you, I can’t wait to see what it is”. After that I felt so bloody guilty that I hadn’t bought her anything so managed to pull £25 out of my arse and buy her a few small things that I thought she would like and make use of.
Unfortunately we didn’t get time to see each other before Christmas as I worked right up until Christmas Eve. Arranged to meet up last Monday for a cuppa and catch up and exchange gifts. Turned up on Monday and gave her the gifts, she seemed to like them and said thank you, but had no gift for me. No mention of said gift either. I found it very strange since that was the whole point of our meeting really since we didn’t have time to do it before Xmas. I thought maybe she had forgotten and would text me later on that night but nothing. We’ve spoken since on the phone and I saw her today quickly on my way home from work but still nothing. Absolutely no mention of said gift.
I understand we don’t give to receive but had she not told me she’d bought me a gift I wouldn’t have sacrificed £25 at a time when I really needed it. I only bought her a gift out of guilt really as she said she’d bought me an “amazing gift”. I wouldn’t have felt so guilty not getting her anything if she hadn’t of mentioned it as that’s what we’ve always done. Does that make sense? I won’t say anything as I’m in a better position now and I appreciate £25 isn’t a lot in the grand scheme of things but AIBU to feel the way I do? She’s a good friend in all other aspects but I can’t help but feel really put out.